Was I being mean-by not handing over all my notes??????

[missgigius]

One of my classmates came to me about a week and a half ago and asked for my phone #, she stated that she had a question to ask me?

(A little background, this is a girl who doesn't speak to me. In the past she's asked to see my notes right before exams.)

Anyway she calls me today (finals are tomorrow) and asks if she can have all my notes sent to her email so she can study them (I type all of my lecture notes). She said she has anemia and been sleeping all the time (I noticed her sleeping in class). After thinking about, I sad no. If she wanted to study w/me or have me help her with a area that she was having difficulty, I would have done it. But to just hand over my notes, my work so she can have "cliff-notes" to the class, NO. I am sorry.

But was that mean?

[skittlebear]

Well, I took the final today and the girl that I sent some of my notes to, walked passed about 3 or 4 times. Not only did she not say thank you, she didn't even speak. Oh well, lesson learned!

Now, that was very rude! I would definitely not give her any notes in the future. The least she could do is say thanks.

[pooshx2]

this is just my opinion, but there seems to be quite a bit of judgement going on against your fellow classmates. maybe i feel a bit like the person who asked for the notes as i have done so in the past, but it isn't b/c i don't do the work myself. this semester i found myself in the position that i felt i needed to ask someone (who i don't really care for or hang out with) for their notes. she does well in class though. i did really poorly on two of five exams this semester. i had done all of the prep work, but still did poorly. i found that looking at her notes helped me b/c there was info she put in her notes that i had left out. often, there were exam questions on the material that she put in her notes that i had left out. i type up my notes and study guides and she only handwrites hers. i still took her notes and typed them up, which is a big part of my learning process. it was very difficult for me to approach her to ask for her notes. i did thank her.

also, regarding whether you "feel someone is trying": the classmate i asked for her to share the notes with me, did not think i did any of the learning objectives on my own and still gave them to me. i found out after the final that she didn't know i did my own stuff. she found out b/c another student who i shared my notes with and have for the past 2 semesters came up and thanked me for my cardiac study guide that i put together. about 10 questions on the final had info that came from my study guide, that wasn't a learning objective, but i put it on there b/c i thought it was important info that i just wanted to know for later on. i also skip class sometimes. i have an hour and 20 minute drive one way to class and sometimes i feel it is more productive for me to spend the time reading and running through nclex books for questions, than to make the trip to class.

i know this is a lengthy post, but i just wanted to give you the perspective of someone who has been humbled enough to have to ask for help and thankful for a person that was willing to help even though she probably doesn't care for me as a person. i am thankful to all the fellow students who have shared their info and experiences with me and hopefully someone out there is thankful for me and my info. i think that nursing school is hard enough and that we should help each other instead of having a me vs. them attitude.

just my $0.02 worth!

[stuffbubby541]

Hell no you were not mean. I have a woman who was talking to me at the beginning of the semester and now she does not speak at all. We were in the process of having our final and I purchased Barron's anatomy flash cards...she comes over and picks the card from desk and I told her i was in the middle of studying and she just proceeded to ignore me. I was so :angryfire:angryfire:angryfire:angryfire:angryfire:angryfire:angryfire:angryfire:angryfire. Unfortunately, I have such a giving heart. But I'm getting tougher!!! In our nursing class, we have some selfish people. I don't know what the big competition is....but when it is all said and done whether u are a 90 student or a 75 student...we all must face the state boards to get licensed.....and it just bothers me how people in nursing school act!

So back to your actions, I would turn her down myself. Another issue came up, one my of fundamentals instructor gave us some terms to look up. I work hard on these terms...besides other homework, I stayed up late. So here comes a student, "oh, did u do the terms, for homework? I reply, yes. They ask, can I see yours...I say, oh, I can't find it right now...I think I left it home.....(of course I lied)....I'm not giving someone my work that I stayed up till 1/2 am in the morning to do ABSOLUTELY NOT:madface::madface::madface:

These actions show me that you are a slaker and you'll be like that when you go to a unit in a hosptal and "pretend" to work. And everyone is working their tails off. I can't go for that at all!:uhoh3:

Take care,

Stuff

[flightnurse2b, LPN]

theres a few in my class who are out all the time, dont take notes, and pass the tests by the skin of their teeth. a few friends and i take really good notes, and the 4 of us divide the chapters and type them, and this works really well for us. but every week these students started to depend on our notes and didnt even bother taking their own anymore. so we stopped giving them out. you will be amazed who is your friend when they want something! so our alternative was that we offered them to join our weekly study group at the library and we would review with them and answer any questions they had. as long as they make an effort they can have the notes. but they never show up, and when they ask for the notes... now the answer is a flat out no. if we offer them help, and they dont take it, then we arent doing them any service by doing their reading and note taking for them.....

i dont think you are mean at all. no one is going to be there to take the nclex for them right?? so if they dont want to have the study skills now... they wont use them when it really matters.

just my 0.02

[KyPinkRN]

this is just my opinion, but there seems to be quite a bit of judgement going on against your fellow classmates. maybe i feel a bit like the person who asked for the notes as i have done so in the past, but it isn't b/c i don't do the work myself. this semester i found myself in the position that i felt i needed to ask someone (who i don't really care for or hang out with) for their notes. she does well in class though. i did really poorly on two of five exams this semester. i had done all of the prep work, but still did poorly. i found that looking at her notes helped me b/c there was info she put in her notes that i had left out. often, there were exam questions on the material that she put in her notes that i had left out. i type up my notes and study guides and she only handwrites hers. i still took her notes and typed them up, which is a big part of my learning process. it was very difficult for me to approach her to ask for her notes. i did thank her.

also, regarding whether you "feel someone is trying": the classmate i asked for her to share the notes with me, did not think i did any of the learning objectives on my own and still gave them to me. i found out after the final that she didn't know i did my own stuff. she found out b/c another student who i shared my notes with and have for the past 2 semesters came up and thanked me for my cardiac study guide that i put together. about 10 questions on the final had info that came from my study guide, that wasn't a learning objective, but i put it on there b/c i thought it was important info that i just wanted to know for later on. i also skip class sometimes. i have an hour and 20 minute drive one way to class and sometimes i feel it is more productive for me to spend the time reading and running through nclex books for questions, than to make the trip to class.

i know this is a lengthy post, but i just wanted to give you the perspective of someone who has been humbled enough to have to ask for help and thankful for a person that was willing to help even though she probably doesn't care for me as a person. i am thankful to all the fellow students who have shared their info and experiences with me and hopefully someone out there is thankful for me and my info. i think that nursing school is hard enough and that we should help each other instead of having a me vs. them attitude.

just my $0.02 worth!

i too had a lengthy drive to class, and sometimes skipped to be more productive... the fact that i did so made me less inclined to ask others for their notes. i didn't think it was fair. but i always helped other students when they needed it.

[pooshx2]

i think i should clarify something here. our lectures are videotaped and so i am able to watch them at home on my computer. also, my poor grades that i am referring to were an 80 and 81. i ended up with a high b in the class. i always watched any skipped lectures, which i also would take notes from. my asking for the notes was simply because i was not writing things down that she did. granted, there were many times that i felt she wrote too much down, but when i looked at her notes, i just filtered that stuff out. i was mainly looking for any topics that i simply had absolutely nothing written down about. when i would find something that i had nothing about and she did, even if she only had one word written down then i would go to the text and read up on that item/topic. i really feel that everyone would benefit from sharing with each other, b/c you are bound to miss something when note taking. i do well to watch the lecture, whether in class or at home twice. once when i take notes, then once just to absorb the info. before we had recordings of our lectures, i did the same thing with my voice recorder.

[pengoo2008]

I personally would not just give my notes away to someone who I don't talk to in class. The way she asked for your number and called you up at the last minute with a sorry excuse just SCREAMS to me that she is trying to take advantage of you. I would share my notes with more people but I don't want to be walked all over, which is unfortunately what happens when you help people out of a bind continually that do not know how to help themselves (IE: STUDY).

I usually split up chapters with a few friends, but for some tests we don't do this. I've had a few times where I have had notes done on my own and my friend hasn't had any and I have shared what I have with her and she has done the same to me too.

[JustinTJ, ADN, BSN]

this is going to sound really harsh, but i have zero tolerance for stupid or lazy people. nursing is a job where you have people's lives in your hands. this education is not supposed to be easy.

if someone isn't dedicated enough to do the work themselves, then i am not inclined to help them. i don’t want a nurse working with me that can’t pass the classes or i'm going to be doing their work in the hospital too. i sure don’t want one taking care of me when i’m ill.

there are exceptions to this rule, and i have helped out people in legitimate situations. on the other hand, there are quite a few 19 year olds that don't come to class and want my help when it's time for tests. i don't give it.

find a good partner that you can trust. i teamed up with another mature student this semester and we will be going thru the program together. help people that deserve it (not every test), but don’t give away the farm to people who don’t even try.

[OgopogoLPN, LPN, RN]

No, I don't think you were being mean. YOU did the work to take the notes, YOU paid attention in class. This girl can't be bothered to talk to you otherwise, but will when she needs something from you.

There's only a few classmates who I would share my notes with if they needed it. I would not share mine with the classmates who seem lazy, dont' show up and don't seem to care.

Side note: another girl and I are probably in the top 4 in our class and we get along great. We were studying a final together and she had AMAZING study notes for this final. She handed them to me and asked me to look them over to see if I could spot any errors. I commented at how thorough her notes were and she offered for me to go photocopy them for myself. I thanked her, but I couldn't do it. I could tell how many hours she put into them and I wouldn't have felt right by just photocopying them when she did all the work.

It all worked out OK though as I got 97% of that final and I think she got 98%

[jemommyRN]

Well, consider the fact that students just got kicked out of school for sharing notes, I don't think you were being mean at all. You have to cover your butt, especially if this is not someone you study with on a regular basis.

[onyx77]

There is no way that I would have sent her the notes. If she were absent for a class and needed your notes for that day, then I would have. But right before the final? NO WAY! That is something that she should have thought about earlier in the semester - anemia or not.

[oneofHIs]

No way Hosea!!! I've had the same experience. I make good grades (all A's) because I work hard for them. I made a lot of charts for my A&P class to help organize so much material, I actually had one girl ask to BUY my notes from me!!!!!! I told her I had to politely decline (on the outside....on the inside I was saying "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? You never speak to me and now you want my notes? FORGET IT!)