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Gay male nurse concern about male patient care

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Devon Rex has 5 years experience as a ADN, BSN and specializes in Rehab, Ortho-Spine, Med-Surg, & Psych.

7,916 Profile Views; 545 Posts

Hello everyone!

I will be joining the nursing workforce in a couple of months specializing in urological needs (I am not going into med/surg). As a gay male, I am concerned that some male patients will react adversely when they suspect or realize that I am gay. I understand many patients will not care and will understand that I am there to help them and it is not some sick joke. This is particularly personal for the patient given the specialty (Urology).

I would like to know how other male nurses have handled situations where a straight male patient has refused or made it very uncomfortable for you to do your job. I do not expect the approval of every patient... just looking for pointers on how to manage this type of situation in a professional manner.

Everyone, please tell me what you think or would do. Thank you!

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295 Posts; 4,994 Profile Views

Are you really expecting a patients approval of who you are? If a patient needs surgery, and the top surgeon in the office is gay, is the patient really going to be like ”Sorry, you're gay, you can't remove my spleen.”

I wouldn't believe it even if I heard it.

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Devon Rex has 5 years experience as a ADN, BSN and specializes in Rehab, Ortho-Spine, Med-Surg, & Psych.

545 Posts; 7,916 Profile Views

That is not what I am concerned about.

I'll be working at a doctor's office. As I said before, I'm not expecting approval from patients of who I am privately. I'm looking for advice on how to handle a situation (professionally) I know I will be facing in the future.

Thanks.

Edited by Devon Rex

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112 Posts; 2,832 Profile Views

I understand your concerns completely, just remain professional in all circumstances. I have personally witnessed pts questioning the motives\intentions of some nurses.

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295 Posts; 4,994 Profile Views

That is not what I am concerned about.

I'll be working at a doctor's office. As I said before, I'm not expecting approval from patients of who I am privately. I'm looking for advice on how to handle a situation (professionally) I know I will be facing in the future.

Thanks.

Oops, I totally misread the last part of your original post. Sorry about that.

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tomc5555 has 2 years experience.

250 Posts; 4,574 Profile Views

Be professional and do a great job. Thats all anyone can expect or want from a nurse.

The rest is none of the patients business.

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12 Posts; 832 Profile Views

I say you should just do your job to the besy of your ability. I'm going to sound like an ******* when I say this, but if the patient has that much of an issue that he can't let you do your job, to hell with the patient then! In my opinion, there is no way to professionally handle a gay/straight (nurse/patient) situation. Im sure onebof your future colleagues will be happy to switch patients with you! (:

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zieglarf has 3 years experience as a LVN and specializes in SNF/LTC.

57 Posts; 3,475 Profile Views

Some females don't want men to assist them. Some men don't want women to assist them. Some people don't want nurse of another race to help. Some men don't want gay men to assist them - oh well. It's part of the job and part of the culture. If possible, then switch with another nurse.

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276 Posts; 9,716 Profile Views

I'm straight, but if you have that gay voice and are all flamboyant about your gayness it would make me uncomfortable. I really have no issues with women, but I don't act weird either.

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295 Posts; 4,994 Profile Views

I'm straight, but if you have that gay voice and are all flamboyant about your gayness it would make me uncomfortable. I really have no issues with women, but I don't act weird either.

Naturally some gay men are just slightly more feminine than straight men. Just saying...

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Devon Rex has 5 years experience as a ADN, BSN and specializes in Rehab, Ortho-Spine, Med-Surg, & Psych.

545 Posts; 7,916 Profile Views

Thanks for your responses thus far! I'm not flamboyant, but some people are able to tell without asking. I am respectful, very discreet, and have been very professional my whole life. I have a few straight male friends who used to be homophobes and I've earned their respect.

I feel more confident now after reading your comments. Thanks !!

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202 Posts; 5,311 Profile Views

Honestly who cares? If you are a professional and are a caring person-why do I care what your sexuality is? Plus if a patient asks you...you tell them you do not discuss your personal life.

As long as you act professional and do a good job..that's all people usually want.

Someone's sexuality is PART of a person not the focus of a person.

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