But I have little kids!

[Tweety]

I deserve Christmas off." Sigh....every years it's the same. Single, no kids with many years at this hospital, against newbies with kids.

One of these days it's gonna get ugly. I have a family too, I like Christmas too. Maybe.

To any student nurses with kids. Guess what. It's a 24-hour operation. Open on Christmas day whether you have kids, plans, or have to cook or not. You are not entitled.

Sorry. Just ranting.

[tntrn, ASN, RN]

I'm with you SmilingBlueEYes. I work per diem, but can't imagine working only weekend, all holidays and as far as coming in on short notice, that depends. If they put me on/call just before they 'call me in on short notice', it means time and a half, and I'll drop just about anything I'm doing to help them help me help them. But when everybody else gets OT when they go in on short notice, there's very little chance I'm going to do the same at straight time.

Like you said, "prn's have lives too." And mine is a rather full one.

[santhony44, MSN, RN, NP]

Most places I've worked rotated holidays, but also had people willing to swap days. I've worked lots of Thanksgivings and New Years Eve/Day to get Christmas Eve/Day off. I rarely was the one doing the asking, actually. Sometimes I'd let it be known that I was willing to work Thanksgiving/New Years in return for Christmas, and left it up to my co-workers. I think pressuring people to swap with you, for whatever reason, is rude and selfish. The important thing is to be fair and reciprocate and to treat people the way you want to be treated. On any one unit, it usually does not take long to find out who will work with you and who won't. I might work once for someone who then couldn't ever quite manage to do the same for me, but usually only once! Fortunately most people I've worked with weren't like that.

Why anyone wants a particular day off, or what their specific plans are, is really no one else's business. I once had a heated discussion with a co-worker who wanted me to swap with her. I told her that I could not, that I already had plans; she got so furious that I wouldn't tell her what those were, I thought she was going to hit me! (I was actually working a second job, with my manager's knowledge and consent, and had scheduled that day after I got my primary work schedule and had been given that day off). She decided on the spur of the moment that she wanted to go out of town and thought that I was *supposed* to switch with her! I worked part-time, and of course had life so much easier and better than she because I had a husband and she didn't. I think that gave me a taste of that "entitlement" that others have spoken of, and it's very unpleasant to deal with! Unfortunately I had become the focus of her frustrations because some things had gone wrong in her life, largely due to some bad decisions. But, that's another story!

[itsme]

Hellonurse, I cant believe the gall of someone to say that a person with out kids is selfish. what a crock! Whether or not someone has kids is a personal decision and no one elses business. Not having kids is not selfish. I think I may have been tempted to smack some idiot for saying that !!! The majority of my and my husbands friends do not have kids, have been married 15 years or more, and are very unselfish! I dont know why they never had kids, it isnt my business to know!

[night owl]

With JACHO at our place this week, we haven't even seen a holiday schedule to post what holidays we want 1st, 2nd or 3rd. They get so wrapped up in sprucing the place up, making sure employees are up to date with all their inservices, too busy quizzing employees if they know where the fire extinguishers are, where the O2 shut off valves are located, and all that jazz to think about a holiday schedule. With them out of the way next week, I'm hoping there's one up by the end of next week...it would be nice.

[fcallicoat]

shoot I only work weekends because of child care. (I get to be at home during the week with my preschool aged children and my husband has them on weekends) but I better have off holidays that don't fall on weekends and I sure as heck can't come in at the last minute. And when you start offering inservices with qualified child care, I'll show up. I work an alternative schedule for my own reasons not to cover what other people have issues with. But it does mean that I miss birthday parties, movies, and all the things that most people do with their children and/or spouses on the weekend so I do count on my holidays.

[Nurse Ratched, RN]

Wow.

Happily child-free here; I do have lovely nieces/nephews I'd like to see more, but are unfortunately out of state. My business what I do on my scheduled holidays off - altho I frequently do volunteer to help co-workers who wish to be off with family. I often work for a great night nurse who likes to go to Florida to spend time with her parents at the holidays. I often wonder whether each year may be their last together, and know when she is free to do so, she will work for someone else.

I don't feel I have an obligation to do this just because I don't have kids, and if I choose to sit around and knit on Christmas (or have a kegger, however unlikely!) or do whatever, I certainly have that right as well, and will do so without the slightest bit of guilt.

I think we've all worked with at least one person who used their children as an excuse for why they should receive preferential scheduling treatment. I've worked with an equal number of young partying singles who call off regularly on weekends r/t late nights out. These folks are the fringes on each side and I've found most people fit comfortably in the middle.

[SmilingBluEyes]

I like the thread with the quote:

"I am not your village"

so true. Just cause someone elects to make babies does not make the childfree obligated to bend for their convenience. Kids/career. TOUGH BALANCE but you have made conscious decisions to have both. Unlike Gloria Steinham, I don't believe the LIE: "You can have it all".......

You can have it all, maybe, just not ALL AT ONCE...she forgot that important qualifier. I have kids but do not expect anyone to deal with them BUT me. I do my share; my name goes in the hat for all the undesireable/holiday shifts. No one owes me a thing but equal consideration NOT based upon my ability and desire to procreate.

It does not take a village to raise kids; just mature adults who know their obligations and limits and respect those of others, as well.

[tntrn, ASN, RN]

SmilingBlueEyes said, "Just cause someone elects to make babies does not make the childfree obligated to bend for their convenience."

You said a mouthful there! At our place the new moms who are also breastfeeding are the ONLY ones who get a break most days: to pump of course. While I respect their decision to feed their baby as they choose, I have never figured out how that translates to them getting a break, no questions asked, and the rest of us keep plugging away, taking care of our full load PLUS theirs while they are pumping. You can't have it all and you do need to decide early on which part you can do without.

[Hellllllo Nurse, BSN, RN]

Originally posted by SmilingBluEyes

I like the thread with the quote:

"I am not your village"

so true. Just cause someone elects to make babies does not make the childfree obligated to bend for their convenience. Kids/career. TOUGH BALANCE but you have made conscious decisions to have both. Unlike Gloria Steinham, I don't believe the LIE: "You can have it all".......

You can have it all, maybe, just not ALL AT ONCE...she forgot that important qualifier. I have kids but do not expect anyone to deal with them BUT me. I do my share; my name goes in the hat for all the undesireable/holiday shifts. No one owes me a thing but equal consideration NOT based upon my ability and desire to procreate.

It does not take a village to raise kids; just mature adults who know their obligations and limits and respect those of others, as well.

Another great post, SmilingBluEyes!

[txsugarlvn]

At one of my employers, they would post a list. Each nurse for the unit would write their choice in order of 1st, 2nd, 3rd and the DON would then assign the holidays. If you got Christmas one year, you couldn't have it the next year unless someone was willing to trade with your for New Year's Eve or Thanksgiving. We tried to be very fair. What we tried to do was talk to each other and work out which one we wanted most so we could write it out as we preferred it. The DON loved it because we all tried to be diplomatic about it.

I don't have children (yet) but I used to resent those who used the children as an excuse for leaving early,coming late, getting every weekend off, not working holidays. I can understand emergencies or special events or the like. The thing is, with nursing, you don't really get to pick and choose unless you work agency or per diem. Whether you have children or not shouldn't matter. I hope that when I finally do have children, I keep in mind not to use my children as an excuse for not wanting to work Christmas Day or the weekend. I'll just say "because I don't want to!" LOL....:)

On a side note, I had planned on moving back into nursing full time but I told my husband "not until after the holidays!" because I know as a newbie in a facility, I will get to work the holidays whole those with seniority take them off. Only fair! So, since I want my holidays (and where I work...insurance company) I get all of them including the day after each one, I'll wait it out. LOL!

[RNKPCE]

tntrn

Who is legally preventing you from taking a break? You shouldn't have to breastfeed to take a break. If you don't get a break do something about it. If you don't do something about it then don't complain. Breastfeeding or not everyone is entitled to their breaks.

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

Originally posted by tntrn

SmilingBlueEyes said, "Just cause someone elects to make babies does not make the childfree obligated to bend for their convenience."

You said a mouthful there! At our place the new moms who are also breastfeeding are the ONLY ones who get a break most days: to pump of course. While I respect their decision to feed their baby as they choose, I have never figured out how that translates to them getting a break, no questions asked, and the rest of us keep plugging away, taking care of our full load PLUS theirs while they are pumping. You can't have it all and you do need to decide early on which part you can do without.

When there's a will, there's a way. Just as breast pumpers and smokers find a way to take a break, you can too. Shame on you for not taking a break. But that's another thread. LOL