Dating Coworkers

Nurses Relations

Published

*GASP!* Say it ain't so!

No, really. What's your take on it?

Some have a golden rule: don't do it. Other coworkers are married to each other.

I had a bad experience asking a coworker out in the past, BUT, in hindsight, it turns out she's seven shades of crazy. According to her friends she's crazy (more than usual ladies[i KID, I KID!!!])

So I've got this other lady I'm working with. A fellow CNA. Wonderful, friendly, silly, sweet personality. Usually wants to talk with me, wants me to talk with her after work about how my day went. Has a habit of bumping/walking into me at least four times, and sometimes I don't think it's on accident. She's goofy, and keeps tapping my side/arms, and frequently pulls me over to show me whats on her phone. She's making beautiful jewelry made of resin and the shedded skin of her lizard (it's actually quite nice-looking).

I'm a big, muscular-y guy into working out and nursing. And I'm shy as all hell. What holds me back is the apprehension of dating a coworker. I'm cool, but I have no flipping idea how a coworker would react if we dated but, say, it went south. She has such a pretty soul (which is what I find attractive), but I don't know if I should take the risk. If she said yes and doesn't behave psycho (I have seen people attacked with plates), then that would be awesome. With all this working out I don't feel scared of asking her: just worried what could happen.

Need to hear your take on this please.

Jensmom7, BSN, RN

1,907 Posts

Specializes in Hospice.

Well, my husband and I worked at the same hospital, but not in the same department, and he's not a healthcare worker (he worked in General Stores). We'll be married 33 years this August.

In general it's not a good idea to get involved with someone you work with. Definitely not someone in the same department.

Yeah it worked for us but if we hadn't stayed together it could have been awkward. We worked at a small community hospital and your business tended to be everyone's business.

We were very circumspect, matter of fact there were people who really weren't aware we were a couple until after we got married.

So, just be careful. You are right to have reservations about what could happen if it doesn't work.

loriangel14, RN

6,931 Posts

Specializes in Acute Care, Rehab, Palliative.

I have seen it work as long as long as both parties act like adults. I wouldn't pass up a chance to be happy.

Specializes in Flight Nursing, Emergency, Forensics, SANE, Trauma.

I work with a bunch of couples. It actually kind of annoying. I mean do what makes you happy but please just don't suck face at the nurses' station.

heron, ASN, RN

4,136 Posts

Specializes in Hospice.
I work with a bunch of couples. It actually kind of annoying. I mean do what makes you happy but please just don't suck face at the nurses' station.

Or in the med room, the breakroom, the linen closet or empty patient rooms. Boundaries are a good thing.

OrganizedChaos, LVN

1 Article; 6,883 Posts

Specializes in M/S, LTC, Corrections, PDN & drug rehab.
I have seen it work as long as long as both parties act like adults. I wouldn't pass up a chance to be happy.

This. Be adults about it. Don't bring drama or PDA to work. As long as you can do that, I don't see why you couldn't date a coworker. If you or the other person can't, then don't do it. Because it will only lead to trouble down the road.

O9eleven

88 Posts

Unfortunately trying not get caught showing affection is what makes the whole situation exciting at work and outside work the excitement fizzles out. Good luck if you decide to ask the girl out.

AmeliasAunt

101 Posts

Don't crap where you eat.

kbrn2002, ADN, RN

3,820 Posts

Specializes in Geriatrics, Dialysis.

I won't lie to you, I have seen things go bad and get very awkward afterwards more often than I have seen a happily ever after. But if you can both be adult about it and keep work at work and fun at home your odds are better of at least being able to work together if for some reason the relationship doesn't last. Not to mention if you conduct your personal relationship away from work you will not annoy your coworkers with it and will minimize the chances of being the topic of the day for the gossip mill. If you really think you might like this girl, go ahead and ask her out and see where it leads.

springchick1, ADN, RN

1 Article; 1,769 Posts

We had two coworkers that were dating and no one even knew they were together until they got engaged. They kept it very professional at work.

Ruby Vee, BSN

17 Articles; 14,030 Posts

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.

If it goes south, there may be issues at work. But I'm hardly one to judge. My husband and I were coworkers in the SICU when we started dating. It's worked out well for us!

dishes, BSN, RN

3,950 Posts

Check with your human resources policies in regards to employees who are relationships working together, in some places couples cannot work on the same unit. If there isn't a policy and couples can work together, something else to consider, if during working hours you are in a position to be her superior and delegate tasks to her, your relationship may have imbalance of power.

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