I have been a lurker of this site for about 4 years now and finally decided to make an account today. Before I get started here's a little bit of background information about me.
I am 21, from Texas. I am a senior BSN program. I still live at home with my mom and 2 younger siblings.
Now for the story...
I am having family issues at home. It has not been the first time, it actually happens very often. My mom and I have never really had a great relationship since I can remember. She seems to have a "favorite" child, whom is my 16 year old sister. Since I can remember she has always gone out of her way to satisfy my sister, kiss her **s just to make sure not to disappoint her. She will pretty much agree with anything my sister does and says just to please her. Recently, she brought up the idea of my letting my sister go off to college. This is where my problem comes in..
When it was my time to go off to college she absolutely said no and threatened that if I left she would not talk to me anymore. I didn't have a car, had never held a job before, and the first person in my family to attend college so the thought of me being out on my own without a parent to talk to scared me, so I followed my mom's wishes and stayed close. She then told me that if I went to a local college (20 minutes away) I could move on campus. Once I agreed to go to the local college and it was time for me to look for dorms, she said no. Fast forward 4 years later, I'm a senior in a nursing program, 21 years old, and she still will not agree to let me move out!!! She has also tried to talk me into living here once I graduate college as well. NOT HAPPENING.
It angers me because she's agreed to let my sister leaves once she finishes high school. Today I brought up the option of moving into my own apartment (about 15 minutes away) and she flipped out. I am not happy living here because she is controlling my whole life. Not to mention she also tries to control my friends, who I date, my money, etc. Pretty much my whole life. Meanwhile, my 16 year old sisters lives a better life than me. She claims that she doesn't care if I left, but soon as I bring it up all hell breaks loose.
The only reason I have not up and left yet is because I do not want to upset or disappoint my mom in any way but it seems as though she is going to control me as long as I allow her to BUT now I think its time for me to go whether she likes it or not. I do not feel like it's fair for her to choose my college and place of residence for 4 years of my life, meanwhile actively plans and help look for colleges for my sister to move to once she graduates. I have basically lived 4 years of my life for my mom. It has been so miserable.
I have no clue what it's like to be a college student honestly. All I do is go to school, work, and home. No life at all.
PS: She MADE me stay here and MAKES me pay rent as well. She has never put in a dime on my college education. I've paid out of pocket or loans.
