Unexcusable

[bethin]

I just need to vent about my horrid day. I'm an aide on med surg.

Had an elderly male pt whose wife had been abusing him for some time. Malnurished (think Auschwitz), dirty, etc. She shows up after pt statd that she was not to be allowed to visit. I found her shaking him by the shoulders, screaming at him, demanding to know what he signed, that he has no rights, etc. I pulled her off him, being careful because she is elderly herself. I'm floored. I'm not that naive to think that women don't abuse men, but this was so sad I cried on the way home. I feel helpless because as an aide I can't do much. Social work and the nice family members (irony: her daughters) are POA now. Daughter states, who lives out of town that she thinks he hasn't been bathed in months. He had been locked in a closet without heat or food for days.

The nurses weren't too happy that I handled this situation but by God, I'm not going to stand by and watch a woman (or anyone) abuse another. Evil prevails because good men do nothing. There are plenty of witnesses to the abuse and I'm just perplexed that this woman hasn't be arrested and I think a restraining order is in order.

I gave the pt a nice long bath, shaved him, brushed his teeth and with his permission cut his hair. Did his nails. He slept like a baby after that and I told him that the wife wouldn't get past me again. I've been on the receiving end of abuse and I know no matter what age you are, it hurts your self esteem and makes you feel like crap.

Some days I really really hate my job. I know without a doubt that I couldn't do this everyday. And I wanted to do peds before I changed my major.

Edit: is it unexcusable or inexcusable? Either way you know what I mean.

[jackson145]

It sounds like you were that man's guardian angel today. Because of your intervention, he may get to live out his days with comfort and dignity. Certainly, no one could (or should have to) do that everyday, but remember, God never gives us more than we are able to handle. It appears to me, that God exactly which aide to have that patient assigned to!

Just curious, for what reasons were the nurses not happy about you handling the situation?

[Tait, MSN, RN]

As far as I can tell from here you took extra good care of a patient that needed the attention. (Bathing, nails etc)

Seems above and beyond in my book.

Next time I would probably call a security code and let them deal with her.

Good job.

Tait

[bethin]

Just curious, for what reasons were the nurses not happy about you handling the situation?

Because I'm an aide.

[jackson145]

Because I'm an aide.

Did they think it was out of your scope of practice to protect a patient? I don't think they'd be able to back that up. Perhaps they just wanted to be the hero? After all, we aides just wipe bottoms, right? We aren't educated enough to actually protect a patient, are we?

[Virgo_RN, BSN, RN]

Because I'm an aide.

That's ridiculous. :angryfire You did good!

[kukukajoo, LPN]

Have the police been alerted? What you describe is a crime!!!

[EmmaG, RN]

Some days I really really hate my job. I know without a doubt that I couldn't do this everyday. And I wanted to do peds before I changed my major.

You saved this man's life and made him feel safe and secure for the first time in God knows how long.

It appears to me, that God exactly which aide to have that patient assigned to!

Absolutely.

I hope this woman was reported to Adult Protective Services.

[bethin]

Did they think it was out of your scope of practice to protect a patient? I don't think they'd be able to back that up. Perhaps they just wanted to be the hero? After all, we aides just wipe bottoms, right? We aren't educated enough to actually protect a patient, are we?

I don't give a flip what I am, I see abuse in action I will step in. It's in my nature to protect those that can't protect themselves. It's my duty to do so and I couldn't live with myself if I let the abuse go on.

I still would like to see her arrested or a restraining order.

[EmmaG, RN]

I don't give a flip what I am, I see abuse in action I will step in. It's in my nature to protect those that can't protect themselves. It's my duty to do so and I couldn't live with myself if I let the abuse go on.

I still would like to see her arrested or a restraining order.

If Social Work is POA, then it's probably in the works.

[meimeiy]

I just need to vent about my horrid day. I'm an aide on med surg.

Had an elderly male pt whose wife had been abusing him for some time. Malnurished (think Auschwitz), dirty, etc. She shows up after pt statd that she was not to be allowed to visit. I found her shaking him by the shoulders, screaming at him, demanding to know what he signed, that he has no rights, etc. I pulled her off him, being careful because she is elderly herself. I'm floored. I'm not that naive to think that women don't abuse men, but this was so sad I cried on the way home. I feel helpless because as an aide I can't do much. Social work and the nice family members (irony: her daughters) are POA now. Daughter states, who lives out of town that she thinks he hasn't been bathed in months. He had been locked in a closet without heat or food for days.

The nurses weren't too happy that I handled this situation but by God, I'm not going to stand by and watch a woman (or anyone) abuse another. Evil prevails because good men do nothing. There are plenty of witnesses to the abuse and I'm just perplexed that this woman hasn't be arrested and I think a restraining order is in order.

I gave the pt a nice long bath, shaved him, brushed his teeth and with his permission cut his hair. Did his nails. He slept like a baby after that and I told him that the wife wouldn't get past me again. I've been on the receiving end of abuse and I know no matter what age you are, it hurts your self esteem and makes you feel like crap.

Some days I really really hate my job. I know without a doubt that I couldn't do this everyday. And I wanted to do peds before I changed my major.

Edit: is it unexcusable or inexcusable? Either way you know what I mean.

You were the pt's advocate! We need more people in the nursing profession who truly put the patient's needs in priority. You provided the patient a sense of safety and comfort that he deserved.

The nurse should thank you for helping her take care of the patient's immediate needs. You are a great person and you will be a great nurse!

[mom4josh]

Bless you for taking such good care of that man. You will be rewarded.

BTW, since you asked... it's 'inexcusable', but we knew what you meant.