Jump to content

Whats the deal with all the crying?!?!....

Posted

So me and my clinical friends were sitting around and lunch, talking about the program and we started asking ourselves about students who cry all the time. We had heard, from nurses on our floor that, that students before us have been found in the clean utility rooms balling their eyes out but no one in our group has even come close. Anxiety yes... uncertainty yes... but we have never come near crying?

So I would like to hear your stories about times you cried in nursing school. What happened to make you cry? Do you think it's an overreaction? We think it is but what do you guys say?

I remember doing really well in A&P back in my pre-req days and then watching my grade take a nose dive. I went from 98% exams to a 70% and 68% both in a row. I remember going into my car and crying a little but it seems like people in the program cry over the smallest things; like they screw up on their first checkoff or they miss a single point on the exam.

Whats the deal with this?...

Wabi Sabi, BSN, RN

Specializes in Psychiatric Nursing.

It could be from stress and being overwhelmed. We had one female student cry at the beginning of the program. She was very young (19 at that time) and never had to deal with sick individuals prior to nursing school. So, there she was, standing outside the patient's room crying. We were of course shocked when we saw that. The instructor took her off the floor and had a talk with her. In the end, she calmed down and was able to get through the rotation. She hasn't cried since then. I guess when people are put in a situation so overwhelming and unfamiliar to them, some of them don't know how to deal with it so they resort to tears. Or perhaps, they are just overachievers.

~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN

Specializes in Emergency Dept. Trauma. Pediatrics. Has 6 years experience.

I started tearing up in one of my classes today but it had nothing to do with school. It had to do with stuff going on at home that I was thinking about. I usually cry when I am angry or frustrated. They're are a handful of people in my class that cry a lot about school, they said they have always been emotional and they get themselves all stressed out and will start crying if they didn't pass returns or a test of something. I normally can handle stress really well but today I let my home stress get the best of me, thankfully no one saw me. My friend that sits next to me might have noticed me wiping my eyes but if he did he isn't the type that would have said anything to me about it. He would know I wouldn't want him to.

Edited by ~Mi Vida Loca~RN

~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN

Specializes in Emergency Dept. Trauma. Pediatrics. Has 6 years experience.

It could be from stress and being overwhelmed. We had one female student cry at the beginning of the program. She was very young (19 at that time) and never had to deal with sick individuals prior to nursing school. So, there she was, standing outside the patient's room crying. We were of course shocked when we saw that. The instructor took her off the floor and had a talk with her. In the end, she calmed down and was able to get through the rotation. She hasn't cried since then. I guess when people are put in a situation so overwhelming and unfamiliar to them, some of them don't know how to deal with it so they resort to tears. Or perhaps, they are just overachievers.

You just reminded me, I did cry (if you want to call it that, it wasn't like hysterics it was pretty quiet) but I did in the hall outside my patients room when I knew she was about to die. I got really close with her in the nursing home and was looking forward to spending the day with her and as soon as I walked in the room I knew she had hours at the most, complete 180 from the week before. It was my first experience with loosing a patient, I left and went out in the half and cried a little and then pulled myself together and went back and made sure she wasn't alone. Her biggest fear was being alone so I talked to my instructor and asked if us students could switch rotate going in and sitting with her so she wouldn't be alone.

Well, I'm on the brink of being in nursing school (start in January) and I personally know that I will probably cry at some point. It isn't that I am over-emotional (goodness knows ask my mom, she says I never show any emotion) it's my way of releasing stress. You know how some people hit things, some people work out, some people yell/curse... well I either go into fits of uncontrollable laughter (which freaks out most of my family 'cause I can't stop it) or I cry. There's nothing really emotional about it. It's mainly a physical thing for me, just like exercise is for some. It just let's the stress/anger/frustration melt away a bit. This sounds crazy, but sometimes I will induce myself to cry in a hot bath after I've had a tough day because my body actually "releases" and I feel less stressed afterward.

Now I'm not saying that I will walk around a hospital crying all the time, in my opinion it's unprofessional, but I have cried once or twice in my office behind closed doors.

Different strokes, different folks. :)

HeartsOpenWide, RN

Specializes in Ante-Intra-Postpartum, Post Gyne.

I only recall crying twice during nursing school, and only once directly related to school. It was second semester and I thought I was going to fail my Med/Surg mid-term; I ended up with a B in the class and went on to graduate Cum Laude. The second time was my last semester when I did not get the job I really wanted and had already gotten several rejections prior to this. I did end up getting the job when a second position opened, but initially I totally fell apart in the shower because I had done a whole bunch of extra work (NRP, beginning midwifery course, became a certified doula, was working on a grant for low income pregnant women, got accepted into Sigma Theta Tau) and did 300 extra clinical hours/precepting in L&D to help me get a job in L&D and it was why I went to nursing school.

Edited by HeartsOpenWide

gibson0726

Specializes in Neonatal ICU. Has 5 years experience.

I cried during my 2nd semester during clinicals. I saw a patient code and die, and then I saw the family get the news. I still see their faces in my mind..It was heartbreaking. I went to the bathroom a couple of times and cried my eyes out.

The second time I cried was today, but they were tears of joy. It was my last clinical day ever! I still remember my very first day stepping onto the unit in my new,crisp scrubs like it was yesterday. It has been a long, hard road and I've learned so much. Today feels better than I had imagined.. :D

in high school i remember specifically crying when i got my first F. I thought I'd go the rest of my life without one of those. i cried for a lonnng time. and i also cried when i realized i didn't pass one of my ap exams. i have not cried since being in college (well, over finances yes but not grades) but i am sure i will in NS. i mean that's my future i don't want to screw anything up. and when you're body is running on empty (no sleep, hardly any food) and your nerves are on end then, yeah, you'd probably cry thinking about how your life is in some one else's hands and your best is not good enough and you are going to disappoint your family. yikes i feel their pain. but i tend to hold negative emotions in until i burst so maybe that's my problem

sunnycalifRN

Has 6 years experience.

Well, I never cried during nursing school but I was in my 50's, male, and older than most of the instructors. But, I did see a number of students who cried during clinical. Most of the time it was due to one particularly nasty instructor who would find fault with everything and then berate the student until she broke down. It wasn't about test scores or grades. The other time students cried was quite understandable because one of our patients died while we were on the unit.

Virgo_RN, BSN, RN

Specializes in Cardiac Telemetry, ED.

I cried when I made a med error.

When I was in my BSN program which I would not recommend to anyone, My tears came from anger. Anger do to the cheating that was going on under the instructors noses. I still think they knew who and when and they, still passed them. My satisfaction was being able to say I pass my board the first time. They took their several times.

Yes Girls and Boys there is a word called WEEDING and schools do it very frequently:angryfire

I'm not in NS yet (next year) but it can be very cathartic for some people to cry. They can release their emotion and then be able to go on and function. I recently had to defer my enrollment to NS for a year b/c of family issues and although I am not a cryer in general, I did cry quite a bit about that. It's probably a very good thing that I did too b/c holding all those feelings in could have been very unhealthy for me.

I have cried several times at home during this, my first semester of an ADN program. My grades have been okay so it's not about that. I failed blood pressure checkoff at the beginning of the semester and that was my first cry. Had to redo it a couple of weeks later and was fine then. Have cried other times since then in anticipation of various checkoffs. I just get very freaked out about checkoffs. Have also cried at home because of being nervous about going to clinicals. I still haven't gotten used to those and have to take stomach medicine and force myself to go! I did cry one time actually at clinicals (I was being oversensitive) but I held it together until I got to a bathroom and I did not sob or make any noise. I don't think anyone realized I had been crying. I would hate to cry IN FRONT of anyone actually at clinicals or at school because IMO that would not make the best impression! I hope I can hold myself together to avoid that. I bet I will cry again many times in the next 3 semesters but I hope I can keep it to home.

I think the OP is being a little insensitive. Of course NS are going to cry--you're dealing with sickness, life, and death, who WOULDN'T be emotional about it? We're nurses, not robots; we shouldn't deny our own humanity any more than we should deny the humanity of our patients. Of course, I don't think one should cry in front of one's patients, since this can make them insecure and uncomfortable, but as long as you're excusing yourself to the bathroom to do it, I see nothing wrong with it. It's not a matter of "unprofessionalism," it's just being human.

ashleyisawesome, BSN, RN

Specializes in LDRP.

i left clinical early today because i was crying. =[ im just so angry and frustrated with my clinical instructor and her favoritism and treating me like im an idiot and embarrassing me in front of everyone in my group. i just keep telling myself i only have 2 or 3 more weeks with her, then i get a new instructor next semester.:imbar

I cried three times. The first was the second week of my first hospital rotation when my patient who had just decided to become DNR had a stroke. I told the nurse my findings (one pupil 7-8 cm the other 2, neither responding to light, absent speech, responsive only to pain) and said to just let her know when he stopped breathing. I lost it and had to go the the breakroom to pull it together and go back in there and bath him. Time two was when I held an 18 month old down for 10 And the last time was at the local children's hospital when I heard the story of a 14 year old whose organs were turning to stone. He wanted to stop the surgeries and go DNR nut his parents refused to give up. He was unable to make his own decisions until he turned 16. Of course my eyes were moist with each birth I witnessed, but I did not cry.

Now that I am an RN I have cried twice. When my first patient died and when I made a med error.

I think nursing school, and any training/ job that requires a lot of discipline and in which you carry the knowledge that a right or wrong move could spell the difference between life and death, it breaks you down and you have to build yourself back up, stronger, to get through it. That's not a pleasant process. Your concept of you changes, or at least it did for me, as far as how much misery (being constantly ill from stress, sleep deprived, aching body, knowledge that not knowing what I should, or zoning out could result in the patient's death or injury- and don't forget the legal issues on top of the moral ones for this. Then there's one's own life-disease exposure: one mucous membrane of yours plus the body fluid of a Hep C patient could make you one. There's also the inability to escape stress in normal ways on the job. A nurse at work or nursing student during clinical can't go on autopilot during great stress like your body is built and programmed to do because it results in deadly errors.) I could live through for a goal. Anytime I hear someone say someone is "just a nurse", or "just go to nursing school if you want easy money", I have to count to ten and remind myself that they are just ignorant and need an easy kick in the mouth. They don't freaking KNOW what you tolerate after you get that acceptance letter. So that's my rant- I'd look at the whole "nursing school" mental/emotional/physical strain package, not the singular event for the crying. :oornt:

For the record,I cry spontaneously, at least once a week. Me breaking down at dinner or in a store is hardly cause for anyone's concern anymore LOL

Edited by muscadinewine

i think i cry about once a week or more. i had to buy a t-shirt that says "crying, there is no crying in nursing school." it matched me so well. i do not cry at school or clinicals tho, i wait until i get home. i think it is healthy, tho, because there has to be some way safe to let all that stress :redpinkhe:redpinkhe:redpinkhe:redpinkhethat we go through in a healthy way.