Why am I so depressed?

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Hi everyone. I come to get advice and to see some clarity in my situation from someone who has been there with my current situation now.

I am 23 years old, passed NCLEX in April and got a job at a subacute rehab/ltc facility. Previously while I was in school I was working for a hospital for 4 years as a CNA but they couldnt give me a RN position because they are trying to go Magnet. I told the nursing recruitment I am enrolled in a BSN program (even though I wasnt but I was going to apply right after if interview went well) so they would consider hiring me. But in the end I never got an offer.

My one friend got me the connection to work in this rehab and I have been there for a few months. I like it and the staff is super supportive and im learning alot but I feel I could be learning alot more. All my friends I graduated with got a job in a hospital somehow by a stroke of luck I guess but im still here waiting to get a call back. Im sort of depressed and not liking where I am in my job life right now. I want to be in a hospital setting and learn alot since im a new grad but im stuck at this rehab til something better comes along. Im not really sure how to see the light at the end of this tunnel and I just dont have any motivation anymore with nursing because I am not where I pictured myself. Please give me some guidance or words to get thru this. I feel stuck in a rut and dont want to dig deeper in this hole.

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Specializes in NICU.

Have you applied for any hospital jobs? From your post it sounds like you tried to leverage a previous job into a nursing position, which didn't work (and never lie to recruiters, by the way), and then got your current place through a friend. Maybe your classmates were sending out dozens of applications and that's why they managed to secure hospital jobs.

Things generally don't just "come along" in life, you have to make them happen. Until that time, appreciate the fact that you have a job where you're learning a lot (not "alot") and your coworkers are supportive, because you're doing better than many new grads.

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I can understand being depressed about not getting a hospital job, but there is definitely light at the end of the tunnel, and whether or not you see that is completely dependent on how you choose to see your situation.

For starters, congratulations on passing NCLEX and securing your first job! That's a hell of a lot better than being unemployed, which is what many new grads face. You're at least learning something. You're at least using nursing skills. You can certainly work this job while searching for your hospital position. You've got a lot going for you right now.

You can choose to have a good outlook and be the best nurse you can be for your patients. Because guess what? You patients don't want to be there either. Be one of their best nurses.

If the hospitals in your area are all going for magnet status, it is very possible that you will not secure a hospital job until you complete your BSN program. So focus on continuing your education.

You'll get to your goal. You just have to work for it, and possibly wait a little while.

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I have applied to every hospital in the state just to receive rejection letters. I also had a professional revamp my resume and cover letter as well

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Relax, you're 23 and just getting started. And who knows, it could be karma chewin' on ya for lying to that recruiter.

You sound like someone who is lost without instant gratification. Count your lucky stars you even have a job as a newbie. Plenty to learn while in rehab. Concentrate on that instead of what your friends are doing. Get soooo confident and competent that you can get another job on your own, and not because someone has a connection.

Read this site and you'll see there are plenty of nurses who desparately want out of the hospital setting.

Good luck.

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Specializes in LTC,Hospice/palliative care,acute care.

Don't underestimate the experience you are gaining now.

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Specializes in ICU.

The writing has been on the wall for a while now about hospitals wanting BSNs. You took a gamble going to an associate's degree program if you really wanted a job in a hospital, and unfortunately it did not play out like you wanted it to. You can still learn a ton in rehab and you actually have a job, so you are doing better than many new grads. Cheer up!

My advice is to go ahead and enroll in a RN-BSN program and get it over with, it's definitely harder to go back to school once you get used to just working. By the time you've finished that, you will have plenty of experience working as a nurse and you should be able to get a hospital job more easily.

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Specializes in ER, Med/Surg, Telemetry, Dialysis.

It's okay to feel a little down, you had a vision for yourself and it hasn't worked out that way yet. But you just can't let yourself stay down, and the best way I've found to get myself out of the "this isn't working out how I planned dumps" is to come up with a new plan, work towards it, and be willing to have a lot of patience getting there. As others have pointed out, go back for your bsn and know that after a year of the experience you are thankfully getting right now, doors will open up for you. I would also stop comparing yourself to others, that's a sure fire way to wind up depressed.

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Things didn't immediately turn out exactly how you planned and now you've lost all motivation for nursing? Even though you're in an environment where you're learning a lot and you like your coworkers?

If you're truly having issues with depression then you might need to see a therapist or go to a doctor and talk about your options with medication.

But if this is just the first time you didn't get what you wanted and are feeling sorry for yourself, it's time to pull your head out of your butt and end the pity party.

You have a long way to go before you retire, and will have many jobs between now and then.

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Specializes in Reproductive & Public Health.

It's totally okay to be less than thrilled with your job. The reality of being a grown up is that you have to work, and when you are new to a field (even when you are not!), you aren't always in a position to land the job you really want. Just keep your head up, learn as much as you can, and be grateful for the paycheck. Get your BSN, and keep applying to the jobs you really want. And give yourself a good 6+ more months before you decide you really don't like this job. All jobs are stressful in the beginning, but once you become comfortable it often becomes much more fulfilling.

And I'm sorry, I just couldn't help myself- Hyperbole and a Half: The Alot is Better Than You at Everything

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Thank you everyone for your words. It makes me see things from a different light and I will start making moves to have another plan for myself

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Specializes in Psych, Corrections, Med-Surg, Ambulatory.

Age 23 is far too young to be negatively evaluating your life. You say you like your current job and the people are fantastic? Score! Please stop comparing your situation with your friends who scored hospital jobs. If you read posts on this forum you will know that many of your friends are going to work daily with knots in their stomachs, getting chewed up and spit out and thinking about getting a nice job selling shoes somewhere.

Please do not sell short the value of what you can learn on your current job. You will get a very well-rounded experience, not to mention those all important time-management skills. The skills you develop now will make you a shoe-in for a hospital job down the road, with a much easier learning curve than your poor friends are getting right now. If you need your BSN, so be it.

Make the most of what could turn out to be a fantastic opportunity and experience. And congratulations!

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