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Unfairness at work

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by Loveishope1970 Loveishope1970 (New) New

I put in a request for PTO in July for 3 days off. I requested the days off because it is the day that I removed my son from life support after drowning. I wanted to go home and put flowers on his grave and see my other son. I received an email from my manager stating that he was not going to approve my pto time because she doesn't want to fill the holes with agency. I have a lot of pto and we lose it if we don't use it. I am frustrated and disappointed. I always pick up extra. I don't know what to do. Not being allowed to use pto, a benefit that I have earned, is a deal breaker for me.

Been there,done that, ASN, RN

Has 33 years experience.

I am so sorry for your loss. That is beyond unfairness, check with your state labor board about using/ losing PTO.

Of course it's a dealbreaker, they are trying to cheat you out of your hard earned PTO. Stop picking up extra and spend that time searching for a better place.

Peace, and good luck with your search.

Sour Lemon

Has 9 years experience.

8 hours ago, Loveishope1970 said:

I put in a request for PTO in July for 3 days off. I requested the days off because it is the day that I removed my son from life support after drowning. I wanted to go home and put flowers on his grave and see my other son. I received an email from my manager stating that he was not going to approve my pto time because she doesn't want to fill the holes with agency. I have a lot of pto and we lose it if we don't use it. I am frustrated and disappointed. I always pick up extra. I don't know what to do. Not being allowed to use pto, a benefit that I have earned, is a deal breaker for me.

This is a very common issue, unfortunately. I know a nurse who had to "break an arm" every year to go on vacation.

July is a very busy time for PTO requests. People put in requests a full year ahead if they're able to, but three days seems like something they should be able to accommodate.

Take care.

HiddencatBSN, BSN

Specializes in Peds ED. Has 10 years experience.

Call out sick next year.

It’s often hard to take PTO. You’re entitled to it but with short staffing and blackout dates a lot of facilities will make it impossible to actually take it. My current hospital does a good job but only because the union got involved. We pick blocks of vacation based on seniority and my manager is decent about approving single day quests outside of our block requests as long as we request them in advance.

I’m sorry for your loss.

amoLucia

Specializes in LTC.

4 hours ago, Sour Lemon said:

This is a very common issue, unfortunately. I know a nurse who had to "break an arm" every year to go on vacation.

July is a very busy time for PTO requests. People put in requests a full year ahead if they're able to, but three days seems like something they should be able to accommodate.

Take care.

Worked with a gal who always scheduled minor surgery each year around the holidays. Not terrible surgeries with complicated recovery issues, just minor enough to request the time off.

It was another co-worker who clued me in as we were looking at the holiday scheds. She made one of those tee-hee comments as she rolled her eyes!

Jedrnurse, BSN, RN

Specializes in school nurse. Has 29 years experience.

1 hour ago, amoLucia said:

Worked with a gal who always scheduled minor surgery each year around the holidays. Not terrible surgeries with complicated recovery issues, just minor enough to request the time off.

It was another co-worker who clued me in as we were looking at the holiday scheds. She made one of those tee-hee comments as she rolled her eyes!

Cool to have a "surgical ready-to-go repertoire"! Not cool to do that to your co-workers...

HiddencatBSN, BSN

Specializes in Peds ED. Has 10 years experience.

1 hour ago, amoLucia said:

Worked with a gal who always scheduled minor surgery each year around the holidays. Not terrible surgeries with complicated recovery issues, just minor enough to request the time off.

It was another co-worker who clued me in as we were looking at the holiday scheds. She made one of those tee-hee comments as she rolled her eyes!

I knew I was super burned out at my old job when I caught myself hoping that the surgery I’d had and wasn’t healing well from might need to be revised and I’d “get” another 6 week break 😕

speedynurse, ADN, RN, EMT-P

Specializes in ER, Pre-Op, PACU.

On 8/24/2020 at 3:38 AM, Loveishope1970 said:

I put in a request for PTO in July for 3 days off. I requested the days off because it is the day that I removed my son from life support after drowning. I wanted to go home and put flowers on his grave and see my other son. I received an email from my manager stating that he was not going to approve my pto time because she doesn't want to fill the holes with agency. I have a lot of pto and we lose it if we don't use it. I am frustrated and disappointed. I always pick up extra. I don't know what to do. Not being allowed to use pto, a benefit that I have earned, is a deal breaker for me.

I would be incredibly upset too if I was in your shoes. I have some coworkers that have had similar tragic deaths in their family and they NEED those few days off - it’s truly essential due to the past trauma and the need to be with the rest of their family. Can you call in sick? It’s not normally something I would suggest, but you deserve those days off because of your situation. I am so sorry - that is truly ridiculous that was denied.

brandy1017, ASN, RN

Specializes in Critical Care.

I don't understand why you can't take at least 3 days of bereavement leave?  I would call in as you may be too upset to work under the circumstances.   Clearly your mgr has no compassion.  But still we are all allowed bereavement leave.

Edited by brandy1017

rn1965, ADN

Specializes in Med/Surg, Women's Health, LTC. Has 25 years experience.

Too bad, so sad (for your manager). YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR SCHEDULING AND STAFFING.  Go to HR, tell them you requested time off well in advance and find out your rights.  Then if they still say no, ask them what the policy for paying out PTO will be.  You should not be forced to lose it when you cannot use it!

Next best option -- call in sick, from the plane!

JadedCPN, BSN, RN

Specializes in Pediatrics, Pediatric Float, PICU, NICU. Has 15 years experience.

I'm so sorry for your loss and understand your frustration right now.

I do think there are some things to consider; perhaps multiple other people already asked for and got approved for PTO during the same time frame since it is a very popular vacation request time. Perhaps multiple people requested and they only have X amount of slots (without having to use agency) so they went by seniority or who requested it first.

There could be a variety of valid reasons why it was denied, maybe speak to your manager about it to get further clarification. But this is definitely one of those scenarios would I would be calling out due to the circumstances. Just be careful that your unit doesn't have a policy against calling out on days PTO were denied.

Rose_Queen, BSN, MSN, RN

Specializes in OR, education. Has 16 years experience.

1 hour ago, brandy1017 said:

 

I don't understand why you can't take at least 3 days of bereavement leave

 

It sounds like this is an anniversary of loss, not a loss that just occurred. I’ve never worked anywhere that allowed bereavement leave to be used other than immediately at the time/funeral/memorial service. 

OP, I work with someone whose philosophy is “I’m not asking for time off I’m telling you when I’m not available to work”. Normally I wouldn’t support that philosophy, but in your case I think there’s an allowance to be made. However, moving forward it may be best to keep some facts in mind:

1. Request off as soon as you are allowed to do so. In my facility with the exception of Summer prime time, that’s one year in advance. 
2. If prime time does affect you for this time of year and time off, can you work with a coworker who is one of the first to be considered that they request off and then trade with you later to help you jump ahead in line?

Many people I've worked with are able to use their standing with the employer to get what they want without being forced to use underhanded excuses.  They just state they want certain time off, they get it.  Everyone else can go fly a kite according to those with the power over the schedule.  Just part of the advantages of being a favorite.

FolksBtrippin, BSN, RN

Specializes in Psychiatry, Pediatrics, Public Health.

I'm very sorry for your loss. 

If I were you, I would be bitter. 

Nurse managers are often shortsighted. This is the kind of thing that makes people quit.

PTO requests should generally be honored, especially since there are agency RNs available. If you give people the time off that they need, you have better nurse retention and need less agency anyway.

Sometimes the NM gets her bonus based on how under budget she is, and upper management isn't thinking about the effect that is having on employee retention. 

 

 

 

Aniche4u

Specializes in ER, Medical Surgery, Telemetry, Behavioral Health,. Has 21 years experience.

This is definitely considered a "Mental Health Day." Please look I to this. A mental health day is up to 3 days off with pay!

amoLucia

Specializes in LTC.

1 hour ago, Aniche4u said:

This is definitely considered a "Mental Health Day." Please look I to this. A mental health day is up to 3 days off with pay!

Where is this followed????? Jokingly, we've all called it a 'mental health' day when we just need a day off to unwind/crash/recoup etc. NEVER heard of anyone providing PTO for it, much less 3 days.

HiddencatBSN, BSN

Specializes in Peds ED. Has 10 years experience.

5 hours ago, amoLucia said:

Where is this followed????? Jokingly, we've all called it a 'mental health' day when we just need a day off to unwind/crash/recoup etc. NEVER heard of anyone providing PTO for it, much less 3 days.

You just call in sick. 

amoLucia

Specializes in LTC.

14 hours ago, HiddencatBSN said:

You just call in sick. 

Yes, I'd just call in sick for something.

But I was curious as it sounds like PP Aniche4u can really call in and call it 'mental health day' and take 3 PTO days! Never heard such a thing!