I have been to nursing school twice already. Failed one time and starting again. I'm now in my second semester and I'm doing much better. My grades are at the top of my class. My problem is that I don't want to be a nurse. It's never been my dream to, nor do I plan on staying in nursing. It's all to make my parents happy, and I hate that they say how proud they are of me for doing it, but it makes me feel ugly inside because I'm not proud of myself. I want to become a graphic artist because it's what I've been doing all my life. I LOVE it! It's my passion! I've been working as a freelancer and I don't make a lot of money doing it, but I really don't care.
Unfortunately, my parents won't pay for me to get a degree in that because they say that it's not a practical career. I see what they're talking about because they want what's best for me, but I am miserable doing something I don't love. I've become depressed because of how I've been feeling my life is headed: the wrong direction. I live at home, my parents control everything that I do, and I have a 10 PM curfew only because they are paying for school. I'm 23 years old. I don't want to live at home anymore, and I definitely don't want to be in nursing school. My other problem is that i'm afraid that if I quit, my parents will throw me out and I will be living in a world that's new to me. They've paid for everything all my life and I don't know what it's like to fend for myself. I also hate myself for not finishing school yet and that's also another reason why I stay in school. I also stay because I feel bad that they've paid for all that schooling. Not only am I depressed, but it's made me lose confidence in myself and made me insecure.
What should I do? I feel like my life is going no where. Any advice? Anyone ever quit nursing school? What are you doing now?
Okay still is gonna sound stupid... But seriously take the next thing I say VERY VERY seriously.
YOLO.
Hahaha it's a dumb hipster statement but it has SO MUCH MEANING.
This is your life, no one else's. do what you want, money is NOTHING in this life. Our parents are from a different time where money was really important, now? It's not.
While I don't think you should be a nurse if you really hate it, I think you are almost half way through and would feel sick at wasting that time, money, and education - you have your education paid for - and you can work 2-3 days a week as a nurse (there are many options (administration?) and pursue your dream long term and have a means to support yourself (independence) in the mean time.
If you want independence, you have to be on your own. If you are in your parents home, while they pay for everything, it is totally different!!!
This is a tough decision and dynamic for sure!!! Best of luck making a decision that is right for YOU!
1) you a filling a spot of someone who truly wants to be there.
2) You are potentially wasting your parents money by having no plans of practicing nursing or enjoying it.
And most importantly,
3) As a nurse, I am passionate and excited about my career, I feel so blessed to do what I do and I would absolutely hate to see a coworker not have that same passion. I would be horrified as a patient to have somebody provide care who had no emotional connection or passion for such an intimate, emotionally charged career.
Use it as a paycheck until your "passion" becomes good enough to pay the bills. Passions often change, by the way.
Too bad you've taken up 2 spots now that others would kill for, but that's life. Finish your stuff and move on with your life. You won't regret having a great career to fall back on, even if you do indeed end up ditching it.
Let me ask, though -- is this program you're in BSN or ADN?
My REALITY:
It's painfully obvious you've probably already made up your mind. You're just looking for someone to make you feel better about a decision you are scared to make. [wo]man up, make the decision and deal with the consequences. You sound like someone who needs to get kicked out of home, to be honest -- you have tuition paid for and a great career to fall back on, but you don't want to spend 2 measly years of your life finishing it because you'd rather do graphic design? It honestly makes me sick. Your impatience is overwhelming me, darn it. Do you even realize the areas of nursing you could go into while augmenting your career in graphic design that are NOTHING like your experience in clinicals? Have you taken two seconds to consider the options here OBJECTIVELY?
You are sitting on a winning lottery ticket. A career, parents helping you out, and a way to fund your passion in life of graphic design... but you are looking for random strangers on the internet to validate your excuse for quitting.
I know I'm being harsh, by God and I mean to. Get your act together and act like a 23 year old young [wo]man! I wish you the best!
Yo, you sound like I did halfway through nursing school, suddenly I was like "this SUCKS!"
I wasn't living with my parents or in my 20s. I was in my 30s and left a cushy job in IT for a brutal BSN program on a federal obligation scholarship, so I DEFINITELY know the feeling of feeling trapped in nursing school with your heart not in it and sinking fast.
I hung on and finished. I knew I'd never be in a position again in life where my tuition and expenses were mostly paid, didn't have to work much and could just focus on finishing a degree for free. I HATED school and HATED having to be under be thumb of my scholarship agency and watched like a hawk. I was MISERABLE. But, listen: I'm a firm believer that no full life is lived in total comfort. You have to experience hard work, some suffering, some misery, some pain & heartbreak or you are NOT LIVING! That is all part of the human experience. So school sucks donkey kong for a couple years, so what? Just finish, because it's highly unlikely you'll ever have this logistic opportunity again.
Also, you don't have to love nursing to be good at it. I hate it! But: I'm really, REALLY good at it. And the world needs good nurses, BADLY! So take a altruistic approach and see nursing as stewardship to your fellow humans who are sick, and to the profession, which needs good people to represent it. Do the stuff you "love" on your own time. I hate nursing but I know I'm good at it and the world needs it, so that's what I do for a job. I pursue my hobbies and passions outside of that. And for a job I don't love, that I happen to be good at, that's needed - it pays pretty well! NOT BAD!
And consider this: your clinicals provide SUCH a limited view of the scope of nursing. I don't wear scrubs, work in a hospital or even see my patients! I work in case management. I wear business clothes and work in an office and call patients to talk with them about care plans and with doctors to coordinate care. I don't punch a clock, give shots, clean wounds or wipe butts! Nope. Sure, I put my time in doing that stuff to get here but I lived to tell about it. And now I have the stability, money and free time to do the stuff I love outside of work.
Quit your whining. Stick with it and don't waste your time, brains or parent's money any more. Grit your teeth, toughen up, own your choices, graduate and get the hell out of there. Do graphic design on your own time. The world needs good nurses NOW.
Yo, you sound like I did halfway through nursing school, suddenly I was like "this SUCKS!"
I wasn't living with my parents or in my 20s. I was in my 30s and left a cushy job in IT for a brutal BSN program on a federal obligation scholarship, so I DEFINITELY know the feeling of feeling trapped in nursing school with your heart not in it and sinking fast.
I hung on and finished. I knew I'd never be in a position again in life where my tuition and expenses were mostly paid, didn't have to work much and could just focus on finishing a degree for free. I HATED school and HATED having to be under be thumb of my scholarship agency and watched like a hawk. I was MISERABLE. But, listen: I'm a firm believer that no full life is lived in total comfort. You have to experience hard work, some suffering, some misery, some pain & heartbreak or you are NOT LIVING! That is all part of the human experience. So school sucks donkey kong for a couple years, so what? Just finish, because it's highly unlikely you'll ever have this logistic opportunity again.
Also, you don't have to love nursing to be good at it. I hate it! But: I'm really, REALLY good at it. And the world needs good nurses, BADLY! So take a altruistic approach and see nursing as stewardship to your fellow humans who are sick, and to the profession, which needs good people to represent it. Do the stuff you "love" on your own time. I hate nursing but I know I'm good at it and the world needs it, so that's what I do for a job. I pursue my hobbies and passions outside of that. And for a job I don't love, that I happen to be good at, that's needed - it pays pretty well! NOT BAD!
And consider this: your clinicals provide SUCH a limited view of the scope of nursing. I don't wear scrubs, work in a hospital or even see my patients! I work in case management. I wear business clothes and work in an office and call patients to talk with them about care plans and with doctors to coordinate care. I don't punch a clock, give shots, clean wounds or wipe butts! Nope. Sure, I put my time in doing that stuff to get here but I lived to tell about it. And now I have the stability, money and free time to do the stuff I love outside of work.
Quit your whining. Stick with it and don't waste your time, brains or parent's money any more. Grit your teeth, toughen up, own your choices, graduate and get the hell out of there. Do graphic design on your own time. The world needs good nurses NOW.
Omg!!!!!! If you could see me now you would see me standing up clapping and yelling "YESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!" I need to screenshot the realness u have presented to refer back to when I'm in the program and things get tough.
Yo, you sound like I did halfway through nursing school, suddenly I was like "this SUCKS!"
I wasn't living with my parents or in my 20s. I was in my 30s and left a cushy job in IT for a brutal BSN program on a federal obligation scholarship, so I DEFINITELY know the feeling of feeling trapped in nursing school with your heart not in it and sinking fast.
I hung on and finished. I knew I'd never be in a position again in life where my tuition and expenses were mostly paid, didn't have to work much and could just focus on finishing a degree for free. I HATED school and HATED having to be under be thumb of my scholarship agency and watched like a hawk. I was MISERABLE. But, listen: I'm a firm believer that no full life is lived in total comfort. You have to experience hard work, some suffering, some misery, some pain & heartbreak or you are NOT LIVING! That is all part of the human experience. So school sucks donkey kong for a couple years, so what? Just finish, because it's highly unlikely you'll ever have this logistic opportunity again.
Also, you don't have to love nursing to be good at it. I hate it! But: I'm really, REALLY good at it. And the world needs good nurses, BADLY! So take a altruistic approach and see nursing as stewardship to your fellow humans who are sick, and to the profession, which needs good people to represent it. Do the stuff you "love" on your own time. I hate nursing but I know I'm good at it and the world needs it, so that's what I do for a job. I pursue my hobbies and passions outside of that. And for a job I don't love, that I happen to be good at, that's needed - it pays pretty well! NOT BAD!
And consider this: your clinicals provide SUCH a limited view of the scope of nursing. I don't wear scrubs, work in a hospital or even see my patients! I work in case management. I wear business clothes and work in an office and call patients to talk with them about care plans and with doctors to coordinate care. I don't punch a clock, give shots, clean wounds or wipe butts! Nope. Sure, I put my time in doing that stuff to get here but I lived to tell about it. And now I have the stability, money and free time to do the stuff I love outside of work.
Quit your whining. Stick with it and don't waste your time, brains or parent's money any more. Grit your teeth, toughen up, own your choices, graduate and get the hell out of there. Do graphic design on your own time. The world needs good nurses NOW.
This was everything! You just received great advice from someone who has been there.
Omg!!!!!! If you could see me now you would see me standing up clapping and yelling "YESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!" I need to screenshot the realness u have presented to refer back to when I'm in the program and things get tough.
I actually used to be a graphic designer, so I'd like to offer my perspective.
Art and design may be a passion of yours, but at the end of the day, graphic design is a desk job like any other. There's a lot more involved than just designing, most of which can be boring. It can also be very a very frustrating to be a person who loves art and design and making things, because you spend a lot of your day arguing over font choices and trying to find places to fit even more type into your piece, because your clients aren't designers and don't understand the first thing about design. You're not making things for you, you're making them to make someone else (who isn't a designer) happy, which will make you want to pull your hair out.
Also, most people who go into graphic design envision themselves working at a big advertising agency, a cool little design firm, or even having a successful freelance business. The reality is, most end up getting a job in a sign shop making billboards and those little signs you see stuck in the grass on the side of the highway, or as an in-house designer at some company who needs someone to make all of their (boring looking) brochures and edit information on their website. Those definitely aren't the only options, but there is a GOOD chance that's where you'll be right out of school, especially if you don't have major connections at a design firm. There were several people in my class that ended up with jobs they liked, but well over half either are still in these low paying, unrewarding design jobs, OR never found any sort of design job and are working in the service industry.
I'm not saying all of this to you to try and stomp on something you love, I just wanted to emphasize the fact that having a full time job as a graphic designer is often times very different than making art on your own and doing occasional freelance projects. I'm going to graduate from nursing school in less than a month, and even though there were times when I was unsure, I can say now that it's been the best decision I've made so far. Not only that, but when I get my first job I will be making more money starting out than my former classmates who have been in that industry for five or six years already, and I'm not even expecting to make a ton of money. Nursing isn't about the money, but I definitely don't mind the fact that you can make a decent living doing it. I know you said you don't care about money, but (I know this is going to sound condescending, but it's really not meant to be) it's a lot easier to say that when you're living with your parents and don't have all that many bills to pay. Trust me, I've been there!!
Either way, the bottom line is that you're the only one who really knows what's best for you. It's a great idea to get opinions from both sides, but no one, including your parents, should be able to decide how you're going to spend your life. My personal opinion is that you should finish school, because you may realize that you like being a nurse, and you can definitely still pursue your passion when you're not at work!! But if you decide not to continue with school, your parents won't be mad at you forever, or probably even that long. Good luck!
I actually used to be a graphic designer, so I'd like to offer my perspective.
Art and design may be a passion of yours, but at the end of the day, graphic design is a desk job like any other. There's a lot more involved than just designing, most of which can be boring. It can also be very a very frustrating to be a person who loves art and design and making things, because you spend a lot of your day arguing over font choices and trying to find places to fit even more type into your piece, because your clients aren't designers and don't understand the first thing about design. You're not making things for you, you're making them to make someone else (who isn't a designer) happy, which will make you want to pull your hair out.
Also, most people who go into graphic design envision themselves working at a big advertising agency, a cool little design firm, or even having a successful freelance business. The reality is, most end up getting a job in a sign shop making billboards and those little signs you see stuck in the grass on the side of the highway, or as an in-house designer at some company who needs someone to make all of their (boring looking) brochures and edit information on their website. Those definitely aren't the only options, but there is a GOOD chance that's where you'll be right out of school, especially if you don't have major connections at a design firm. There were several people in my class that ended up with jobs they liked, but well over half either are still in these low paying, unrewarding design jobs, OR never found any sort of design job and are working in the service industry.
I'm not saying all of this to you to try and stomp on something you love, I just wanted to emphasize the fact that having a full time job as a graphic designer is often times very different than making art on your own and doing occasional freelance projects. I'm going to graduate from nursing school in less than a month, and even though there were times when I was unsure, I can say now that it's been the best decision I've made so far. Not only that, but when I get my first job I will be making more money starting out than my former classmates who have been in that industry for five or six years already, and I'm not even expecting to make a ton of money. Nursing isn't about the money, but I definitely don't mind the fact that you can make a decent living doing it. I know you said you don't care about money, but (I know this is going to sound condescending, but it's really not meant to be) it's a lot easier to say that when you're living with your parents and don't have all that many bills to pay. Trust me, I've been there!!
Either way, the bottom line is that you're the only one who really knows what's best for you. It's a great idea to get opinions from both sides, but no one, including your parents, should be able to decide how you're going to spend your life. My personal opinion is that you should finish school, because you may realize that you like being a nurse, and you can definitely still pursue your passion when you're not at work!! But if you decide not to continue with school, your parents won't be mad at you forever, or probably even that long. Good luck!
I think what was said above is, by far, the best advice I've seen so far regarding this issue.
I'd like to add the following for the OP: please consider seeking advice from professional counselors - one that can help you decide what career path you should follow (based on your abilities AND interests), and another to help you deal with personal/emotional issues. What I'm seeing as the root cause for your stress and anxiety is your current relationship with your parents. A lot of folks here are saying how lucky you are to have parents that care - because they're providing a roof over your head and paying your tuition; but what I'm seeing (please correct me if I'm wrong) is controlling behavior on the part of your folks... especially with them imposing a 10pm curfew on their ADULT child. You have anxiety about discussing your future with them, and you're afraid to go out into the world on your own and start making real, adult decisions. It sounds like you (and/or your parents) have created a situation where you're just a dependent on them as you were when you were a young child or teenager.
It's great to have the support of family (side note: I wouldn't be where I am today had it not been for mine. They were there for me when I suddenly had to move back home 3 years after graduated from college, and had to start over; I'm now married, living with my husband on our own, and embarking on a new career.). But there's a fine line between SUPPORT and CONTROL. A professional counselor will help you sort through these issues - without the bias of they're own personal experiences/issue (e.g. "Oh, if I can do it, you can do it!"; "Suck it up!").
If you don't mind me asking, what's your cultural/ethnic background? Sometimes, this can reveal a lot about family dynamics.
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crossfitnurse
364 Posts
Okay still is gonna sound stupid... But seriously take the next thing I say VERY VERY seriously.
YOLO.
Hahaha it's a dumb hipster statement but it has SO MUCH MEANING.
This is your life, no one else's. do what you want, money is NOTHING in this life. Our parents are from a different time where money was really important, now? It's not.
FLY GIRL!!! Do what you love!