Workplace Sayings

[Davey Do]

We have a saying where I work that goes "There's a right way, and then there's the _______ ________ Medical Center's way!".

When a coworker complains of the way something is done, then makes and appropriate suggestion, I reply with, "Stop making sense!"

Rooty Payne, my work brother in arms, has a couple:

"It's only (8 or 12) hours."

"I don't run the train, I only shovel the coal."

Got any?

[gemmi999]

One of our ER docs is fond of saying, re: complaining/loud/moaning/screaming pts: "Nothing that propofol won't cure"

[DenraSam]

And there is only one thing we say to death: "Not today."

Syrio Forel to Arya Stark in Game of Thrones:)

[TriciaJ, RN]

"

"Incarceritis" (CP secondary to arrest by local PD)

I love this one. I dealt with it all the time at the jail. Not just chest pain, but flopping like a mackeral and announcing "I'm having a seizure!" and the women all had bloodless "hemorrhaging".

[Buckeye.nurse]

The marker of a good shift when in charge? "Nobody died, and nobody cried."

Often said at my previous job at a children's hospital: "God looks after idiots and children...especially on July 1st".

[Wuzzie]

Air goes in and out. Blood goes round and round. Any deviation and you've got trouble.

[RNperdiem, RN]

"Eyeball test" This is a word our doctors use when how a patient appears regardless of what the labs and tests say. "I considered sending Mr Jones to the step down unit, but he didn't pass the eyeball test, so he will stay in ICU another day."

[Oldmahubbard]

The Q sign.

[BedsideNurse]

Overhead at the bedside of an impending emergency: "Oh no. Here comes Dr. Don't Just Do Something Stand There."

[winterblue]

When introducing patients to the lovely disposable mesh panties during pericare on postpartum:

"These are Victoria's Other Secret."

[KatieMI, BSN, MSN, RN]

Universal dose calculation: just enough of it.

You can always add a drug, but once you did that, you cannot get it out.

Start low, go slow, get to goal

It's a sin to make Jesus' bus waiting

[brandy1017, ASN, RN]

I love the Wrongway Regional Medical Center I can so relate! And keeping them alive till 7:05 because death is too much paperwork!

[Roy Hanson]

when everything else fail..follow the instructions! Ask the boss why the hospital dictates that this is the way WE want it done..Possible lawsuits?