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What I'm learning about LTC facilities scare me. I know there must be some good ones out there somewhere????
But really, between staffing issues, cheap owners who shortchange on supplies, MD's who don't want to be bothered.
Is there anyone here who would put there family member in a nursing home? I think of the day when my mother will need care. She is ambulatory now but in the next several years may not be.
I have other options but what about people who don't?
Would you do it? I think I would be very nervous to do so. I know there are wonderful nurses and CNA's in LTC. But not enough to do the job safely. What's the solution?
Only if I absolutely had no other choice!!! To make a very long,very touchy story short my grandmother fell and broke her hip and needed therapy,my family is not well off by any means so we had no choice but to take her to a facility til she was well enough to bring her home.I never missed a day of visiting her out of the whole 2 month ordeal and she was still treated terribly without my family even knowing until about 2 weeks before she passed and we moved her to another facility.She was in a comatose stage,forced fed,terrible bed sores from head to toe,pneumonia off and on along with many other complications that arised during the time she was there.Ultimately they attempted to force her into doing therapy and because she was pure dead weight she ended up with a huge gash in her leg that was never reported,covered up with stockings and a bootie and never treated for as if it never happened!!!!The wound got terribly infected and she died from sepsis exactly 2 months from the day she was put in that awful place.Not every place is this terrible but it's definately not the ideal place for loved ones the majority of times.My heart goes out to these residents and their families that have had to or may have to someday consider this very option.
My parents are fairly young (ages 49 and 50), but they're making unwise lifestyle choices that might land them into a nursing home within the next few years.
My father smokes 1 to 1.5 packs of cigarettes daily and abuses ETOH, even though he is a type I diabetic, hepatitis C positive, hypertensive, and has hyperlipidemia. He does not comply with his medication regimin because the Lipitor was supposedly giving him a 'strange' odor. His mother had a massive stroke at age 48, and I suspect that history will repeat itself if father continues on this unhealthy path.
My mother is a type II diabetic, overweight, smokes half a pack of cigarettes daily, has tachycardia and palpitations, and underwent a liver transplantation 5 years ago. She takes immunosuppressant drugs to keep the allograft liver from rejecting and, as a result, becomes sick easily. In her future I see congestive heart failure from the years of tachycardia, massive infections from her suppressed immune system, and other issues.
The decision to place mother and father in an extended care facility would be difficult for me to make. However, my parents are making lifestyle choices that frequently result in intervention from healthcare facilities. They could enter old age with few health problems, still live at home, and maintain a degree of independence if only they made some lifestyle modifications. However, I predict that they might need nursing home care in the future.
This is not me being partial but by far the nicest and best staffed LTC's I have been in are Jewish. The staff ratio's are incredible, at least in the cities I have worked, one had a CNA to Pt ratio of 1 to 1. Every room with two patients had two fold down desks, one on the left and one the right where the CNA's would sit until they were needed.
I am sure this level of care is not cheap though. Also if you have ever been to some LTC/ECF/NH/?? you know the smell is not exactly fresh, the above mentioned LTC always smelled like fresh bread or cookies.
Peace,
Tripps
I know there are horror stories of LTC. I work LTC per choice and honestly I go in to work happy and leave happy. LTC in some areas are improving greatly since awareness is there and the Patients needs are always first where I am employed. Families are involved with the plan of care and we really are blessed with the facility we have. I know it was not always that way. I speak with families when they tour our facility and I see them cry with the decison of having to bring their loved one there. In reality they need to feel safe and feel that their loved one will be taken care of and that they will be involved in decisons regarding their care. I know there are not the best facilities out there and hopefully during state inspections and proper reporting these places will one day be weeded out. It is extrememly difficult working and caring for aloved one. My father in law lives with us, he has stage 4 multiple myeloma. for 7 months I have been working, taking care of my 3 children. Chemo twice a week and somehow managing to keep it together. In the process I am losing the time for myself. LTC is not a choice for him right now as he has expressed the want to be with us and the children and I respect that. However it is every difficult being 27 and doing everything I am doing. It isn't a selfish choice to put your loved one in LTC. You just need to be aware of the facilty. Tour it many times and ask questions. Challenge them if you aren't comfortable. Report anything that you see unfit. Without others speaking up, the facilities that are allowed to remain open will continue to lead to poor respect for LTC.
Living in Florida there are a few nursing homes I wouldn't hesitate to put my loved ones in. However, I've noticed that good nursing homes don't always stay good and bad ones don't always stay bad. So if you have to go that route, it's important to keep a visible presence and stay involved with your loved one for the best possible care.
I am lucky in that my home town includes an excellent retirement community that includes independent houses, independent apartments, assisted living, short-term care, and long-term care. Once you are a member of that community, you automatically move to the top of any waiting list to the higher levels of care when needed. My parents chose to place my grandparents there -- and made their own arrangements for moving there themeselves once they retired.
My parents moved into a separate, independent house there when they were 65 and both healthy. To do that, there was a waiting list of approximately 6 months. As their health deteriorated, the services of the community (including nursing care, visiting nurses, and hospice care) were available to them automatically without having to be on any more waiting lists. My father died in a hospital and never used the long-term care portion. My mother used some of the home care services available through the community for a couple of weeks and then went into the long-term care portion for a week before her death. It was a beautiful room with a big bay window overlooking the grounds and the duck pond. She received excellent care.
Morals of the story: 1. Everyone should plan ahead for their own future while they are still able to do so. Don't wait until you really need immediate admission to begin investigating the options and getting on the waiting lists. There are good places out there ... but you may need to make arrangements in advance if you want them to be there when you need them. Making your own arrangement also helps your family by not forcing them to make these difficult decisions under stress for you.
2. Save your money (and perhaps buy long-term care insurance) to cover the costs. Don't burden your family with having to pay for your care whether it be at home or in a facility. Give yourself and your family the financial ability to choose what is best for you and for them.
Absolutely not!!!!My dear mom became totally dependant incontinent,unable to fee,dress bathe,or even talk.My sister and I took turns caring for her,She spent a short time in a NH for rehab for a broken hip.I came to visit her and her back was to the table,where her breakfast was.The NA saw me and quickly turned her towards her meal and stated she was just gonna feed her.Yeah right!!Anyways,We ended up taking her back home and took turns caring for her.I have no regrets about it.
Nope, not me. I visited pts in nursing homes yesterday via my Hospice rotation. I would sell everything I own and take out a loan if I had to to keep my mother at home. She's 86, has COPD but does well, and loves living independently. (She was widowed about 20 years ago.) I think my kids--her grandkids--would be horrified if I placed her in any of the NHs near us. I agree it depends on circumstances and finances and do not judge anyone for the decisions they have to make. It can be very, very difficult.
i know that there are people who can't take care of their parents, both workingm kids in college, etc
if you have to put your loved one in a nursing home don't try and be the nice guy, speak up often if you see bad things happen
document any problems you see with time and date in case you have to go to an ombudsman
lot of good advise here, plan ahead, get ltc insurance before mi or cva or certain age..make sure your insurance is not a fly-by-night but something you can depend on
It would depend if my parents WANTED me to take care of them and if I had the means to take care of them.
So far my parents seem like the type that wouldn't want me taking care of their personal cares. I also feel that the socialization they would get with their peers in a nursing home would be a good thing. What can they do in my home other that sit in front of the TV all day?
I think that there will be a lot of changes in long term care as the baby boomers keep getting older.
LadyLurker
49 Posts
Are LTC facilities in the USA *that* terrible???
I'm not saying that all LTCs in Ontario are fabulous-great, but I wouldn't hesitate to admit my mom or dad to a NH here. In fact, my parents have forbidden all 4 of us "kids" to take them in, no matter what the circumstances.
My mom looked after her dad, in TN, for 8 years, after he had a stroke; the last 1 1/2 years he was in a NH. Looking after him put her under incredible stress... it's very very difficult to be both daughter AND caregiver. I'm not saying that it cannot be done, but I saw what it did to her, with no sibling support, and me living in Ontario.
I also watched my SIL look after my MIL for 7 years... my help was neither wanted nor asked for. I watched their relationship warp into a twisted reversal of mother-daughter, and my SIL's marriage almost collapse.
Kudos to you if LTC placement is not in your plans.... make sure you have a good support system, and outside help to allow you to leave the home on a regular basis.
Karen
Ladylurker