Being a SAHM after graduation

Nurses Career Support

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I'm a first year nursing student in a traditional BSN program. My husband and I have been married a year & a half and currently have no children. Well... Except the dogs lol. I married young but he's a few years older. When I graduate, he will be almost 30. We're really wanting to start a family. I can't imagine anyone else raising my children since my mother stayed at home with me. I don't think my husband wants to wait long after graduation since we'll have been married 3 years. I don't want to wait either but I'm terrified I'll never be able to be hired when my kids go to school. Suggestions?

Specializes in critical care.

Everyone has basically the same thoughts I do. Also, you wait a year after you start working, you get FMLA and it will be paid time off. You can spend that time reflecting on how much you want to work. Listen - being a stay a home mom can feel like a trap sometimes because you never get away from the kids. I love my littles with all of my heart, but because I never made excuses to get out and do things for myself, I never did get away from them, which led to a little bit of resentment. Get experience, get pregnant, drop down to per diem if you don't want to work full time. You say a more family friendly career, but with nursing being a 24-hour a day gig, it actually more family friendly when you think about it. Especially when the kids aren't in school yet.

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Specializes in Med-Surg, NICU.

I also want to add that I resent it when people imply that (full-time) working moms don't raise their kids. Daycare workers and sitters did not "raise" me...my hardworking mother did. I don't remember much of the time I spent in daycare but I cherish all the memories and lessons I have with my mother.

If she had relied on my father, we would have been screwed. Unfortunately, more and more people are getting a divorce and I find it unwise and naive to think divorce can't/won't happen to you.

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I also want to add that I resent it when people imply that (full-time) working moms don't raise their kids. Daycare workers and sitters did not "raise" me...my hardworking mother did.

I had to quote this because it is absolutely true. There is a terribly untrue stigma associated with the children of working mothers. My own personal pet peeve is when people put "stay at home wife & mom" as their career on Facebook. But, that is a rant for another thread :sarcastic:

To the OP, finish school. Work for a year or two. Have a baby. It is not the end of the world if he is over 30 when you have children. This will give you the chance to focus on school, make connections with a hospital, and eventually become PRN or part time there when you have kids.

Personally, I worked too damn hard for this degree to just "stop nursing" when I eventually have children. But that is me. If you would rather be a SAHM, your prerogative.

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I graduated in Jan. Had my first in Feb. Stayed home for a few months before going nuts and jumped into my first job in May. I work 24 hours a week, second shift and we have a sitter for a few hours between when I leave and when my husband gets home. I'm making some money, getting experience, and we are using as little childcare as possible. Look for part time or per diem work if you can so that you're still in the profession and gaining experience.

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Coming in late here, but here's what I would do: Get hired at a full time job and stay working full time until you have a baby. Then after the baby is born you can still work 1 shift a week or do PRN or per diem to keep up your credentials, and spend the rest of the time as a stay at home mom. I work part time and consider myself a stay at home mom who "moonlights' as a nurse. It supplements our income, allows me important time with other adults, and keeps my mind active. I know many nurses who do this, especially after having a baby they will often just do the minimum to keep their license, then as the kids get into school they step up the hours.

Also ask yourself-- what will you do if your husband loses his job or becomes disabled? It was something that as a SAHM I was terrified would happen and our family would have been ruined financially. I don't worry about that anymore. Best feeling in the world to know we can fall back on my job if needed.

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You need a year experience after graduation or you will be screwed. After that you can go PRN

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Specializes in NICU, Trauma, Oncology.
Everyone has basically the same thoughts I do. Also, you wait a year after you start working, you get FMLA and it will be paid time off. You can spend that time reflecting on how much you want to work. Listen - being a stay a home mom can feel like a trap sometimes because you never get away from the kids. I love my littles with all of my heart, but because I never made excuses to get out and do things for myself, I never did get away from them, which led to a little bit of resentment. Get experience, get pregnant, drop down to per diem if you don't want to work full time. You say a more family friendly career, but with nursing being a 24-hour a day gig, it actually more family friendly when you think about it. Especially when the kids aren't in school yet.

Just FYI fmla is not paid in several states.

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Specializes in critical care.
Just FYI fmla is not paid in several states.

Forgive me. I worded poorly. FMLA does not pay in any state. It only guarantees that there will be a job to come back to. Most employees of nurses allow for paid time off, and after that first year, there would likely be accrued time off, in addition to short term disability, which pays 66% for 6 weeks usually.

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