I'll make this as short and sweet as possible. I had really bad anxiety in nursing school, was diagnosed with panic attacks etc etc. Over the years I have grown a lot. Started working as a PCA and I went from shy bird to not so shy.
In school I was quiet, yes, but I still had friends and talked to them. I just was not the student who raised their hand up in class or was loud in clinical. I am very reserved and professional in professional settings and always get my work done.
I graduated this March. Failed nclex twice with 265 I honestly believe it was my anxiety combined with not doing enough practice nclex type questions. I finally passed this October my third time.
I began applying for jobs and reached out to a unit I really wanted to work on....I am a float PCA. Immediately got two interviews within days...was told I was going to get hired for my dream job but one more reference was needed from my clinical instructors or instructor.
They told me I had 3 days for my professor to submit the recommendation form so in desperate need to attain my dream job I emailed EVERYONE of my teachers...everyone ignored me or told me they were busy
Low and behold next day I get an email saying they decided to go with another candidate for the job....I apply to about 30 more jobs at my hospital and I was rejected to all automatically....I finally spoke to HR and the lady told me they wont be considering me for a RN position at all for a year until I get experience elsewhere BECAUSE A BAD RECOMMENDATION WAS GIVEN ABOUT ME BY A TEACHER WHO SHE COULDNT SAY WHO IT WAS....
Apparently this person expressed how much they were concerned about me being a "safe and competent" nurse. They also apparently said I would not take the initiative to care for my patients and I wouldnt be a good fit to be a nurse at this time....
SO APPARENTLY 4 YEARS AND 60K+ in debt instructors say this about me?
I also want to know how apparently I have a 3.3 GPA and never once failed out of clinical. Never once got a bad evaluation from a clinical instructor. Yet someone wants to say something bad about me NOW as a new grad and ruin my career and reputation? WHY? I cant express how much I hate nursing now...something I dreamed of doing since I was 7 years old. I cant express how depressed I am. How dumb I feel. How sad I am. How ashamed I feel. How embarrassed I am. I literally am not having the best thoughts right now. I want to just move out of this state and get away FAR AWAY.
I feel like I shouldnt have emailed everyone. I also shouldnt have stated that I got a position in the NICU (mostly NAS and GI problem babies NICU...no vents). I shouldnt have emailed out the forms as well. I feel like this person took advantage of me because the form had to be sent directly to HR so they knew I wouldnt see what they said or who sent it. Im deeply depressed. An entire hospital I was a PCA at for 3 years wont hire me. They said they take comments like that SERIOUS. They spoke with my current manager, looked at my transcripts, looked at me work evaluations and everything was good EXCEPT me failing nclex twice. The HR women said me failing twice with the bad comment was why they came up with that decision.
I am not loving life. Maybe I am not meant to be a nurse. Maybe I am not smart enough. I need somewhere to vent because I literally am about to lose my mind. The NICU was why I went into nursing. I remember going there as a child and I knew thats what I wanted to do...finally my dream was coming true and SOMEONE RUINED IT FOR ME. Help ): Where do I go from here. What do I do.........I worked at one of the best Peds hospitals...I wanted to stay in peds and now I am forced to go work else where..I have no choice...what if no one ever hires me?
LOL I love how the above negative people don't know who I am yet are claiming I am an unsafe nurse and lives are being saved. At this point I don't care what you guys think. I don't care if you actually believe I am an unsafe nurse. I know who I am. And I am well known by managers at my hospital. Sadly I was not allowed to use anyone who wasn't my professor as a reference. I came prepared to my interview. None of you were there with me. I obviously made a very good impression if I was chosen for the position over everyone else who applied. At this point I don't care what any of you negative people think of me. Haters gonna hate right? No one will be getting in the way of my dream. Even though this door has closed for me another will be open soon. I know I have good intentions. I love helping people. I would risk my life to help and save someone else's. All the positive feedback on this forum has truly helped me in addition to the support of my close friends I have. I love all the support and advice I was given. And best believe I will use it. You guys give me hope that there are good compassionate people in this world. The rest leaving negative comments.....I hope I don't have to work with people like you. Heart less insensitive people who bring people down during hard times. Instead of taking the time to write me a negative comment save it. I have lurked these boards for years now and I constantly see people attack each other. Stop being so catty. Life is too short. And sadly I enjoyed reading all your negative comments out loud with my friends and we had a great time talking about how pathetic your negative comments are. I asked for advice. I didn't ask for you to tell me that I am an unsafe nurse....why do you think that's ok to tell me when you don't know me? Do you think it will make me feel any lower than I already did? I believe in karma. And honestly I will leave it at that. I'm sure God will take care of things for me. He knows who has good intentions and a good heart. How do you people sleep at night?
Am I mad because you guys told me the truth and I'm offended like some of you stated? No I'm mad that there are unkind insensitive people in this world. Nurses like to eat their young. And I believe a lot of people forget what it's like to be a new grad nurse. To be in school. To take the nclex. I think a lot of you are forgetting the mistakes you have made in life. How you felt when someone put you down etc etc. I asked for advice and I got amazing advice and I will run with it. Thanks again to everyone...I truly am thankful. To all the negative people God Bless and I will no longer be reading comments nor commenting back on here so don't waste your negativity on me. I don't care if you find this comment to be rude at this point. I don't care what you think of me. I just gave you what you dished me. I'm tired of bitter people coming at people's neck in life. I'm tired of getting walked all over and never speaking up for myself because I actually have a heart and I realize people have feelings. I will soon be making a difference in people's lives every day and be more successful than any of the negative people out there including the person who prevented me from getting a job at a hospital. And as I love to always say BYE FELICIA! í ½í²…í ¼í¿¼í ½í±¸í ¼í¿½
LOL I love how the above negative people don't know who I am yet are claiming I am an unsafe nurse and lives are being saved. At this point I don't care what you guys think. I don't care if you actually believe I am an unsafe nurse. I know who I am. And I am well known by managers at my hospital. Sadly I was not allowed to use anyone who wasn't my professor as a reference. I came prepared to my interview. None of you were there with me. I obviously made a very good impression if I was chosen for the position over everyone else who applied. At this point I don't care what any of you negative people think of me. Haters gonna hate right? No one will be getting in the way of my dream. Even though this door has closed for me another will be open soon. I know I have good intentions. I love helping people. I would risk my life to help and save someone else's. All the positive feedback on this forum has truly helped me in addition to the support of my close friends I have. I love all the support and advice I was given. And best believe I will use it. You guys give me hope that there are good compassionate people in this world. The rest leaving negative comments.....I hope I don't have to work with people like you. Heart less insensitive people who bring people down during hard times. Instead of taking the time to write me a negative comment save it. I have lurked these boards for years now and I constantly see people attack each other. Stop being so catty. Life is too short. And sadly I enjoyed reading all your negative comments out loud with my friends and we had a great time talking about how pathetic your negative comments are. I asked for advice. I didn't ask for you to tell me that I am an unsafe nurse....why do you think that's ok to tell me when you don't know me? Do you think it will make me feel any lower than I already did? I believe in karma. And honestly I will leave it at that. I'm sure God will take care of things for me. He knows who has good intentions and a good heart. How do you people sleep at night?
Am I mad because you guys told me the truth and I'm offended like some of you stated? No I'm mad that there are unkind insensitive people in this world. Nurses like to eat their young. And I believe a lot of people forget what it's like to be a new grad nurse. To be in school. To take the nclex. I think a lot of you are forgetting the mistakes you have made in life. How you felt when someone put you down etc etc. I asked for advice and I got amazing advice and I will run with it. Thanks again to everyone...I truly am thankful. To all the negative people God Bless and I will no longer be reading comments nor commenting back on here so don't waste your negativity on me. I don't care if you find this comment to be rude at this point. I don't care what you think of me. I just gave you what you dished me. I'm tired of bitter people coming at people's neck in life. I'm tired of getting walked all over and never speaking up for myself because I actually have a heart and I realize people have feelings. I will soon be making a difference in people's lives every day and be more successful than any of the negative people out there including the person who prevented me from getting a job at a hospital. And as I love to always say BYE FELICIA! Ã*½Ã²…Ã*¼Ã¿¼Ã*½Ã±¸Ã*¼Ã¿½
Well, this was mature. If you only wanted to hear opinions that validated your feelings of persecution, why in the world did you post on an anonymous public board?
Nurses like to eat their young. I asked for advice and I got amazing advice and I will run with it.
Always with the NETY. And you got a lot of advice. Some you wanted to hear and some that you didn't. Please don't ever come to a message board and expect to be in your side and tell you exactly what you want to hear. There are people who will tell it to you straight. That doesn't mean they have no compassion. Sometimes the truth hurts.
Based on some of your responses, and the fact that you attempted the NCLEX more than once, waiting to secure your references, and sending multiple requests, I can see how one of your instructors may have felt that you are not ready for a critical care position right now.
Clearly, you are on the defensive and lack insight into why things transpired the way they have. Hopefully you will learn from this.
Funny, I'm still in school. Can't be a NETY from me. Haters gonna hate? I'm not hating, just trying to help. I was trying to actually save your career. I really was. I just don't blow rainbows and unicorns up your butt. You get a good dose of reality from me.
I think I'm the one that's going to say Bye Felicia here. It ain't my thread!!!
LOL I love how the above negative people don't know who I am yet are claiming I am an unsafe nurse and lives are being saved. At this point I don't care what you guys think. I don't care if you actually believe I am an unsafe nurse. I know who I am. And I am well known by managers at my hospital. Sadly I was not allowed to use anyone who wasn't my professor as a reference. I came prepared to my interview. None of you were there with me. I obviously made a very good impression if I was chosen for the position over everyone else who applied. At this point I don't care what any of you negative people think of me. Haters gonna hate right? No one will be getting in the way of my dream. Even though this door has closed for me another will be open soon. I know I have good intentions. I love helping people. I would risk my life to help and save someone else's. All the positive feedback on this forum has truly helped me in addition to the support of my close friends I have. I love all the support and advice I was given. And best believe I will use it. You guys give me hope that there are good compassionate people in this world. The rest leaving negative comments.....I hope I don't have to work with people like you. Heart less insensitive people who bring people down during hard times. Instead of taking the time to write me a negative comment save it. I have lurked these boards for years now and I constantly see people attack each other. Stop being so catty. Life is too short. And sadly I enjoyed reading all your negative comments out loud with my friends and we had a great time talking about how pathetic your negative comments are. I asked for advice. I didn't ask for you to tell me that I am an unsafe nurse....why do you think that's ok to tell me when you don't know me? Do you think it will make me feel any lower than I already did? I believe in karma. And honestly I will leave it at that. I'm sure God will take care of things for me. He knows who has good intentions and a good heart. How do you people sleep at night?
Am I mad because you guys told me the truth and I'm offended like some of you stated? No I'm mad that there are unkind insensitive people in this world. Nurses like to eat their young. And I believe a lot of people forget what it's like to be a new grad nurse. To be in school. To take the nclex. I think a lot of you are forgetting the mistakes you have made in life. How you felt when someone put you down etc etc. I asked for advice and I got amazing advice and I will run with it. Thanks again to everyone...I truly am thankful. To all the negative people God Bless and I will no longer be reading comments nor commenting back on here so don't waste your negativity on me. I don't care if you find this comment to be rude at this point. I don't care what you think of me. I just gave you what you dished me. I'm tired of bitter people coming at people's neck in life. I'm tired of getting walked all over and never speaking up for myself because I actually have a heart and I realize people have feelings. I will soon be making a difference in people's lives every day and be more successful than any of the negative people out there including the person who prevented me from getting a job at a hospital. And as I love to always say BYE FELICIA! ������������������������
Okay, so now we have some very good insight as to why one of your teachers gave you a scathing reference. You, in this post, pretty much validated his review.
The OP is seeking validation, not advice. Her instructors sensed this as we have. I don't provide references when asked unless I'm certain that I can provide a positive review. I would have declined the OP's request.
A lawyer may not be of great help. If they had cause, then their comments would not be unjust. There are nurses who do well in school but have too much anxiety for a certain type of floor. Suppose someone codes, will the anxiety prevent the nurse from acting?
I do know as well, that one can have good grades but not show initiative when it comes to care (when others are not around). WE don't know the story. WE don't know if the instructor saw something not being mentioned.
I would just like to calm a little of this illegal/slander talk. Know what you are talking about before you open your mouth. Slander can only occur when a lie is told about the person in question. If the person giving the reference said that the OP faild a clinical eval and she didn't that is slander. If they said she failed the NCLEX that is not slander because it is true.
Now a professional reference is asking about the opinion of another professional regarding the prospective employee. Opinion is a defense, against slander, recognized in nearly every jurisdiction. If the allegedly defamatory assertion is an expression of opinion rather than a statement of fact, defamation claims usually cannot be brought because opinions are inherently not falsifiable
I can absolutely see how this happened. I am not an instrictor of nursing, however I do teach CPR. Over the years I have had a few students who manage to meet all AHA requirements, but I do not believe them capable of actually performing in an emergency. I cannot refuse to issue a card to these people, they have passed the requirements of certification. If asked I will provide documentation to that effect. If asked my opinion of their abilities, I would express my misgivings.
But the slanderous part of this is that in fact the OP PASSED clinicals.
But the slanderous part of this is that in fact the OP PASSED clinicals.
The reference, as far as I understand, never stated OP didn't pass. But expressed their opinion that OP shouldn't get the job. The opinion can't be slander because it is subjective, and not falsifiable.
Thats where gathering the clinical evaluations and sending them to HR Is confusing to me. The issues is the opinion of the reference not that OP satisfied the requirements of the educational institute.
If I misread any of OPs posts and the person giving the reference did lie and say OP faild clinical please refer me to that post.
But the slanderous part of this is that in fact the OP PASSED clinicals.
There is no slander in this case. Per the OP's own story, the professor expressed concerns about the OP's ability to take initiative and perform as a competent nurse. The reference never said that she didn't pass clinicals. It is possible to do well enough to pass but still leave professors with reservations about one's abilities.
I did very well in nursing school. I was hired onto the floor I did my pediatric clinical and preceptorship on as a new grad. I am sure that my maternity instructor wouldn't have given me a stellar recommendation though. I more than passed her clinical but since I hated maternity (we spent most of the semester in post-partum which I found boring), I didn't stand out to her as someone stellar like I did in my Pedi clinical. Hence I would never have asked her for a reference.
Dreamscometru
19 Posts
LOL I love how the above negative people don't know who I am yet are claiming I am an unsafe nurse and lives are being saved. At this point I don't care what you guys think. I don't care if you actually believe I am an unsafe nurse. I know who I am. And I am well known by managers at my hospital. Sadly I was not allowed to use anyone who wasn't my professor as a reference. I came prepared to my interview. None of you were there with me. I obviously made a very good impression if I was chosen for the position over everyone else who applied. At this point I don't care what any of you negative people think of me. Haters gonna hate right? No one will be getting in the way of my dream. Even though this door has closed for me another will be open soon. I know I have good intentions. I love helping people. I would risk my life to help and save someone else's. All the positive feedback on this forum has truly helped me in addition to the support of my close friends I have. I love all the support and advice I was given. And best believe I will use it. You guys give me hope that there are good compassionate people in this world. The rest leaving negative comments.....I hope I don't have to work with people like you. Heart less insensitive people who bring people down during hard times. Instead of taking the time to write me a negative comment save it. I have lurked these boards for years now and I constantly see people attack each other. Stop being so catty. Life is too short. And sadly I enjoyed reading all your negative comments out loud with my friends and we had a great time talking about how pathetic your negative comments are. I asked for advice. I didn't ask for you to tell me that I am an unsafe nurse....why do you think that's ok to tell me when you don't know me? Do you think it will make me feel any lower than I already did? I believe in karma. And honestly I will leave it at that. I'm sure God will take care of things for me. He knows who has good intentions and a good heart. How do you people sleep at night?
Am I mad because you guys told me the truth and I'm offended like some of you stated? No I'm mad that there are unkind insensitive people in this world. Nurses like to eat their young. And I believe a lot of people forget what it's like to be a new grad nurse. To be in school. To take the nclex. I think a lot of you are forgetting the mistakes you have made in life. How you felt when someone put you down etc etc. I asked for advice and I got amazing advice and I will run with it. Thanks again to everyone...I truly am thankful. To all the negative people God Bless and I will no longer be reading comments nor commenting back on here so don't waste your negativity on me. I don't care if you find this comment to be rude at this point. I don't care what you think of me. I just gave you what you dished me. I'm tired of bitter people coming at people's neck in life. I'm tired of getting walked all over and never speaking up for myself because I actually have a heart and I realize people have feelings. I will soon be making a difference in people's lives every day and be more successful than any of the negative people out there including the person who prevented me from getting a job at a hospital. And as I love to always say BYE FELICIA! í ½í²…í ¼í¿¼í ½í±¸í ¼í¿½