I don't care anymore, I'm never saying another thing...

Nurses General Nursing


  • by RN1982
    Specializes in ICU/Critical Care.

You are reading page 2 of I don't care anymore, I'm never saying another thing...

Specializes in Med/Surg.

I'm sorry you got that reaction, TLS. I know that for me, I've been quite (too?) vocal lately about things that aren't working right (as they are making tons of changes in my facility, including to staffing, and we're "working out the kinks"). Luckily, for now at least, our manager is on our side as far as our frustrations go, and is at odds with the CNO about the things being imposed, so she listens. That hasn't always been the case, and may not remain so, but I am thankful for now.

It bucks the popular opinion, but I would keep speaking up. Your intention is for the good of your unit. Wording makes a big difference, I think (not that I think you're saying anything the wrong way, but I hope you know what I mean). I actually give you kudos for WANTING so speak up and change/fix things, too many people just go along with a system that needs obvious improvement, and that's a much worse thing.


205 Posts

Specializes in mental health.

If something needs changing, get the whole crew involved and ALL of you take it up the chain.

Specializes in L&D.

I am saddened to see this much cynicism. I hope most are just venting as the origional poster said she was.

Keeping quiet and not pointing out problems and suggesting ways of improving them is one sure way of keeping the problems around for a long time. It will also burn you out sooner. If constructive criticism is not appreciated where you work, perhaps you are working at the wrong place.

I would take some time to get my feelings in control and plan what I want to say, and then I'd approach my Director and tell her how I felt about being criticized for offering constructive criticism in a private manner and that I fail to see how that could be construed as bring down the whole team. Now, I'm old as the hills and have retired and returned to work once already. My Director and her assistant could have been babies I delivered. There's not too much that scares me anymore. What are they going to do, fire me? I'm old enough for Social Security, I only keep working because I like birthin' babies. You may not be in a similiar position.

I tend to preface any talk about my feelings with, "Many years ago, I learned in therapy that I have to talk about my feelings." Which is true. I then talk about my feelings, using "I messages". "I felt hurt that you criticized me for offering constructive criticisizm about what happened the other day." I might ask why she though this was bringing down the team, what she wanted me to do when I saw a potentioa problem and had a suggestion to make it better.

Good luck in whatever you do. I just know for me that I go crazy (thus the therapy) if I don't deal directly with this type of situation.

highlandlass1592, BSN, RN

1 Article; 647 Posts

Specializes in Critical Care.
It just ****** me off to no end. I love being a nurse. I'm very passionate about what I do. Nursing will never get the recognition it deserves because of crap like this from the higher ups. Have managers forgotten that they were once bedside nurses themselves? It makes me sick.

One problem with that thought: not all managers started out as bedside nurses. I've worked for plenty that never, ever practiced at the bedside and went straight into managment. One even mentioned she'd never, ever do bedside nursing..she couldn't hack it! Her biggest concern as a manager wasn't staffing issues, acuity issues, but that all nurses should wear the same color scrubs.

Specializes in M/S, MICU, CVICU, SICU, ER, Trauma, NICU.

NEVER say anything negative on EMAIL.


223 Posts

Specializes in Level II & III NICU, Mother-Baby Unit.

This is a very interesting thread. Obviously many of us feel quite passionate about this subject.

As a bedside nurse who has never been a manager I am more familiar with the grunt end of the of work. A dear friend was a nurse manager for a while but left due to the politics of it; she said that her job mainly consisted of hearing complaints all day, from staff, patients & their families, and her higher ups. She did; however, make some good changes which the nurses appreciated. She gave me some advice that when as a staff nurse I have an issue/problem that I should speak with the manager and tell her the problem but also bring a possible solution to the table too. I have found this to be helpful.

On another note, my father taught me before I was a nurse that I should always do my best to make my boss look good while at the same time always be aiming to do whatever is needed (education, etc.) to get that person's job for myself... his way of teaching me about politics and how to advance myself in my career.

I don't want to be a manager though... I most certainly agree that I should be very, very careful about what I write in an email!!!

My last comment is that not all managers are approachable even though they claim to be and to want our input. I have worked for more managers who would sooner see me gone than to be giving them more issues for them to resolve. The managers who have never worked at the bedside seem to be the least understanding of what we go through day in and day out at the bedside.

Just my humble opinion...

pagandeva2000, LPN

7,984 Posts

Specializes in Community Health, Med-Surg, Home Health.

I feel the same way...I have learned to keep quiet. So many times, I questioned, provided proof from the state, offered suggestions to make things work more smoothly, and then, I am told that it is my fault. So, I learned not to speak as often because they really don't wish to hear anything but about the bed of roses they believe they made.


1,975 Posts

First off, this is a vent.

I sent my manager an email about somethings that went wrong during shift report that we do as a group before each shift and how things could be done better. I get pulled into the manager's office this morning and chastized like a little child and am told that I'm bringing the team down and that while I do send positive emails about the staff, it's just sandwiching good stuff on top of bad stuff. Fine. I'm not saying another gosh darn thing.

What you said clearly was accurate because if it wasn't it wouldn't have hit a raw nerve with management. Even though you want to be quiet now I wouldn't be. I wouldn't let them squash your enthusiam and willingness to make your working environment more productive which is beneficial to all.

I would calm down and speak with their superior. It stinks to be the one to have to put themselves out there but someone has to do it. I'm sorry you were treated this way. You shouldn't have been and your manager's superior has the right to know what is going on so they can take steps to rectify the situation.


697 Posts

Specializes in Med Surg.

I've seen it dozens of times over the years. It doesn't matter whether it's nursing, banking, manufacturing, or retail. People who are in charge usually have no interest in suggestions unless their own butts are are feeling the flames. Then, they expect their people to come up with a way to pull them out of the fire.

Sadly, the working world has changed over the years and not for the better. Where it used to be all about the team it is now every one for themselves. CYA is the name of the game.


1,341 Posts

Its not just nursing, this type of thing happens across the spectrum of jobs and industries.


294 Posts

Yeap... this sort of thing happens in all industries, not just nursing. I learned my lesson a long time ago, it does not pay to complain about anything or anyone to your managers. If there is something YOU can improve in your work enviroment, present it in a positive spin, show the manager how it will help them and the company's bottom line.

If its something that management can improve, forget about it, let them figure it out in their time. No matter how right you are... they will label you as the complainer. My motto is.... keep my mouth shut, come to work, show committment, work above and beyond and then go home.


348 Posts

It just ****** me off to no end. I love being a nurse. I'm very passionate about what I do. Nursing will never get the recognition it deserves because of crap like this from the higher ups. Have managers forgotten that they were once bedside nurses themselves? It makes me sick.

Are you aware that many of today's nursing managers may have been bedside nurses for only a very short time if at all (especially prevalent in long term care), or may have the opinion that bedside nursing is beneath them? It makes me sick, too.

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