Im miserable at my new job!!! HELP!

Blackheartednurse · Oct 9, 2009

Wow,kuddos to you! All I have to say is that those people sound really miserable and just keep telling yourself that you are there for your patients not for those unhappy coworkers!

MORN25 · Oct 9, 2009

There are so many options when it comes to nursing, don't stay somewhere you hate for too long. My belief is there are two things that make or break your job: the patients, and your coworkers. If both are great, you love your job. If both are not, you hate it. And if you love one, and the other is bad (or if you don't have a passion for the patients you are working with), you will stay in that job, not knowing that there is a job out there that you would LOVE, for as long as you can take it, and then get a better job, and not beleive you stayed miserable that long when something so much better is out there. At least that was my experience. It's always hard the first few months though-you're going to be stressed, because you really start to discover just how much there is to learn. Good Luck, keep learning and growing, and you will get the confidence to find that job you love someday.

Cherybaby · Oct 9, 2009

One thing I can tell you about nurses. We tend to be cliquish. We shouldn't be...we should be more welcoming and nurturing toward our young nurses. Sadly, some don't see it that way. Many see new nurses as a threat. New nurses come in with their rose colored glasses, all excited to do new things and treat patients. It's wonderfully refreshing to many of us "old nurses", but sadly, there are the select few that can't be bothered showing the ropes to the new kid. And, it sounds like you are going through just that. Generally, time heals that. They will get to know you eventually and maybe even come to rely upon and trust in you. However, trying to do your job while waiting for that day to come can be very frustrating.

Let me assure you that the grass is not always greener at another job, so don't look to jump ship too quickly. Do your job to the best of your ability. Ask questions when you need to. Offer to lend a hand when you can. They'll warm up to you eventually. Don't be too discouraged. Just do the very best work that you can and be a good advocate for your patients.

Don't let those few co-workers who are anti-social set the tone for your day. This is more than likely a problem with THEM...not you. Try to remember that.

Some people are just miserable people in general. You're going to meet a lot of them along the way. Don't let them shake you or change your positive attitude.

Good luck to you...and congrats on the RN!

Virgo_RN, BSN, RN · Oct 9, 2009

Let me assure you that the grass is not always greener at another job, so don't look to jump ship too quickly. Do your job to the best of your ability. Ask questions when you need to. Offer to lend a hand when you can. They'll warm up to you eventually. Don't be too discouraged. Just do the very best work that you can and be a good advocate for your patients.

This. Focus on doing the best you can for your patients, be polite and helpful to your coworkers, and the ones that will come around will come around, and those that won't, won't. :redbeathe

rnpjop · Oct 9, 2009

I think the nurses who are snooty to you....well, it says a lot more about THEM, rather than you. Try and remember that, like the last poster said. There are people like that every where you go. Try to avoid those people-just don't waste your precious time on them. At least there ARE some who are nice and pleasant to you. I once had a job that I lasted 6 wks. at. It was in a small area....me and 3 other nurses. NONE of them cared for me. I had never had that experience before and haven't since. I always felt like I had gotten along really well at work before this one. I actually went home in tears many days and I was in my early 30's. I quit that job without notice after 6 wks. The ONLY nursing job I've ever had where I did such a thing. On the other hand, had a job where we all got along great, were good friends outside the hospital, and looking back on it.....it was great and I haven't had that since either.

Hang in there and do the best you can do.....but if you have a physical reaction before going to work.....and this continues, well, I personally feel it might be in your best interest to look for something else.

PostOpPrincess, BSN, RN · Oct 9, 2009

I hope things get better.

With people, it's not your job to be liked, just respected. This is a life lesson that took me a long time (female socialization process should change!). Chalk this up to a good life lesson, just do your work and look around for a new job that won't make you physically sick. That's not good. In the meantime, breathe deep and learn some good calming/coping skills.

LaneyB · Oct 9, 2009

I had a similiar experience. I stayed at the job for a full year, just so it looked ok on my resume. Now I am at a place where the people are wonderful, and for the most part everyone gets along and is supportive. We do have occasional spats, but everyone gets over it and moves on.

I would NOT stay in a toxic work environment. It begins to affect other aspects of your life, and life is too short to be miserable.

kittykatty · Oct 9, 2009

I know this may sound weird but the few times that I have been in that situation (clique barrier) I either ignored it entirely or made a point to purposefully interject myself into situations so they would have to deal with me. That works only if you are up to the initial rejection--but hey--you're being rejected now. As I get older I pretty much don't care what someone thinks or says--as long as they don't interfer with me and my life. In the past, it would have almost destroyed me not to be included in a group but if it happened now I know I would just push back--and since I don't back down ever--I think they would be the ones warming up to me.

But really if it is all that important to you that these people like you then---determine which person in the clique is most susceptible to being brought to your side (translation--the nicest person in the bunch) and every chance you get talk to her or him away from the group. At least you'll be able to show 1 person how nice you are and then usually (but not always) the group follows. Just keep in mind, anyone that relys on a group for their identity or well being is usually a weak person anyway. Safety in numbers I guess.

And don't forget this experience--someday you may be in the position to welcome someone new into a work group--don't forget how it feels.

Oh by the way--stick it out for at least a year for your resume and if you don't feel better by then--leave.

Spritenurse1210, BSN, RN · Oct 9, 2009

I don't think it's your problem. It's thiers. Dig your heels in and stick it out for a year, then find somewhere else to work. good luck to you!

wishinguponastarLPN · Oct 9, 2009

Hello everyone Im a new RN been knew for about 3 months now and Im just not happy at my job, my stomach starts to hurt before I go in. Im currently working on a medsurg floor with a ratio of 8:1. The job itself is stressful, the patients are really "heavy" some have peg tubes, trachs. Anyhow, the main thing that is making me miserable is the staff. There are a couple of coworkers who are just not friendly to me, at first when I would try to spark up a conversation they would sort of ignore me, so now I dont even bother to try to talk to them. I can be an introvert but only to people who I dont feel confortable around, Everytime I walk on the unit, they dont even say hi to me, there are some other coworkers who are friendly and I love talking to them but the other ones I just feel so uncomfortable around them. I dont know what Im doing wrong, Im friendly to everyone I am a really nice person, they make me feel like Im not fitting in or something, I know this is stupid and I shouldnt worry about stuff like this, I know Im not at work to make friends but the work enviroment is horrible when people around you act as if they dont like you.

I am currently a nursing student, but I work full time in Accounting. Let me say that you can experience this anywhere you go. I have been working in an office for 7 months and the people here SUCK! They are stuck up, they all come from money. There have been times I have tried to talk to these people and they look at me like I have 2 heads or something! Anyway, my point is I have found a new job and I can't wait to start on the 19th! But, while I was here I never let them know that they bothered me and I did the very best at my job. I would say, do the same, focus on your patients. I know we all like to communicate and make friends with the people we work with, but it doesn't always work that way. Remeber you are there to treat patients, not socialize, so it make work best in your favor that you can focus more on the patient. Good Luck!

RuRnurse? · Oct 9, 2009

Noeissa, you may want to consider a different place to work! It's been my experience that places with attitudes like that are not great places to work. Chances are, the administration is at fault, admin sets the tone for any facility. As the saying goes, "A fish rots from the head down".

If these co-workers are so miserable, chances are that the admin is as well. You can't beat that, so a different place is the only way to handle it from your end. Leave the miserable ones to their job, and drive on!