Was I being mean-by not handing over all my notes??????

kcochrane · Mar 3, 2008

i totally agree with u by helping one out doesn't mean that they are going to be a lazy nurse skating by while the other nurses do their work because that is just not possible and truthfully i've never seen nurses skating by while everyone else is doing their work

i've seen it at the rn, lpn and cna level. on the most part we all work together to get the job done. but i have experienced the people that do get away with doing nothing or close to it. the problem that if it is enabled by those higher up, there's not much you can do about it. it really is too bad, because nursing is one of those things that is a team effort and is so much fun when everyone is working together.

APBT mom, LPN, RN · Mar 3, 2008

like i mentioned before what goes around comes around 10 fold ,please believe it . and yes u do what u want we all do what we want. i was simply giving my opinion like u asked so if u didn't want to hear you should have never asked the ?.
the fact of the matter is - we are all on allnurses to talk with one another and also at times agreeing to disagree and this is one of those times, so have a good one

i have no problem lending my notes or helping anyone in my class out if they need it but not for the reason that the op referenced.

there's a perfect example of one of the reasons you don't give someone your notes above. if that was you would you give that person your notes a second time? i don't know how far you are in your program but you will see people in class that will do things like this and the saying you give an inch and they'll take a mile will come into play. i hope you don't get taken advantage of.

i also wasn't the person who asked the question.

i agree no one has to agree with anything that you or i post but your approach to giving your opinion was attacking.

thanks for wishing me a good one. i'm graduating on thursday doing the things in the advice that i've given.

APBT mom, LPN, RN · Mar 3, 2008

I don't know, I just hope you all are not like this as nurses. Because when you are nurses you need to all help each other. Although I can understand that school is a competition and I wouldn't want to share my notes with someone that is lazy either, but just please don't be like that when you are out on the floor with us. I wrote a Cardiovascular handbook to help new nurses and student nurses on my floor. I give it to everyone whether I liked them or not.

I have no problem giving someone help when they honestly need it but when people are ungrateful for my help or abuse my help by asking for the same things (notes in this case) without trying to improve themselves and doing it to take the easy way out then they won't get my help anymore. This is done irregardless to me liking them or not. When I'm working it's the same way and the only thing that would make me help after this was done is if they were putting the patient(s) at risk.

MiaKeaRN · Mar 3, 2008

Personally, I will give my notes to the people I see really working hard to get a good grade. Out of a class of 30 people, there are about 20 who I would give the shirt off my back because they give 150% effort all the time.

There are, however, more than a few people who I would never share my hard work with....the ones who choose to go to the bar and brag about how much they party and the ones who cram study 2-3 days before a test because they don't want to be bothered or cannot be disciplined enough to study on a consistent basis. I work 45+ hours per week, am anemic, and yet still find a way to study hard, organize my notes, and maintain a B average. Maybe I'm stingy, maybe it will come around and get me 10-fold when I am a nurse, but I was raised that you work hard for what you want. The slackers will always be slackers, whether we are in school or on a unit......I'd rather work with the people who chose not to slack off in school.

Miami NightNurse · Mar 3, 2008

Personally, I will give my notes to the people I see really working hard to get a good grade. Out of a class of 30 people, there are about 20 who I would give the shirt off my back because they give 150% effort all the time.
There are, however, more than a few people who I would never share my hard work with....the ones who choose to go to the bar and brag about how much they party and the ones who cram study 2-3 days before a test because they don't want to be bothered or cannot be disciplined enough to study on a consistent basis. I work 45+ hours per week, am anemic, and yet still find a way to study hard, organize my notes, and maintain a B average. Maybe I'm stingy, maybe it will come around and get me 10-fold when I am a nurse, but I was raised that you work hard for what you want. The slackers will always be slackers, whether we are in school or on a unit......I'd rather work with the people who chose not to slack off in school.

No you are right. I was hoping the slackers wouldn't make it through Nursing school but you are right if you help them they might and believe me The Nursing Profession does not need slackers!!!

caroladybelle, BSN, RN · Mar 3, 2008

One of my classmates came to me about a week and a half ago and asked for my phone #, she stated that she had a question to ask me?
(A little background, this is a girl who doesn't speak to me. In the past she's asked to see my notes right before exams.)
Anyway she calls me today (finals are tomorrow) and asks if she can have all my notes sent to her email so she can study them (I type all of my lecture notes). She said she has anemia and been sleeping all the time (I noticed her sleeping in class). After thinking about, I sad no. If she wanted to study w/me or have me help her with a area that she was having difficulty, I would have done it. But to just hand over my notes, my work so she can have "cliff-notes" to the class, NO. I am sorry.
But was that mean?

Yes, it was mean.

Just as mean as the parent that does not permit their children to sneak alcoholic drinks before they are of age.

Just as mean as the parent that "forces" their children to eat vegetables and other healthy foods rather than junk.

Just as mean as the law officer that tickets people for speeding or running red lights even though "it is the first and only time, I did this!!!".

Just as mean as the employee that gets reprimanded by their boss for being late 50% of the time, even though "my alarm clock doesn't work/my kids were whiny/I am not sleeping well".

This classmate is a user - if they had a problem with "anemia", they should have spoken up at the beginning of the term. They also should have nurtured a relationship with someone for this issue. Instead, they sleep through and then lean on someone that they do not know well because they see him/her taking good notes.

They also should have asked in person. S/he obviously knew what she wanted when she got the phone number....and yet didn't have the grace to ask you face to face. Not to mention, it would be easier to ask for copies rather than email. That was very poor form.

You will find, in school and in life, their are users and there are those with a legitimate need. Differentiating between the two can be difficult and you have to make the choice on whether to help or not. And that is up to you.

But don't ever let being seen as "mean" influence you from doing what you think is right for you.

"Mean" is often a good thing.

Editorial Team / Admin · Mar 3, 2008

Thread closed for staff review.