I am writing this totally heart broken and at my wits end.
I started my career as a nurse receiving compliments on what a good job I did. I felt that I was one of those people that had to do my job well and couldn't settle for any less. I had to chart well and provide the care that patients and families were more than satisfied with. They had to know they could count on me and that I was going to be there for them.
After 15 years and multiple hospital settings I have come to realize that it doesn't matter. Over the years, I have witnessed that many of hte units are run by managers and assistant managers that couldn't handle floor nursing and yet their demands on their employees are unrealistic. The people that they choose to be in charge and manage the floor are picked based on friendship and loyalty rather than hard work.
I have worked side by side with techs who run the unit and force nurses to do their work while they find time to sit on the internet or phone and then get out on time while we are stuck over finishing our work. I have walked into many patients rooms to pass pills only to find they had no water, haven't been turned or need urine emptied from urinals or pans that are overflowing. I can't tell you how many pans I have see stained with urine or feces because they don't get rinsed. How often patients are tied up in lines and cords.
I find myself picking up the slack and doing all of the jobs that countless others do not. Why can't people untangle lines? Why aren't pans rinsed from urine or feces? Why won't the techs do tech jobs and make sure people have water or that other needs are met?
In the end, what you get is punished. Punished because you couldn't get your work done. Punished because you couldn't meet everyone's needs and a patient or family felt you took too long to get to them and there was nothing you could say or do to make it right when you knew in your heart that it wasn't your fault. Instead, the blame is on the fact that there is too much for you to do or there is a major imbalance of productivity amongst workers.
The reason for the nursing shortage? Overworked and not appreciated and abused. You can't stick up for yourself, you can't tell them why you couldn't get things done - you can't say nothing. 15 years and nothing to show for it. I have tried nearly every hospital around and I find the negative complainers and the staff that knows how to socialize are the people that are respected and appreciated. It's not about the people that are out there busting their tails. Everyone knows there is a shortage and why but no one does anything and the biggest culprits are the administrators of the hospitals. The majority of those couldn't handle floor nursing or hardly ever experienced it at all.
I leave behind a lot of families and patients that thought I was a great nurse. But when you can't please one in a hundred or more you are a bad nurse. People don't understand the level of demands on a nurse. It is a downright abusive field with little to no appreciation surrounded by many people who are disappointed with their jobs and their choice in the career.
My final blow: After 3 years of sweating to please my last employer and taking the abuse of never hearing anything good - only bad. I went back to agency and went back to a hospital that I worked at 3 years ago. I knew that this hospital had a bad reputation for poor bedside care. Half the staff of any unit could easily be float and agency. The regular staff on the floor was made up of mostly young girls in tight spandex and inviting clothes working on socializing with doctors and hanging out at the desk all day long. Call lights were on non-stop but these girls would not answer them. The techs were busting their tails here. The agency nurses were working but the in house floats were sitting and socializing too. I ended up with a patient with a very bad attitude that was a complainer and law-suit happy. She was furious that for 4 days not one person followed through with obtaining her records from another hospital. It fell on me. I also had a patient admitted with respiratory distress which she shared a room with and could see I was busy. With her personality, she was angry at the moaning of the elderly lady who couldn't breath and was determined to get me to stop and cater to her to get on those records. When I got my respiratory patient stablized, I did just that. Turns out that the other hospital never received any fax requesting the information. This lady hated every person she had contact with at that hospital and wanted to call an agency to get them shut down. I'm sure you know the type by now. So....guess what. I was told today that I was not welcome back because of her complaint. I would literally pull a chair up and sit next to this lady and let her vent. I gave her my heart and I got booted. The nurse that she had the next day was a guy that sat around socializing and didn't care one bit about her. He was regular staff and he was NOT going to go out of his way. They all get to keep their jobs but the nurse that took the time out to take care of her is out the door.
I need a job or I wouldn't take the abuse. But, I know for a fact that this hospital is never going to get it. They were like that 3 years ago and now they have more floats and more agency staffing them. This is a big and reputable hospital.
The hospital I worked at for 3 years was dumping more and more tasks on the nurses and they were all unhappy and complaining. We lost good hard working techs and they were replaced with people who didn't want to work or nursing students who were tired when they came to work and were kicking their feet up taking it easy. Management loved those people.
I suffer from spinal degeneration and pain and I never get to sit down. My job is harder because they are not pulling their weight.
There is nothing left. I still owe for my loan and I am scared to death to take another nursing job. I know it is not going to be any different. I hurt. I lost my insurance and after all that I worked for I have nothing to show for it but bills and a destroyed ego and heart. I feel as though I am the misfit. I am the one who isn't right. I am wrong. I can't even bring myself to waste time on another application since I don't want anything to do with this career any more. I am going to lose my home, my vehicle and everything else.
I have noticed that the field is being taken over by young graduates who are more worried about looking sexy and socializing than working. Patient satisfaction has gone down the tubes and the senior skilled nurses are getting nowhere in this field. There is nothing anyone can do. We all know it is happening but we can't do anything about it.
Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.
I am writing this totally heart broken and at my wits end.
I started my career as a nurse receiving compliments on what a good job I did. I felt that I was one of those people that had to do my job well and couldn't settle for any less. I had to chart well and provide the care that patients and families were more than satisfied with. They had to know they could count on me and that I was going to be there for them.
After 15 years and multiple hospital settings I have come to realize that it doesn't matter. Over the years, I have witnessed that many of hte units are run by managers and assistant managers that couldn't handle floor nursing and yet their demands on their employees are unrealistic. The people that they choose to be in charge and manage the floor are picked based on friendship and loyalty rather than hard work.
I have worked side by side with techs who run the unit and force nurses to do their work while they find time to sit on the internet or phone and then get out on time while we are stuck over finishing our work. I have walked into many patients rooms to pass pills only to find they had no water, haven't been turned or need urine emptied from urinals or pans that are overflowing. I can't tell you how many pans I have see stained with urine or feces because they don't get rinsed. How often patients are tied up in lines and cords.
I find myself picking up the slack and doing all of the jobs that countless others do not. Why can't people untangle lines? Why aren't pans rinsed from urine or feces? Why won't the techs do tech jobs and make sure people have water or that other needs are met?
In the end, what you get is punished. Punished because you couldn't get your work done. Punished because you couldn't meet everyone's needs and a patient or family felt you took too long to get to them and there was nothing you could say or do to make it right when you knew in your heart that it wasn't your fault. Instead, the blame is on the fact that there is too much for you to do or there is a major imbalance of productivity amongst workers.
The reason for the nursing shortage? Overworked and not appreciated and abused. You can't stick up for yourself, you can't tell them why you couldn't get things done - you can't say nothing. 15 years and nothing to show for it. I have tried nearly every hospital around and I find the negative complainers and the staff that knows how to socialize are the people that are respected and appreciated. It's not about the people that are out there busting their tails. Everyone knows there is a shortage and why but no one does anything and the biggest culprits are the administrators of the hospitals. The majority of those couldn't handle floor nursing or hardly ever experienced it at all.
I leave behind a lot of families and patients that thought I was a great nurse. But when you can't please one in a hundred or more you are a bad nurse. People don't understand the level of demands on a nurse. It is a downright abusive field with little to no appreciation surrounded by many people who are disappointed with their jobs and their choice in the career.
My final blow: After 3 years of sweating to please my last employer and taking the abuse of never hearing anything good - only bad. I went back to agency and went back to a hospital that I worked at 3 years ago. I knew that this hospital had a bad reputation for poor bedside care. Half the staff of any unit could easily be float and agency. The regular staff on the floor was made up of mostly young girls in tight spandex and inviting clothes working on socializing with doctors and hanging out at the desk all day long. Call lights were on non-stop but these girls would not answer them. The techs were busting their tails here. The agency nurses were working but the in house floats were sitting and socializing too. I ended up with a patient with a very bad attitude that was a complainer and law-suit happy. She was furious that for 4 days not one person followed through with obtaining her records from another hospital. It fell on me. I also had a patient admitted with respiratory distress which she shared a room with and could see I was busy. With her personality, she was angry at the moaning of the elderly lady who couldn't breath and was determined to get me to stop and cater to her to get on those records. When I got my respiratory patient stablized, I did just that. Turns out that the other hospital never received any fax requesting the information. This lady hated every person she had contact with at that hospital and wanted to call an agency to get them shut down. I'm sure you know the type by now. So....guess what. I was told today that I was not welcome back because of her complaint. I would literally pull a chair up and sit next to this lady and let her vent. I gave her my heart and I got booted. The nurse that she had the next day was a guy that sat around socializing and didn't care one bit about her. He was regular staff and he was NOT going to go out of his way. They all get to keep their jobs but the nurse that took the time out to take care of her is out the door.
I need a job or I wouldn't take the abuse. But, I know for a fact that this hospital is never going to get it. They were like that 3 years ago and now they have more floats and more agency staffing them. This is a big and reputable hospital.
The hospital I worked at for 3 years was dumping more and more tasks on the nurses and they were all unhappy and complaining. We lost good hard working techs and they were replaced with people who didn't want to work or nursing students who were tired when they came to work and were kicking their feet up taking it easy. Management loved those people.
I suffer from spinal degeneration and pain and I never get to sit down. My job is harder because they are not pulling their weight.
There is nothing left. I still owe for my loan and I am scared to death to take another nursing job. I know it is not going to be any different. I hurt. I lost my insurance and after all that I worked for I have nothing to show for it but bills and a destroyed ego and heart. I feel as though I am the misfit. I am the one who isn't right. I am wrong. I can't even bring myself to waste time on another application since I don't want anything to do with this career any more. I am going to lose my home, my vehicle and everything else.
I have noticed that the field is being taken over by young graduates who are more worried about looking sexy and socializing than working. Patient satisfaction has gone down the tubes and the senior skilled nurses are getting nowhere in this field. There is nothing anyone can do. We all know it is happening but we can't do anything about it.
I am totally defeated and hopeless.
My goodness............did we work at the same hospital??
Please believe me, there is more to life---and nursing---than hospital work. It doesn't have to be like that. It truly doesn't. You may have to do some research into other types of nursing, and you will definitely want to check out the credentials of any company to which you might apply. But even though you are where I was two and a half years ago---your physical and mental anguish are palpable, even in as anonymous a venue as the Internet---you CAN find a nursing position where you are treated as a professional and given the respect you deserve. You just have to look beyond the traditional.
I hope you will hang in there and stick with us........we haven't a nurse to waste. :heartbeat
I think you read my mind. I am getting just as bitter as you are and with good reason. But I am not going to be broke, or have no insurance, or lose my security! I am going to work tomorrow, smile at the beeches, treat the patients like how I want to be treated and most important, remember that "God is watching me". I can not do any less than he expects. I am a good nurse ( no matter what the few beeches say) and I will save my money and get a new plan. I will kiss a$$ until I can kick it!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dont let them make you struggle financially, "just smile and wave"
I too am considering leaving the nursing profession as well. I have had a rough day, had enough of being told i'm too slow, being expected to work at breakneck speed and worried the whole time that something is going to go wrong because theres no enough time to do things properly (i'm working in day surgery). I'm sick to death of the same old BS wherever i go and management doing nothing. I'm tired of nurses being expected to be constantly advocating for our patients, yet not allowed to advocate for ourselves.
I'm on the road to burnout. I have warned the senior nurses what i'm going though and their answer seems to be putting me in the most stressful theatres. Maybe they just want to hurry the process along
I have been in the mental place that you are in now and I know it is beyond awful.
It feels like the entire world is just skewed and distorted- the good and hard-working are punished, the bad and lazy are rewarded. Like your life is a whirling, out of control episode of the Twilight Zone.
I know that when I was in that place, I was so down-trodden and suspicious of everything and everyone- I felt so vulnerable- that even if a great job came a long, I don't think I would have been able to recognize it, or even handle it.
I wanted to hope, but I was too afraid, too worn-out, and too unable to deal with another bitter disappointment to hope.
I know that I was starting to question myself- thinking the world cannot be this screwed up -it must be me.
I really do not think now is the time for you to find another job in nursing.
If you are able to take time off and not work, I think that would be very beneficial to you. If not, you could take a temp, non-nursing job. A temp agency is a good place to find a non-nursing job.
If you applied for a permanent non-nursing job, it would be difficult to get hired- employers would think you are over-qualified and "She'll just leave in a couple of months for a nursing job."
A temp agency may not think this way, because the assignments are temporary. I have had temp jobs doing menial, light factory work. You don't have to think, you barely have to speak to people. You don't have to be "on" and in the super-alert state that nursing requires.
Also, in a job like this, you do not have to deal with the public. You can take one brief, temporary assignment after another- this way, you won't get involved in any job bs.
I am not going to say "try home health, try a doc's office, blah blah blah."
I may be way off base here, but in my mind, I imagine you just cringing at these suggestions, thinking "No, no, it will just be more of the same, it will be a little different, but basically the same- it's not the type of nursing, it's nursing itself"
From reading your posts, I have the impression that to force yourself to look for another nursing job would be a herculean effort at this point. You would be forcing yourself to try and get jobs that you don't even want.
Nursing is hurting you right now- it's toxic. I know that there have been times that this has been true for me.
I have no more suggestions. I can only offer you understanding, validation, and acknowledgment.
Specializes in med/surg, cardiology, advanced care.
I really feel your pain and agree with you 110%. I have often thought of filing bankruptcy and losing my home because I too am worn out and can't take anymore. You are not alone. I'll keep you in my thought and prayers.
I am sooo sorry that you are going through this. It sounds awful. It also sounds like you may be depressed and can't see yourself through this situation. Nursing is SUCH a diverse and varied career that you can certainly find an area where that will give you what you clearly deserve.
I want to thank you for doing such an awesome job and for caring so much about your job. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the good work that you did and do with your patients has made an impact on their lives. One good nurse stands out in people's minds after being in a stressful situation like being hospitalized. Unfortunately, one doesn't realize that those good works do live on with the people we have touched. Please try to let that in, and to allow yourself to feel empowered from all the energy and care you put into your job. It does matter. There is no doubt. It really is the only thing that matters in the end.
What I have done to get through difficult times is to get myself into therapy. It soooo helps to have a trained professional to be on your side, hear your individual story, listen and validate your feelings and help you move on with what's next. I would highly recommend it.
Keep on expressing your feelings. Please let yourself believe that you make a difference and use this community as much as you need. There are always others who understand!!!
So sorry to hear of your situation. I have felt the same way many times. The teamwork in nursing has eroded to a large extent over the 20 years I have been a nurse. A lot of the joy of nursing has been taken away by ridiculous regs, crazy documentation, rude familes, and penny pinching institutions.
Specializes in ICU of all kinds, CVICU, Cath Lab, ER..
I completely sympathize with everything you have said. I left the hospital the other morning in tears.
Briefly, I volunteered for a 12 hour shift that NO ONE else would take. I thought I could handle it; suffice it to say - I was wrong, wrong, wrong.
My good work was not appreciated; it was roundly criticized by the oncoming shift (including making up a complaint - a bald faced lie) and when I called and spoke to the unit manager she called me a LIAR!!!!
They had changed procedures and how was I to know that?? The NP put her arm around me to "comfort" me - she was the witch who called the manager to complain about me!
The patients were safe; their needs were met - their meds given; my paperwork was pulled out of my hand and I was literally patted on the head and chased out the door.
I am, fortunately, being backed 100% by my area manager. I don't feel like going back to work but I will. I will prevail. I will outlast. I will survive . You will too - figure out what you need to do for you and make a plan. We will be here for you. God bless.
Specializes in Critical Care; Cardiac; Professional Development.
Wow. I am headed into nursing school at 37 years of age after losing a child to cancer. I can assure you no part of me is concerned with looking "sexy" in my career.
It sounds like I would be better off shooting myself than becoming a nurse. Maybe in 15 years in the field I will see things your way but I really hope not. The nurses that cared for my son were amazing and I can't wait to affect people's lives the way they affected mine. Even though he died, I am still so grateful to the men and women that helped us through that horrible ordeal.
I refuse to believe its all bad and refuse to believe I can't make a difference. And I don't think that all new nurses want to flirt and look sexy and not work.
I could have written your story many times, so I give you my complete sympathy and understanding. I know it is easy to say "take some time off" but when the bills roll in, someone has to pay them. I do not have an answer for you, just sincere prayers that He will give you a new strength and understanding for your trials. Blessings to you from my heart.
I am going to work tomorrow, smile at the beeches, treat the patients like how I want to be treated and most important, remember that "God is watching me". I can not do any less than he expects. I am a good nurse ( no matter what the few beeches say) and I will save my money and get a new plan. I will kiss a$$ until I can kick it!!!!!!!!!!!! 
:yeah::yeah:keep on keepin on!!!
VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN
22 Articles; 9,996 Posts
My goodness............did we work at the same hospital??
Please believe me, there is more to life---and nursing---than hospital work. It doesn't have to be like that. It truly doesn't. You may have to do some research into other types of nursing, and you will definitely want to check out the credentials of any company to which you might apply. But even though you are where I was two and a half years ago---your physical and mental anguish are palpable, even in as anonymous a venue as the Internet---you CAN find a nursing position where you are treated as a professional and given the respect you deserve. You just have to look beyond the traditional.
I hope you will hang in there and stick with us........we haven't a nurse to waste. :heartbeat