I am not religious but every so often I come across a patient whom I know needs more help than mortal hands can give but you just do not know which way to pray.
You know the patient - they are usually young and would have had everything going for them. What has struck them down has been a catastophe - whether it is a severe head injury or maybe Meningococcus or something that takes a fit young person and leaves a train wreck that will never have a full or even partially normal life again. They have young families and you find yourself thinking "Please survive for them" and then you think through the daily cost of survival from this point on and you don't know whether you are doing them a favour.
In other words the patient for whom you do not know whether you should be hoping for survival for praying for release.
We have one now and it is sooo sad. What he originally presented with was so minor no-one would have thought twice of the problem - this sent on to full blown sepsis - and now- I am sorry but cannot give more details out of respect for the family just let me say he is now one of those whom I do not know how I should be praying/appealing to the powers that be...
Sometimes this is the price we pay for saving the ones we do. We have those who can never truly be thankful that we did intervene. Whose lives will not just "never be the same" but will continue only at a daily cost and struggle.
We do our best and we worry whether it IS for the best.
Reading your post gives me chills. There is a pt situation like that on my floor. When I could think of nothing else to ask God, I asked that he hold her and her family in his arms.
I believe we should pray for God's will, not our wants necessarily. Although I have often made special requests, I still feel that God knows more than I and will do the right thing, even if I don't agree with Him. I really believe in the power of prayer. Even if you are not expecting a positive result in a hopeless situation, how can it hurt anyone to know that someone cares enough to try? Remember that God is in the miracle business.
In the acute phase of illness you hope and try for recovery. If things go well, everyone is happy. If things end quickly no one is happy, but there is a focus to the pain. "Joe" is going we miss him. We are mourning. But the worst scenario is the pt that doesn't recover but doesn't die. I've seen this in ltc. The pt lays there for years the family suffers for years. "I think he looked straight at me today.... I don't knoe if he's hurting...... I know he wouldn't have wanted to live like this..... "
I usually prayer that to God that he heals them, and if not then please give the patient and the family his strength and peace. I also add a prayer that the family be able to get some restful sleep because I know that many of them stay up for days and nights and cannot sleep. I learned long ago that God does as he pleases and I just have to accept what I can't understand (though I do voice my disapproval sometimes- God is used to me complaining, I am his whiny child).
Life is so unfair and cruel. I think God looks at the big scheme of things and sees our lives here as just a second in time. His time is eternal and what is 10,20,50 or more years in a time frame of eternity. Just a passing moment to the creator. To us this time of need and grief is so long. But HE knows that our lives here are just a passing moment with eternity promised to us. So I guess if I always had alot of faith some situations would not seem so painful. But I am human and grieve. Someday it will all become clear. But for me it will not be in this life. So keep praying Gwenith. God will sort it out in the end. I am saying a prayer for God to comfort you.
I agree with the "Thy will be done", and tag on a request for the strength to deal with the pain going on all around.
One night I was praying and demanding to know why God didn't let this poor man die, when it was inevitable and we were trying for comfort measures only. He answered me, sometimes a patient hangs on that much longer despite the pain, in order to spend a little more time with his family. Sometimes the time is worth the pain.
I also remember the woman paralyzed from the neck down who had pneumonia, and was treated & recovered. Some said why bother, what quality of life was there for her and wouldn't it be kinder to let her go? But her small children were ecstatic the day they got to come get Mom and take her home.
God knows ALL of the details, which is why its safe to leave it in His hands. Still offer lots of "suggestions" to Him though:roll
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
sometimes I simply pray for Grace.
Sometimes that is all I can think of to ask and yet it says a lot to me.
I prayed hard for grace after my miscarriage two weeks ago. I can't ask G-d to give me what is not mine to have.....And I don't know what HE means for me to have all the time. But I can ask for grace in handling what I DO HAVE. And for Grace in tackling the obstacles and setbacks we all suffer.
Sometimes I get peace from just praying for Grace.:)
Hope my rambling makes sense to someone out there.
You know how to pray; you do it in your compassionate thoughts for the person. Your request does not have to be vocal nor given on your knees with your palms together. I think we all pray; whether we are religious or not.
Sometimes when we don't know what to pray for, tell Him that, he knows our needs and wants. Pray for His will, he's got the big picture in mind. I pray for the families, that they would feel peace and comfort, be able to sleep soundly and would have clariety in their decisions. I pray for wisdom and discernment. I also pray for myself-that God would give me good assessment skills and even better intervention skills.
We recently had a 12 year old, severe brain injury that survived. A prime example, what do you pray for? I know that God's got plans for this kid to make some kind of difference in someone's life, at some point, because this kid beat the odds and survived. Now, quality of life is a different issue......but I'm pretty sure God's got that covered too. We just have to stay tuned and watch what happens.
When in the situation described by Gwenith, I pray that no matter what the outcome will be, I ask that God be with the family and pt, and give them strength, comfort and peace.
Hello all...I have been surfing the discussions for a few weeks now but this is my first post.
As a newbie here I would like to offer my $0.02 worth on this topic...if you are not of the Christian faith then my effort is not to offend you...whatever force you believe drives the universe can be plugged in to this formula.
Each night on my way to work I pray for strong hands, a clear mind, and a pure heart. I pray that God unfold his cloak of protection and blessing upon me, my coworkers, patients and their families. I pray for tolerance and that I place patient advocacy foremost (yes, and that is sometimes at cross-purposes with management and "the system") I pray that I may be a conduit or a vessel for whatever God's purpose is. More often than not I do not understand that purpose and it is not mine to know.
Do I think I am some sort of saint? Far from it. Am I a great nurse? Probably not, I do the very best I can with what I have to work with.
If I ever reach the point where I am untouched by the tragedies unfolding around us then that would will be a signal that I need to leave this profession.
For now, i can only offer love, compassion, patient advocacy and the the very best care that I can provide. When the tears or gloom come I must be thankful for them because it shows that I have not become hardened.
jackieliz
36 Posts
Gwenith
Reading your post gives me chills. There is a pt situation like that on my floor. When I could think of nothing else to ask God, I asked that he hold her and her family in his arms.