So many of you are amazing people and nurses. The time you put in responding to posts on Allnurses really does make a difference.
BUT.
When people come here asking for advice on a situation, they are not looking for your opinion of them as a person or their behavior. You all know what threads I'm talking about.
It's one thing to point out that their behavior could potentially be dangerous to patients.
It's one thing to be honest and tell them that their future doesn't look too bright.
It's one thing to suggest they may find seeing a therapist very helpful.
It's another to tell them they are mentally ill, mock them RELENTLESSLY, or judge them. When you do this to your fellow nurses (that have just come to you for advice), you're worse than that poor, scared soul you FLAMED for thinking a drug abuser may have a bloodborne illness.
These posters are often simply desperate, scared, or just plain curious!
I know it's important to have a thick skin when you work in healthcare, and I sure as heck am not busting out the trigger-words bully†or NETY.†It's just that even in my CNA class, it was emphasized over and over that it's not our place to judge patients. Can't you afford the same courtesy to other nurses?
I'm generally a pretty quiet person, but I believe in standing up for other people. So I just had to put this out there.
Not only do I know those words, I USE them! With one exception: I have never heard of "cattywampus". I will now have to toddle off and learn what the heck that is....
ETA: I followed the link, but no cattywampus to be found! I Googled it and learned that I have, at times, had frames on my wall that were indeed cattywampus
Good word.
I never heard that word either until a patient said it. She said "Honey, will you straighten me out? I'm all cattywampus on the bed." I was like, "WHAT"?!?!?
Shenanigans! another favorite! For some reason I also really like the word avocado... I know... it's weird. And if you say "rich"... like referring to how a food tastes... to my brother, it makes him shutter. He hates it.
Thanks for the link. I'm going to drive my family nuts with all those words :)
The problem I see with berating or complaining about a post because it is "rude"is that the word "rude" is very subjective. Why do YOU get to define it instead of someone else? Why is YOUR definition the correct one rather than someone else's definition?
This is the heart of the matter right there. Well said.
Specializes in Med nurse in med-surg., float, HH, and PDN.
I had a cat named Curmudgeon; he was a big old dark grey Tom with white paws. Followed us kids home from a morning of sledding on the hill by the dairy farm. Guess he was tired of mice and cow-pies. Followed us 9/10ths of a mile to our house and never looked back.
I know there are fifteen pages of other posts (which I've skimmed through), but I wanted to post and let you know OP, I completely agree with you. I don't think I've seen the specific posts that you're referencing, but I don't have to in order to see what you mean.
I was very surprised to see trauma write that snarky/rude comments are not allowed here, because I see them all the time. It's the reason I've only been a member for a few months -- I've been a lurker for years. I love joining online forums and engaging in discussion with others. Having an open mind and soaking up others' view points is the best way to learn, even if you don't come to agree with those view points. Yet, I've never wanted to do this here because the overall air is of judgment. I knew that in real life, society has a lot of constraints they put on nurses, expectations for them, etc. I didn't know nurses themselves were so judgmental of their fellow nurses, but AN showed me that this is the case, and working in a hospital cemented it. I keep my mouth shut and my skin thick at work, and I've found that that's been the best way for me to learn from AN as well.
I'm not saying AN is some cutthroat wasteland of jackals or NETY or anything of the sort -- I just know exactly where OP is coming from when she says she often feels that posters here come across as rude for the sake of... being right? Superiority? I don't even know. I just know I don't care for it. That's my $.02.
I just know exactly where OP is coming from when she says she often feels that posters here come across as rude for the sake of... being right? Superiority? I don't even know. I just know I don't care for it. That's my $.02.
Some posters may do that. Image the amount of poster though who bite their tongues and don't say anything. It could be much worse than some think it really is.
Specializes in Mental Health, Gerontology, Palliative.
It is interesting the comments I see on here. Generally, we have the comments that are pro-kindness and those that are anti-kindness. .
Some massive assumptions there and totally incorrect at least in my case
I'm neither pro or anti kindness or rudeness.
I'm anti people who want to make the rest of us all like them, who cry 'you are intolerant' and in the same breath proceed to put down and speak with intolerance about those who they are accusing of being intolerant
Specializes in Mental Health, Gerontology, Palliative.
The problem I see with berating or complaining about a post because it is "rude"is that the word "rude" is very subjective. Why do YOU get to define it instead of someone else? Why is YOUR definition the correct one rather than someone else's definition?
The mods have the ultimate say. Use your triangle when you believe it's appropriate. If the post stays, then it behooves YOU to evaluate your trigger finger.
Requoting for the general awesomeness in this post
who cry 'you are intolerant' and in the same breath proceed to put down and speak with intolerance about those who they are accusing of being intolerant
It's funny how the people who do this never see it....
Some posters may do that. Image the amount of poster though who bite their tongues and don't say anything. It could be much worse than some think it really is.
"It could be worse" is generally a pretty terrible argument for validating the way things are.
One of my favorite words!
Horseshoe, BSN, RN
5,879 Posts
I never heard that word either until a patient said it. She said "Honey, will you straighten me out? I'm all cattywampus on the bed." I was like, "WHAT"?!?!?