Am I being bullied? Or is this normal?

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Hi, I am a new nurse working my first job in a hospital. (Volunteer career change at 46) I am on a monitored care unit with up to six patients. I feel like I am belittled by one co worker or another every time I go to work. I have been publicly reprimanded 3 times, by 3 different nurses, for things I didn't know I had to do. I've been laughed at and get the eye rolling by another nurse whenever I have to give her morning report. Been told " I can read" when going over the patient's history. There is so much more but this would be way to long. I'm so afraid to give report in the morning because I don't know what's going to be said to me. I try to prepare with labs, history and test results, but it never seems to be good enough. I'm still learning(I'm just starting my 2nd month on my own)and I'll get "did you do this? Did you do that?" And it's always something new and I've never been told I need to do. Then I can tell that the day nurse is totally disgusted with me for not knowing I had to do it. I always say "I'll do it now", but they say "forget it, I'll do it." I do ask questions of my team mates when I get something new, but they are busy too, and it seems like there is something left out. I am a very strong person but this experience has left me feeling like a failure. I would never treat anyone the way I've been treated. Thankfully I've had great experiences with my patient's and they are the reason I'm still there.

Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

I think it''s a shame that new grads are on their own at 8 weeks.

((HUGS)) I agree with been there done that....SBAR and out.

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Specializes in public health.

Are you being bullied? Yes? Is it normal? It's normal as in "common practice" in a lot of place but it's still not right to treat someone like that. You can fight back, tell your manager, confront your bullies, or quit the place. You shouldn't be treated like that by anyone regardless of ages, races, and gender, etc.

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Specializes in Nursing Professional Development.

I'm not sure "bullying" is the right word for it. "Bullying" suggests that people are out to get you and it is personal. That may be an exaggeration in this case, but I can't tell from the information in the original post. You might just be having a rough transition and interpreting the comments of tired, frustrated experienced nurses as being personal -- when in fact, they have little to do with you. Once that happens, you start to interpret everything that people say as negative and personal even when they don't mean it to be. For example, when the day shift people say they will take care of something for you, they may be trying to be nice -- not bullies -- but you interpret their offer of help as being mean.

Find someone you can talk to who knows the unit and the people involved in order to get a better sense of where you stand with this group. Is there an Unit Educator, former preceptor, or manager that you can talk to? Are there any experienced nurses who you feel comfortable with enough to sit down and talk to? Get their insight to get a more objective opinion.

It might be that you are being bullied ... but you also might be simply going through a rough patch of your career and all stressed out enough to be a little hypersensitive to any comments that are not totally supportive. Both the phenomenon of Transition Shock and Reality Shock tend to hit new grads at your stage of development: most people experience them to some degree. Those well-documented phenomena are likely to be adding to your stress right now and making it harder for you to cope with any unpleasantness at work, making it seem worse than it really is. An objective opinion from someone in a position to know you and your work environment would be helpful.

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Specializes in Hospice / Psych / RNAC.

I have worked long enough to have encountered both situations. I don't think it has so much to do with you being a new nurse as it does a new staff member. Of course, it was when I was a new nurse that I got the exact same person (you described to an exact T) that would send me into an absolute panic before having to give report.

As I grew and got a few years under my belt I found I didn't run into this behavior as much, but when I did I could recognize it, be ready for it, and deal with it in an appropriate matter.

When all is said and done it comes down to the staff. If they are a happy staff and treated well than it's g. When moral is low and management unfair than the staff's behavior reflects it and than you just have your typical class A bully :devil:.

You should go talk to your DON/boss/etc...but I would first approach the person doing this and ask if they are aware of their behavior's effect on you. I know, stiff upper lip and all that.

Good luck to you and know that all will be fine...eventually :)

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I had a similar experience with a couple night nurses when giving report. The tone in their voice, their eye rolls,their sighs, kept suggesting that I was incompetent, and then they would nitpick report to death and if something wasnt done because there simply was no time, then they would behave like it was the end of the world. I learned that they did this to other newer nurses as well, and that the fact of the matter was they were too lazy to look things up in the chart themselves... after learning from other night nurses that they would be watching netflix all night ,after drilling me to death in report. If they give you attitude in the future about something not done, tell them its a 24 hour a day job, have a great night!

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I remember this when I was a new nurse. It was degrading and I hated it. Like you I started to feel anxious when giving report. I learned to use a report form for myself to have all the info that was needed or would be asked. The SBAR is a great format, you can google it. There are bullies no matter where you go, and unfortunately these other women are bullies and will have to be faced. For being in nursing only 2 months you are doing well to be able to recognize this type of behavior!! I would do as one of the previous posts, keep a personal notation of what is being said by who and then when it is enough (4-5) occurances, I would take it to the manager and tell her exactly what is occurring. It does seem when working with females there is a pecking order and you being the new nurse are up for grabs. Stay strong, maintain your cool. Learn what you can and if they are asking multiple questions I would refer them to the patient's chart. You just need to give a brief update from what happened the prior shifts, brief pt history and what is pertinent. You are still learning and it does take time to learn how to streamline all the information. Good Luck, hang in there!! And yes, I find there are a lot of "highschool" type behaviors from those 20-30 years younger than myself.

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I totally understand where you're coming from! I'm a new nurse (been at my job for 4 months this week). I'm on straight nights in LTC, which means I always end up giving report in the morning to the day nurse, the director of care, and occasionally the director of nursing, if she has the time. Report is the only part of the job that still intimidates me because the first couple months I felt like all I was getting from the day RN and DOC was "Why didn't you do this?", "Have you done this? Why Not?", both of them full of attitude and judgmental looks. A lot of the time, I was the one being hassled because someone on evenings either forgot to do something, or forgot to tell me to pass something on in the morning. Being on nights, I'm the only nurse between 11pm-7am, and have nobody to ask questions to until the morning, but my questions often needed answers well before the day shift arrived. However, I will say that it has gotten significantly better! Like a lot of people are saying, if there is a manager or someone you can go to, I would talk to them. Good Luck!!!!

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In every workplace there is a whole list of "unwritten rules". Nobody actually tells the new nurse the unwritten rules, but what you are experiencing might be friction where the new grad is learning them.

When I was new, I learned the unwritten rules the hard way: don't leave nearly empty IV bags for the next shift. Strictly enforce visitor rules, and what to include in report and how long it should take.

After a few weeks on your own, see if the situation improves.

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Thank you everyone for your words of encouragement! To answer a few questions; I was a customer service team lead for 15 years before this. I knew the job very well and always treated my reps I was working with, with respect and professionalism. This may be why I'm having a hard time accepting this behavior I'm getting. I don't want to lower myself to their level but I am going to stand up for myself. The one thing I was yelled at for was stopping a heparin drip and 6:30 am and not calling the doctor right away to get a new order. I never had one heparin drip on orientation. I was going to call the Dr but then the morning nurse wanted report. I told her this and she went off on me calling me incompetent. Another nurse did say something to her about educating me and not yelling. My manager was aware of this incident because she asked me what happened. I didn't tell her she yelled at me in front of other nurses and that she called me incompetent. I told her I learned from it( though I'm sure someone told her). The other things I was belittled for were not faxing a form to dialysis, for a patient that was going to have dialysis that day(new to me), giving said patient her blood pressure med at 7 am before dialysis as the order stated. I asked another nurse if i should give it because we didn't know what time she was going and she said now.(she went at 8:30). The nurse coming on said I shouldn't of given it until dialysis called with a time. Not knowing to restart fluids for a patient going to have a colonoscopy, not hanging new med sheets in the patient's room when no meds had changed,

And not putting a new admits chart together. I know all of these things now and I do take them as learning experiences I just think the delivery of the message is demeaning. I am documenting the incidence now and do plan on talking to our nurse educator to go over protocols. I want to be a good nurse and make sure my patient's are safe and we'll taken care of. I'm just afraid my health is suffering from all the stress but I'm the one who needs to stop it, one way or another.

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Specializes in Inpatient Oncology/Public Health.
I had a similar experience with a couple night nurses when giving report. The tone in their voice, their eye rolls,their sighs, kept suggesting that I was incompetent, and then they would nitpick report to death and if something wasnt done because there simply was no time, then they would behave like it was the end of the world. I learned that they did this to other newer nurses as well, and that the fact of the matter was they were too lazy to look things up in the chart themselves... after learning from other night nurses that they would be watching netflix all night ,after drilling me to death in report. If they give you attitude in the future about something not done, tell them its a 24 hour a day job, have a great night!

Where is this job where I can watch Netflix all night? I'm running all night:)

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Thanks. I completely agree. One if our hospitals core values is "do unto others as you would have them do unto you". This was one of the reason I wanted to work there.

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Oh boy-been there, done that- your absolutely right! I have let them get away with this crap but not anymore I've been given this advice from other nurses which are not on my floor. Almost every nurse that has to float to my floor, hates doing so. We have a reputation of having B!^$#* nurses. It's so sad!

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