Gay male nurse concern about male patient care - Page 2Register Today!
- Dec 27, '12 by Devon RexThanks for your responses thus far! I'm not flamboyant, but some people are able to tell without asking. I am respectful, very discreet, and have been very professional my whole life. I have a few straight male friends who used to be homophobes and I've earned their respect.
I feel more confident now after reading your comments. Thanks !!
- Dec 28, '12 by Red35Honestly who cares? If you are a professional and are a caring person-why do I care what your sexuality is? Plus if a patient asks you...you tell them you do not discuss your personal life.
As long as you act professional and do a good job..that's all people usually want.
Someone's sexuality is PART of a person not the focus of a person.
- Dec 28, '12 by nursel56I'm not a guy but I still want to welcome you to the ranks. I'm not sure how your patients may know or suspect you are gay, but from experience I would say to relax and be yourself. If anyone asks you point-blank you can deflect the reply or be honest if the person is just curious, but it really isn't any of their business. Best wishes to you.
- Dec 28, '12 by MN-NurseQuote from Devon RexAll patients are different. Some male patients don't want a female patient, others don't want a male. Some don't want a gay nurse, some may want a gay nurse.Hello everyone!
I will be joining the nursing workforce in a couple of months specializing in urological needs (I am not going into med/surg). As a gay male, I am concerned that some male patients will react adversely when they suspect or realize that I am gay. I understand many patients will not care and will understand that I am there to help them and it is not some sick joke. This is particularly personal for the patient given the specialty (Urology).
I would like to know how other male nurses have handled situations where a straight male patient has refused or made it very uncomfortable for you to do your job. I do not expect the approval of every patient… just looking for pointers on how to manage this type of situation in a professional manner.
Everyone, please tell me what you think or would do. Thank you!
It is impossible to tell and not under your control. I've had patients assume I was gay and start asking probing questions, "What does your wife do?...How many kids do you have?.." I'm straight with no wife or kids so sometimes the patients have a difficult time sussing me out. That's really on them.
It doesn't bother me at all, I just do my job the best I can and move on. I can't fix patients' hangups about male nurses, so I don't even try.
- Dec 29, '12 by MrChicagoRNQuote from Devon RexI've been a nurse >25 years. I'm sure some have wondered about my sexual preference, and while occasionally a few have asked if I was married, or had kids, no one ever out right asked; nor have I ever experienced any refusals or hostility.Thanks for your responses thus far! I'm not flamboyant, but some people are able to tell without asking. I am respectful, very discreet, and have been very professional my whole life. I have a few straight male friends who used to be homophobes and I've earned their respect.!!
Don't lose any sleep over it
- Jan 12 by NurseGuyBriI'll bet your fears will be unconfirmed. You are a professional and i suspect you will act that way, even if you happen to be effeminate. I have never had any concerns because although you can usually tell that I am gay, when I'm with a patient I ensure the focus stays on the patient. Don't be fake, it will show. Just be natural but professional. Again, I seriously doubt you will have trouble.
- Jan 12 by umbdudeQuote from MrChicagoRNJust curious, if your patient asks if you're married, and you have a long-term partner, do you just tell the patient that you have a partner?I've been a nurse >25 years. I'm sure some have wondered about my sexual preference, and while occasionally a few have asked if I was married, or had kids, no one ever out right asked; nor have I ever experienced any refusals or hostility.
Don't lose any sleep over it
- Jan 12 by Glycerine82I say just be professional. Gay men don't have a problem with me caring for them ( and I've given showers, cath care, wiped bums etc). So in my opinion why should a straight man care if they're being cared for by a gay man. Besides its none of their beezwax if you're gay. Just be professional and if someone has an issue switch patients. I am willing to bet it won't be that often. Also you'll only have these patients for a short time not likely they'll say much, different if you had them for a week in a hospital setting. Good luck!
"No day but today"
- Jan 12 by MrChicagoRNQuote from umbdudeMany people, gay or straight, consider themselves married, whether they have a piece of paper or not.Just curious, if your patient asks if you're married, and you have a long-term partner, do you just tell the patient that you have a partner?