A Dear Abbey letter. What is your take? - page 8

I would like to hear your opinions regarding this situation from a letter taken from Dear Abbey. Do you agree with Abbey? Or should the nurse have done something differently? DEAR ABBY: While... Read More

  1. by   smk1
    Quote from stevielynn
    I don't think any of us are saying it is ok to violate a person's privacy.

    But it is a little funny that the wife was concerned about her husband's nakedness only because there was another woman seeing it.

    Obviously you ask permission and state your purpose and guard the patient's privacy.

    steph
    Maybe the nurse was "hot" and she was uncomfortable thinking about her working so "intimately" with her husband . The more i think about it, i bet that is what the issue really is.
  2. by   fergus51
    Quote from caroladybelle
    ...

    I am also amazed at those that will grab the phone/pen/email to complain to Dear Abby/lawyer/DA/patient representative when a very simple, "Excuse me, but I prefer that I be out of the room when you examine my spouses's whatever...I know that may not be usual, but please warn me next time", would work quite nicely.

    But that, I suppose, would be too lacking in offense, too polite, too simple, too responsible, and contain much too much common sense for today's society.

    Would that we work to correct mistakes and inform others of our preferences, rather than suing them/whining about such things that are easily corrected.
    I nominate this for the best post ever award!
  3. by   nurse4theplanet
    Quote from fergus51
    I nominate this for the best post ever award!
    Second that nomination fergus:hatparty:
  4. by   smk1
    Quote from grannynurse FNP student
    You apparently are unaware of the number of husbands and wives who do not expose themselves to one another. And you apparently are unaware of religious restrictions regarding nudity. And you certainly give a great deal of latitude to the nurse's 'mistake' of yanking back the covers and exposing the patient's genitals to his wife. And by you, I mean all of the collective you who think the wife is off the deep end. Perhaps all of you and DA could benefit from some retraining in cultural and religious values and restrictions.

    Grannynurse
    if it were a religous or cultural issue, wouldn't thi sbe in the chart? Obviously this isn't the first time this man had to be "exposed" in the hospital. Perhaps it hasn't ever happened to his wife before, but i would think that if it were a cultural or religious issue this would have been brougt up because of the nature of the problem... I do agree that the nurse should have said something, and maybe she did early on (such as upon walking into the room)but it was forgotten during the "chat" that they all were having. In any case the wife seems more jealous than anything, maybe she has some issues to work through. Privacy is essential, but it isn't like the nurse walked up and wipped off the sheet in a public room.
  5. by   smk1
    Quote from Marie_LPN
    It would be so nice if people would not chalk up someone's opinion on a subject to them being young, and predicting their attitude would change as they grow older!

    Sorry, that's just rude.
    thankyou! i have not seen anyone here who is not all for respecting a persons privacy.
  6. by   Tweety
    Quote from caroladybelle
    I always am amazed at posters that denigrate someone else's opinion by insinuating that they are too young/old/married/single/with children/childless/female/male to possibly understand and be appropriately sensitive to a particular issue.

    I am also amazed at those that will grab the phone/pen/email to complain to Dear Abby/lawyer/DA/patient representative when a very simple, "Excuse me, but I prefer that I be out of the room when you examine my spouses's whatever...I know that may not be usual, but please warn me next time", would work quite nicely.

    But that, I suppose, would be too lacking in offense, too polite, too simple, too responsible, and contain much too much common sense for today's society.

    Would that we work to correct mistakes and inform others of our preferences, rather than suing them/whining about such things that are easily corrected.

    Excellent post, as always.
  7. by   Tweety
    To me, it's about respect. Nurse should respect the patient enough not to expose the patient, either in front of his wife or in private one-on-one assessment.

    2nd have to respect the wife. I'm sure she wasn't upset at the site of her husband's body, but the fact he was naked unnecessarily in front of a strange women. Whatever her lifestyle and beliefs are I have to respect that.

    Could have been avoided by looking at the abdomen without exposing the genitals. I see my peers just peel off blankets and sheets all the time. Whatever happened to respecting modesty. I would die if someone did that me, even if I know my body means no more to them than a CPR manniquen.

    But I do think that Abby is correct, the lady needs to lighten up slightly as it wasn't a sexual act, but a professional one.
  8. by   SmilingBluEyes
    I think Steph said it well.....the thread is becoming redundant.....respecting patient privacy is not anything we are arguing here. I also think Carole said it well-----we need to communcate more and sue others less.......
  9. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    I'm figuring if the woman was this upset over what the nurse did, she most certainly wouldn't go to the nurse and talk to her.

    Maybe this person thought the nurse would read the column?
  10. by   GingerSue
    [quote]. Don't you dare wip into my room and yank the covers off me, exposing me. You will find yourself explaining it to your administrator because I will file a complaint. And I will follow up on my compllaint, with the appropriate administrator.[quote]

    be careful about those intrusive behaviours without asking/warning the patient! I wouldn't like anyone doing this to me. The nurse's behaviour in doing this was disrespectful to the patient. (what if the female visitor in the patient's room wasn't his wife?)
  11. by   grannynurse FNP student
    [QUOTE=GingerSue][quote]. Don't you dare wip into my room and yank the covers off me, exposing me. You will find yourself explaining it to your administrator because I will file a complaint. And I will follow up on my compllaint, with the appropriate administrator.

    be careful about those intrusive behaviours without asking/warning the patient! I wouldn't like anyone doing this to me. The nurse's behaviour in doing this was disrespectful to the patient. (what if the female visitor in the patient's room wasn't his wife?)
    You have a point. The female could be a sister, friend, co-worker, boss, church visitor, whom ever. My father and SIL would be mortified if they were ever exposed to me, even knowing I'm a nurse.

    Grannynurse
  12. by   mercyteapot
    Actually, there have been several posts throughout the thread that implied the nurse needn't concern herself with the patient's privacy when the wife was in the room. Why else call the wife ridiculous, uptight, or any of the other names that have been thrown about? And allow me to take this opportunity to thank the nurse at Palomar Hospital who was respectful of my husband's dignity and my feelings when he was hospitalized last year. I'd hate to think that my nurse went to a bulletin board and made fun of me or my family just because they considered my feelings odd. Redundant or not, I don't think Abby's response was very nice, but what really bothers me is that it's been echoed so frequently throughout this thread.
  13. by   SharonH, RN
    Quote from SMK1
    I mentioned the chart having cultural and religious info in it because my one and only experience with an overnight stay in the hospital included the nurse writing down my religious afiliation and any special accomodations that i would need. Perhaps this is not the norm :uhoh21:

    Asking the patient about their cultural and religious background as it may pertain to their care is very much the norm. I can't remember if it is a JCAHO standard or not, but it is most often on the admission form (which tells me that it probably is). So you are not wrong.

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