Being a SAHM after graduation

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I'm a first year nursing student in a traditional BSN program. My husband and I have been married a year & a half and currently have no children. Well... Except the dogs lol. I married young but he's a few years older. When I graduate, he will be almost 30. We're really wanting to start a family. I can't imagine anyone else raising my children since my mother stayed at home with me. I don't think my husband wants to wait long after graduation since we'll have been married 3 years. I don't want to wait either but I'm terrified I'll never be able to be hired when my kids go to school. Suggestions?

As far as jobs go, you work 3 days and home for 4. This also allows Daddy/child bonding time. As well as a possibility for the grandparents. After you do your year, you can work as a school nurse, who has the same schedule as her kids.

Just a quick note: since SO MANY parents want to work the same hours as their kids, school nursing is a VERY popular choice. Perhaps it's regional, but where I am, there's no way--and I mean ZERO--chance of someone with a year of experience landing a school nursing job! They are always looking for subs, that's true, but full-time employment ain't gonna happen. Once in a millenium, when a job opens, they have the ability to cherry-pick from people with eons of experience---and they do. Part-time isn't available around here, either; full-timers work full-time, anyone else is a sub that gets called in for the day, here and there.

Just food for thought.

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I guess I probably should've chose a more family oriented career but I enjoy it so much.

No, currently you enjoy your career of being a nursing student.

Nursing is not family oriented despite it being a traditionally female field.

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No, currently you enjoy your career of being a nursing student.

Nursing is not family oriented despite it being a traditionally female field.

Amen! Working on weekends and holidays that are traditionally enjoyed by families at home ain't no picnic, either :(

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Specializes in Cardiology, Cardiothoracic Surgical.

Plenty of women make this work. As others have said, finish school, get your license and your few years experience, and get creative with scheduling. My mom worked 3-11 when we were young, and my dad worked days (7-4ish), so we rarely saw daycare. I probably ate more boiled hot dogs and cabbage stew then I ever would care to in my lifetime, but at least one parent was there for all of our important stuff. They raised 4 self sufficient kids.

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Yeah I say get a year or so as a nurse ft and then you can have babies and work per diem or part time while you raise kids. I worked as a nurse apprentice while in nursing school ( after the first year of the nursing program) and full time for almost 6 months after graduation. I totally planned to work full time but surprise twins changed my plans. I continued part time and then realized per diem worked best for our family. I hold two per diem jobs at this time and raise 3 kids. I do sometimes feel a bit lacking in experience compared to some of my single co-graduates who worked full time and have a wide array of experience but I still have "my foot in the door" and I look forward to soon returning to nursing full time. Good luck!

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A lot of money and effort to spend to get your nursing degree and then not use it for an indefinite period of time. Get your degree work for a year, get pregnant then try to get a part time or per diem job. Even if you don't go back to work, one year experience is better than no experience. I worked 2-3, 8 hour shifts per week while my kids were young. Most of my friends were SAHM. I basically felt like I was a stay at home mom. I worked swing shift. My kids weren't in daycare. Grandma watched them 1-2 weekdays a week for 2 hours until my husband got home then he had primary responsibility while I was at work. For this reason I feel nursing is family friendly. Yes there are weekends and holidays but there are positives to non traditional work shifts too.

I agree that I liked the reassurance that I had a career in case my husband got laid off or something worse happened.

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Specializes in LTC, med/surg, hospice.

I work with several nurses who are PRN as in working the minimum of 24 hours a month (2 12s for example) and the rest of the time, SAHM and homeschooling.

BUT they worked as FT nurses for at least 2-3 years before making the change.

Another set of nurses were SAHM for several years..say birth until middle school and THEN decided to return to school for nursing and work FT.

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Specializes in Nurse Leader specializing in Labor & Delivery.

Another set of nurses were SAHM for several years..say birth until middle school and THEN decided to return to school for nursing and work FT.

That's kind of what I did - I was a WAHM until my (then) youngest was 4 or 5, then went back to school once she started a pre-K program.

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Specializes in Med-Surg, NICU.

My parents were a month shy of their eighth wedding anniversary before I was born. They were 29 and 30. They put off having kids to pursue careers and more education, which made finances much easier.

I would finish school and work a couple of years before even thinking about trying for a baby. Men can make babies until the day they die, and you are still young.

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I guess I don't see the point to spend all this time and money on a nursing degree (a very hands on field) if you are not even planning on working afterwards? I don't mean to sound mean but nursing school was so difficult. I can't imagine going through that torture to not use those skills. Plus, what about student loans? It is none of our business, but your husband would have to make a significant amt of money to cover all that on 1 income. Per diem is always a great option for mom's that want to be home more!

I got pregnant my 1st month working as an RN. I was working on a med/surg-rehab unit but I was able to get a school nurse job around 6 months pregnant. It's much more conducive to being a mom (i still work per diem at my old job too). I am also the breadwinner. Hubby is home with the baby during the day though so he is never in daycare. I kinda wish I could stay home.. i mean let's face it, it's nice to be home and not have to work, and have time to actually cook/clean, and I miss my baby. But I need the money, plus I'd feel so uneasy knowing I was losing all my skills. I'd suggest either leaving school now and going back later, OR considering a FT job at first... I mean you can work while pregnant. Then after baby is born drop to per diem or part time. That would probably be best to do because it's smart to have a backup plan in case something happens to your husband (that sound so mean lol but it's true!) That way you know you can always be self sufficient if need be.

Have babies if you want, I dont think you need to wait if you really dont want to, but consider not leaving the profession completely while still a new grad!!

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I like this idea. I was planning on the per dime thing anyway. I'll have to look into the opportunities for per diem work in Oklahoma. And for the one that says it's a waste, it's not! First, learning can never be a waste. Second, family CERTAINLY isn't a waste! I love nursing but I also love being a housewife. I'd love to use it eventually but I want a few years with my kids. I grew up in a traditional southern family and my mom stayed at home with us.

I've been a SAHM for 6 years now - my youngest is 3 and my oldest is 6 - and going to school now is the toughest, yet most rewarding thing I've done in a while. Being a mom is great; however, the sense of accomplishment with my school is like nothing I've encountered as a SAHM. (that said - I wouldn't trade my choices for anything - BUT I do wish I had decided to get my degree BEFORE juggling a family around getting it) There are many more things to think about when a lab gets changed or something changes my schedule - it isn't only my husband - I have a 6 year old who is waiting for me at school and a 3 year old at daycare. Having the school out of the way will be a burden lifted - even if you have to take a 'refresher' course - it won't be as long as the whole program - not to mention you can work p/t or try and work something out with your husband to keep your skills 'fresh'. It also leaves you both (you and your husband) a good 'fall back' plan - what if your husband loses his job? He can stay home - you can work. Get your degree before you have your babies - things have a way of falling into place. I wouldn't rush having babies - a few years is not going to change your ability to have children, but it will set you and your husband up to always have a stable foundation - and your foundation is what makes or breaks a marriage. Talk to your husband - tell him your worries, and know that he is the only one who can honestly 'level' with you on this one. Good Luck!

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Specializes in ICU.

Here is what I did. I started school before I was married. I got married when I was 23 and I quit school. Got pregnant when I was 29 and had my son at 30. I have been a SAHM since I was pregnant with him so in August it will be 9 years. Unfortunately my ex husband wasn't supportive of me getting a job and going to school. And when he started first grade, I really didn't know what to do with myself. I hate to clean all day and waiting on my ex hand and foot was not something I was going to do. So I got a divorce and went back to school. I am 38. I will graduate in May of 2016 and my son will be 10. He is so excited that I am going to school and going to be a nurse. I am still here for him as much as I ever was, none of that has changed. I am just doing something for myself now. In 10 years he will be off to college and I asked myself where I would be. If you want to stay home then do it while they are young. I would have kids now and go back to school later and finish my degree. I don't regret my path at all. I thoroughly enjoyed my years as a SAHM. But someday it won't all be about him anymore.

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