Am I being bullied? Or is this normal?

[baymar67]

Hi, I am a new nurse working my first job in a hospital. (Volunteer career change at 46) I am on a monitored care unit with up to six patients. I feel like I am belittled by one co worker or another every time I go to work. I have been publicly reprimanded 3 times, by 3 different nurses, for things I didn't know I had to do. I've been laughed at and get the eye rolling by another nurse whenever I have to give her morning report. Been told " I can read" when going over the patient's history. There is so much more but this would be way to long. I'm so afraid to give report in the morning because I don't know what's going to be said to me. I try to prepare with labs, history and test results, but it never seems to be good enough. I'm still learning(I'm just starting my 2nd month on my own)and I'll get "did you do this? Did you do that?" And it's always something new and I've never been told I need to do. Then I can tell that the day nurse is totally disgusted with me for not knowing I had to do it. I always say "I'll do it now", but they say "forget it, I'll do it." I do ask questions of my team mates when I get something new, but they are busy too, and it seems like there is something left out. I am a very strong person but this experience has left me feeling like a failure. I would never treat anyone the way I've been treated. Thankfully I've had great experiences with my patient's and they are the reason I'm still there.

[BSNbeauty, BSN, RN]

This is not normal and this is horizontal violence. They are trying to intimidate you. You are a new nurse and it takes time to learn how to be a nurse. It is a shame that some nurses don't realize this and rather than help you they act like immature teenagers. I'm just so sick of it.

[nurse2033, MSN, RN]

Things that you "don't know you should have done" is a failing of your orientation. Do you have an educator? You might find a tactful way to explain you don't feel the orientation was sufficient. But the culture of demeaning is a larger issue that there may be no cure from. Do your best to find your way, but at the end of the day, be clear on what is legitimate or BS. Does your hospital have a set of defined professional behaviors (maybe Encore values or something similar)? It is up to you whether you want to fight the tide, put your head down and get along, or just find a new job. You should stay at least a year to establish yourself though. Good luck.

[OBigdog26, MSN, RN, NP]

Speak with one of your leadership team on how you feel like you're being treated.

This is just ridiculous! I can't stand it when nurses aren't willing to help and give negative criticism. Everyone is part of a team. If you didn't know, maybe those nurses need to enlighten you, instead of belittling you!

Sent from my iPhone using allnurses

[sistrmoon, BSN, RN]

I have experienced this(from mainly one nurse, and I'm not a new nurse either. Nothing was ever good enough. If you went out of your way on one thing she'd find something else you hadn't done or didn't know) and I went to my manager about it. You should as well. It's not acceptable.

[slimz101]

I've seen nurses belittle new nurses all the time and I hate it! Im almost a new nurses and that my fear. I don't want other experience nurses belittle me or talk and laugh at me

[Momma1RN, MSN, RN, APRN]

Not normal. Speak with your manager.

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

I am sorry you are experiencing this.

You are working in a hostile environment.It's a tie between lateral violence and "eating of the young". These nurses .. who should be continuing to mentor you.. are taking out their work frustrations on you.

Start documenting these occurrences. Inform your manager after you have several. Speak with your nursing educator also.

In the meantime...STOP trying to please these vultures. Give an SBAR report.. do not let them interrupt. At the end of report.. look them in the eye and say.. "is there any part of my report.. you did not understand?"

Feel free to PM me... we'll get through this.

[dudette10, MSN, RN]

Like someone else this thread, I think it's a failure of your orientation. Can you give us an example of something that you were supposed to do per the noc nurse, but you didn't because you were not aware it needed to be done?

[Bezoars]

This is so sad when nurses do this. I'm sorry you're experiencing that kind of hostility. Most of us have seen it and experienced it ourselves when we were new nurses so I know how you feel. Here's how I dealt with it. I did everything I knew to do, I made sure my report was complete, and when I would get the snarky comment like "what about the labs?" or "did you do THIS?", I simply stated, "I don't know, maybe you should look that up" or "I didn't know I was supposed to do that because I haven't been doing this that long, but I'll know better next time." When I inevetibly got the eye roll or next snarky comment about it, I just would reply something like "I'm sorry, but I'm new at this and I'm still in the learning process... any grace that you could extend to me would be greatly appreciated, since we've all been here".

Stand your ground. Get a thick skin, and don't let them intimidate you.

[tarotale]

you can take it to manager, but in the end, no one is going to truly speak for you except yourself. i had situations like that in the early days of career, you know, the older nurses trying to talk smack. all it took for me was clearly tell them that I don't appreciate the way they talk to me and kindly ask not to do that. believe it or not, they do stop.

of course, guaranteed there are some new nurses who are beyond the tolerable level of "dumbness", but that's pretty rare. bottom line, it starts from you telling them to p*ss off

[Mr. Murse]

As I've told many a new nurse and someone else has already said on here: stand your ground. If someone tries to belittle you for something you had never even been taught to do, don't apologize and validate their behavior, tell them, "hey, I'm still learning a whole lot of things here, and no one had told me that yet, I'd appreciate if you'd show me how to do it instead of belittling me". Be direct without being argumentative. In other words, tactfully and diplomatically call them out on their grade school attitudes. You're all adults, so don't let them get away with child like behavior at your expense.

My next question is what you did before nursing. Most people that go into nursing as a second career already have encountered jackasses in other lines of work and have a pretty good handle on how to deal with them.

Either way, being new does not mean you get to be treated as subhuman. You can demand respect without causing a fight.