What if nursing doesn't work?

OCNRN63, RN · Aug 3, 2015

You're missing the point. You are 3 months - THREE MONTHS!! - into a career that took you years to achieve. You have no basis AT THIS POINT to even begin to determine what may or may not be "the right fit."
This sentence:
"But something's not clicking quite right and I just hope it does soon otherwise that dream is down the pipes."
makes me want to bang my head against a wall. Immediate gratification happens with ice cream cones or what you want for dinner. This is your career that you have invested years of education. For the love of Pete, at least give it a year!
And during that year, think about the rest of your life. Some things in life (the good things) take time! And effort! And TIME!

I wish I could like this more than once.

Mavrick, BSN, RN · Aug 4, 2015

If your definition of "happy" has to be instant non-stop yippee skippee then you will never achieve that kind of happiness.

Do not get married, do not have children, do not get a dog. These things will not provide that instant non-stop happiness either. You need to seriously reconsider what cartoon version of happiness you are striving for and realize it might not exist.

Stick with whatever latest version of whatever electronic toy it takes to keep you rapt with pleasure and prepare to upgrade on a continuous basis.

I know you are just going through the growing-up pains we all went through, but you did put it out here in the forumsphere so I'm entitled to my response, "You are about as happy as you make up your mind to be." (with a little help from Abraham Lincoln)

Just a little reminder of the power of the mind, this was written March, 2014, by you: I'm just mostly afraid of not being passionate in the future. I'm worried that i won't find my place in nursing and that i won't be good at skills or even enjoy doing it.

Your prediction came true.

Farawyn · Aug 4, 2015

If your definition of "happy" has to be instant non-stop yippee skippee then you will never achieve that kind of happiness.
Do not get married, do not have children, do not get a dog. These things will not provide that instant non-stop happiness either. You need to seriously reconsider what cartoon version of happiness you are striving for and realize it might not exist.
Stick with whatever latest version of whatever electronic toy it takes to keep you rapt with pleasure and prepare to upgrade on a continuous basis.
I know you are just going through the growing-up pains we all went through, but you did put it out here in the forumsphere so I'm entitled to my response, "You are about as happy as you make up your mind to be." (with a little help from Abraham Lincoln)
Written March, 2014, by you: I'm just mostly afraid of not being passionate in the future. I'm worried that i won't find my place in nursing and that i won't be good at skills or even enjoy doing it.
Your prediction came true.

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JStClair · Aug 4, 2015

My mother earned her BSN over 20 years ago. She worked as a labor and delivery nurse for two years and then quit because of terrible working conditions and unrealistic expectations in the hospital. She then earned a masters degree in computer science and worked with computers for a while for an important software company. After moving to the East Coast and having two children, she worked on a vaccine study in a way that combined her knowledge of programming and healthcare. Eventually she saw how the nursing field has changed over the decades and she began to come back to her dream of working in patient care. She earned another masters and is now an NP in pediatric oncology. I am so proud of her and I am always inspired by her. Her original dream was to become a CNM and now that is my dream for myself. I'm not worried about whether or not nursing will work out for me or whether or not I will eventually become a midwife. I am confident that I will keep myself employed in a field that I am passionate about because I have seen my mother persist in her search for the right career for my entire life. She still doubts herself and occasionally wonders if it was worth it, but I am sure that it has been. There are bad jobs and good jobs but none of that matters. What matters is your personal attitude toward the work that you do. I hope her story can inspire you as well.

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Aug 4, 2015

What if I truly cannot be happy with an RN/BSN degree? I'm scared to go back to college for anything completely different.

There are some situations in life that require us to take a leap of faith. No one on these forums can ensure your happiness with the outcome of your career.

I've observed a recurrent theme from a small number of posters. Several posters appear to place too much weight on the importance of a nursing career. Some nurses grow disillusioned after their unrealistic expectations aren't converted into realities. A few people even seem to expect that nursing will alter the courses of their lives in a majestically transcendental way.

Here's the blunt reality...a career is just a nice word that means "a job,"; it's nothing more and nothing less. Jobs produce income that will cover the bills and facilitate a lifestyle of our liking. Jobs serve a function in society by keeping people busy, occupying time, and utilizing space. Jobs aren't meant to instill happiness, transform lives, or redeem us. I cannot recall one person who laid on a deathbed and begged, "I wish I spent more time at work."

The moral of my post is to avoid depending on a career pathway to provide you with a sole source of personal happiness. Good luck!

Wrench Party · Aug 4, 2015

WHOA, Speed Racer. Slow down a bit. Nursing isn't a sprint, it's a marathon. You can do be all of these things listed and more.

I did bedside, now I work in a clinic, I'm playing with going back to the hospital for a different specialty, I eventually plan on getting

an MSN/DNP/whatever and teaching, and maybe go to research for awhile.

I never understood this total anxiety to "Do all the things NOW!" that younger/newer nurses have. They treat nursing and education like it's a bomb about to go off by the time they're 30. Unless you're bumping up on retirement (please don't misinterpret that, COBs!) I don't understand why you can't breathe a little bit, learn, and settle into your new career.

You have arrived. You are where you wanted to be through school and boards. Enjoy it.

f1j1nurse · Aug 4, 2015

I'm beginning to think that this instant gratification is a generational thing!! 3 months is not enough time to make a decision about if you like nursing or not. I started off in corrections and was in it for 3 years...Loved every minute of it! Changed to med/surg and hated every minute of it. Went back into psych and now I'm in Public Health..love all of it. I'm also a certified Forensic nurse and do that on the side per diem. Nursing is such a vast field with all these little avenues, why don't you do some research and try to find a different niche within nursing before completely giving up?

calivianya, BSN, RN · Aug 4, 2015

A lot of people have said it, but three months really isn't enough. I won't say it takes a year to feel comfortable, because it doesn't - that's a myth - but it usually takes me a year before I feel satisfied.

I am hitting the one year mark at my current job and I feel like this is the length of time it takes for your coworkers to really trust you and be comfortable with you. I felt the same way before I left my first job around the year mark. Your coworkers can know you're competent before then, you can be confident before then, but I feel like the personal relationships really don't mature until you hit a year. People may be nice to you, but you're not "one of us" until then, if that makes sense.

Being trusted and "one of us" makes a huge difference in your everyday satisfaction. I believe anyone who says different is lying. I'm not saying making new besties, I'm saying knowing your coworkers have your back because they know you have theirs.

calivianya, BSN, RN · Aug 4, 2015

I never understood this total anxiety to "Do all the things NOW!" that younger/newer nurses have. They treat nursing and education like it's a bomb about to go off by the time they're 30. Unless you're bumping up on retirement (please don't misinterpret that, COBs!) I don't understand why you can't breathe a little bit, learn, and settle into your new career.

I can't speak for everyone else, but I can speak for me. If I got paralyzed from the neck down tomorrow, 60% of my income from my long term disability insurance would not be enough to pay my bills. Knowing I cannot take care of myself if something happened to me at work makes me want to run around screaming and pull my hair out at all times. I want to be happy NOW, make all the money NOW, and have a million dollars in savings, and the thought that I don't have all of those things yet makes me absolutely crazy, and everything I waste money or time on gives me a constant guilt trip about what I could have done with that time or money that would have been more productive. And then I'm upset that I'm not happy.

Besides, every single one of us could be bumping up on retirement. It only takes one really good workplace accident, which could very well happen tomorrow. Not to be overly pessimistic or anything, but I couldn't imagine just being okay with coasting like everything's going to be alright and relaxing at this stage in my life. I'm way too financially vulnerable.

xoemmylouox, ASN, RN · Aug 4, 2015

Nursing in the real world is a lot different than the Nursing life you experience in school - or the idealistic picture many paint of nursing even before school. Real life nursing is messy. It's hard. You question your skills, your intelligence, your future. That's normal and part of the process. You honestly need to give it more time. You will have good days and bad days. I feel if the good days out number the bad you are doing well. If LTC doesn't work try an outpt office. You will make less $$, but it is a different level of stress and work. Don't give up already. There are limitless options with nursing that require no patient care at all - like working with the IT dept.

RNfaster · Aug 4, 2015

I don't think you've given it enough time to decide if you are happy or not. You said you've been a nurse for three months. Three months as a nurse in one job is not enough, and it sounds like you are just starting a second job. It can take time to get proficient at a job... It also often requires experience to get to "better" nursing jobs.

Don't expect it to be easy or without stress. Learn and grow. There are many different types of nursing jobs. --Long-term care is not easy, but it will help you build some great time management skills. I think you should give it a couple years to develop and grow.

brandy1017, ASN, RN · Aug 4, 2015

I can't speak for everyone else, but I can speak for me. If I got paralyzed from the neck down tomorrow, 60% of my income from my long term disability insurance would not be enough to pay my bills. Knowing I cannot take care of myself if something happened to me at work makes me want to run around screaming and pull my hair out at all times. I want to be happy NOW, make all the money NOW, and have a million dollars in savings, and the thought that I don't have all of those things yet makes me absolutely crazy, and everything I waste money or time on gives me a constant guilt trip about what I could have done with that time or money that would have been more productive. And then I'm upset that I'm not happy.
Besides, every single one of us could be bumping up on retirement. It only takes one really good workplace accident, which could very well happen tomorrow. Not to be overly pessimistic or anything, but I couldn't imagine just being okay with coasting like everything's going to be alright and relaxing at this stage in my life. I'm way too financially vulnerable.

I understand where you are coming from. I really think nurses need to make a plan to protect themselves from being injured by planning to get a job away from the bedside, especially ICU nurses since most usually work without even a CNA to help with all the physical work! Why not go back to school and get your NP then you can use your brain and not your body! You would have a better work environment, much lower risk of being injured and I think a better quality of life! Let bedside nursing be a paid residency while you get your NP. In the meantime, make use of all the equipment you can to protect your back. Hovermats are great! Don't lift people if you can help it, make sure you have adequate staff before moving someone even in bed. Get those hovermats! They really make the difference.

As to personal finance take a class or read up such as Personal Finance for Dummies by Eric Tyson and Deal with your Debt by Liz Weston. Make a budget 50% needs, 20% savings & debt repyament, 30% wants is one suggestion. Start a Roth IRA because it can be used as an emergency fund in a pinch. In the meantime, build up your credit score, Liz Weston even has a book Your Credit Score, discover offers free monthly credit scores to its members. Get several credit cards, use them wisely and they can be an emergency fund in a pinch as long as you don't overuse them or max them out. Liz Weston has great personal financial advice I especially like her book on dealing with debt and how to maintain maximum financial flexibility as you pay down your debts.