I'm posting a follow-up post to the last one. So my supervisor gave me a verbal warning in the form of a letter that detailed my various workplace sins. These included asking for too many days off, leaving early, arriving late, forgetting to pick up a blood sample, not using an interpreter, and being disrespectful.
Asking for too many days off: For December I took a nice 2 weeks of taking advantage of the holidays and just asked for some days in between. I was going through some medical stuff which caused me to at times ask for a day off at the last minute (2 days before the appointment for instance.)
Leaving early: This didn't happen as often, perhaps 3 times at most and always by checking with my supervisor. Granted this happened without advance notice and when I did leave it was due to medical appointments.
Arriving late: My start time was 6:30 am (a start time she said she never approved but nevertheless used it as a point of reference to count how many hours I arrived late on 3 occasions.) Once I arrived at 9:30 because I overslept having been up all night coughing a lung out. I was going to call out but decided against it. The other time my car refused to start and I ended up taking another car. I arrived at 8:45. The third time I had gone to a doctor's appointment and got there at 9:30. There was hardly anyone at the office because that particular day we had a department wide meeting. The fourth time I had another appointment and I got there around 8:20. All these times she knew about. All with 3 to 4 days notice beforehand. In her warning letter she stated that my team had suffered because of my tardy arrivals. I tried to confirm this with my co-workers and they were like "no, we were fine."
Anyway she agreed that we would meet again in 3 weeks to see if any improvement that been made. Well the date came around and that morning I asked her "so what time are we meeting today?" and she replied "Well it turns out that the HR director can't come today so we will reschedule it." She didn't give me a date and I left it at that. Mind you she's involved 3 other supervisors besides her.
At any rate we met a couple of weeks ago for the second time at which point she pointed out 2 times in which I arrived late. One happened because I missed the commuter bus and it only leaves every 45 minutes so of course I arrived 40 minutes late when I was supposed to arrive 40 minutes early. That same day that I arrived late I told her that the commuter bus left at 3:30 but that I was going to stay until the next one left, around 4:15. So she was like fine, but I could tell she wasn't too happy about it. She and I were working off site at that time and she's used to staying behind and having someone else bring back the blood samples to our main job site for processing. Since she had told me at the last minute that I was to work with her that day, I didn't make arrangements for someone to pick up my kids so that's why I ended up taking the commuter bus. At any rate she gave me a choice on two tasks and asked which one I wanted to work on. I picked one and she said that she'd do the other one and left to go work on it. Well I finished my task and asked her if she wanted me to do anything else, then she asked me to do the task that she was supposed to do. So I ended up doing both. She said that it was fine I could go so I did.
Anyway to make a long story short she wrote me up for the above mentioned things that also included not using an interpreter. She had earlier that day advised me to not walk into a non-English speaking patient's room b/c there was no interpreter. Of course I forgot and walked into his room, quickly realized that I shouldn't have done that and excused myself and left. Well she included this in her write up.
I feel like she wants me to be absolutely perfect and that there is no grace/understanding. So I decided that the next step would probably be me being fired so I asked HR what was the minimum leave of notice so as not to be blacklisted from the institution. They said 2 weeks, so I gave my 2 weeks notice. This job provides great benefits and I'm going to miss that. Thinking back I don't know if it would have been better to ask for a transfer and now perhaps it's too late. I have 2 weeks left on that job. A job that I enjoyed very much. My sister pointed out that I worked very hard to go through nursing school full-time while having kids and how I basically let it go for a difficult person.
No one seems to understand where I'm coming from except for my husband. He's heard me complain about this lady for months. He knows that I tried to get along with her. It seems that the perfect person for that position is someone who is used to putting their family in second place. Someone who is dedicated so much that they would spend 12 hours in one day if needed.
I used to work on the floor so I came from having 4 days off to working 5 days in a row. It was a huge adjustment. I supposedly took the job to have more time for my family but it turned out to not be the case. Where before I was spending 4 days with me kids now it was less. I earned more yes but the work was intense. I enjoyed it though. But having that supervisor was like tasting vinegar.. it didn't help to know that I didn't even have to be there. Hubby sometimes earns in one day what I earn in a month so I wasn't doing it for the money..
Now that this has happened I'm taking a step back and thinking about my choices. I've been thinking about preparing for the GRE and possibly starting school later this year. Or maybe working in another specialty, perhaps ICU.. I'm basically here to vent and to get feedback/advice. I have loans to pay off and not working right now would put them on hold but still their balances loom over me. I've paid a good bit off but I took out several.
Please don't tell me in your replies that you did your nursing degree with little to no debt, because saying that would help me how...??
Your post sounds like a lot of excuses. Late is late. Doesnt matter from what. As one off occurrences of your car not starting, sure, most people wont worry about that, but combined with multiple other late occurrences, "missing the bus", multiple unplanned doctor appointments and then being late when you supposed to be there presumably at a certain time sounds like a lot of lates and poor planning on your part. If you have a medical condition where you need a lot of doctor visits it would seem that applying for intermitent FMLA would have been a good option so these things can be planned if possible, or if not, you can use your FMLA based on your medical condition. But because thats not the case you have many absences. Are late, leaving early. Late because your sick? For gods sake either call out sick or arrive on time. So because of all that your boss is really paying attention to everything you do because it seems she cant really count on you so she is going to nit pick everything else.
This isnt a case of "my boss is unreasonable and shes targeting me", its a case of you not being responsible, not able to adapt to the new schedule like a grown adult with proper planning. These are all excuses.
"Your team says your lates aren't causing them grief is because they've learned to not depend on you and just try to work as if you aren't there so things get done. If you show up, bonus I guess?"
You want to maybe work in ICU or the hospital? All of the stuff you've pulled would never fly.You are on the floor at 7 am ready for report. 7:01 you are late and unprepared. Unplanned doctor visit in 2 days? Sorry schedule is out already, they dont make changes to accommodate you. You either try to make it on a day off, or you have to call in sick, unless you have FMLA. Too many call outs, your in job jeopardy.
Where I work 5 absences/lates a year, your getting a letter from HR to improve or start worrying about disciplinary action.
Everywhere I've ever worked as a nurse has always had a few employees that are such a pain in the butt that we consider it a good day when they're not there, no matter the reason. I suspect you are one of these. People who are doing their jobs get tired of all the drama and tired of working twice as hard to cover for your stupid mistakes. This is harsh (not too harsh for the site, I hope. I'm new here) but you need to hear the brutal truth if you're ever going to work anywhere and be successful.
I work with nurses like you and it drives me crazy because I end up taking your patient load when you are either late, leaving early or calling off for some irresponsible reason, like I can't even sympathize with you. Please take your job more serous in the future. Nurses are already working short staffed as it is.
Specializes in Mental Health, Gerontology, Palliative.
Thanks for the few helpful replies, others were entertaining :)
So the times that I was late was due to being sick, car not working, and surprise coming from doctors' appointments that she had given me permission to attend. So how does she give permission to arrive late then turn around and write me up for being late. hmm..
She gave you permission to sleep in and arrive three hours late?
The start time of a job is exactly that, the start time. Not an optional suggestion. The finish time is the finish time. You leave early and its putting pressure on your colleagues
I had and still have health problems (at one point I had emergent surgery and once I almost passed out) but the focus is on attendance, nevermind that I'm going through a health crisis. I didn't qualify for FMLA so that was out of the question.
I have health issues. Infact one day I ended up having to leave work with a temp of 39 degrees celcius. I ended up in hospital with sepsis and had to have emergency surgery and a hospital stay of almost a week.
If i need to see my GP, i make my appointments for my day off, or after I finish work. Its not my employers responsibility its mine
I will exit from this post now and will take away the kindness and understanding of nutella's post to name a few. You are right nutella I was pretty green coming into this discipline and am proud of myself for coming this far. I taught myself a great deal of things along the way since there was no formal training/orientation. It has all been a learning experience.
I'm going to suggest the best lesson possible. Its called personal responsibility. Its about looking at situations to see if there is anything we could do differently to get a better outcome.
Your employer is quite within their rights to expect you to show up at your starting time. If I dont show up on time, the nurse before me cant leave. They are more than within their rights to hold you accountable for your failure to do so.
And honestly I expected a better reply and attitude from fellow nurses, calling my husband pretty boy? Hilarious! So typical! Nice one! Mentioning HIS comment about jealousy?? Wow, what a mistake!
Good night and thanks for the well wishes :)
If you wanted people to enable your behavior, you have come to the wrong place.
From what you have shared your managers actions were deserved. If you want to continue in your nursing career take responsibility for your actions, show up when you are rostered to, stop leaving early. If sometime happens and you cant make it on time ring your work place and let them know you will be there as soon as you can
When one is out/late for medical reasons, usually it requires some sort of MD note. FMLA actually happens after so many hours one has worked, not the length of time. Otherwise, it can say in your handbook (that everyone signs as understood) that even legit medical absences are grounds for termination without FMLA.
If you have a chronic illness, and/or an illness that requires accommodations, then that is something you should speak with your MD about OP. Your boss had no obligation to say "yes" to your appointment needs. But that permission was granted then used against you, OP is troubling. It could have been a "no" right away, and if you were late because you went anyways, then that would be on you.
There always has to be a plan B as far as transportation. You can not always rely on public transportation. Further, if you are ill overnight, you need to be able to call out as opposed to a late show/no call.
Sounds to me as if you have medical issues that would perhaps require accommodations. Whether or not a job would honor those accommodations is an entirely different thread.
But what I get from this is that most of the time, your boss was "ok'ing" your appointments and the like, then used that against you. Which is another thing entirely.
You could be on a "do not rehire" for any number of reasons besides not giving a 2 week notice. I would at least provide HR with an MD note for your file. Not that I particularly relish HR being all up in my personal grill, however, if this is a chronic condition that will affect things going forward, any new employer will have to be in the loop.
I think there's a huge difference between chronically ill and the boss allowing appointments and "I am a special snowflake" who needs to sleep in until 10 am.......
You are lucky to have received just a verbal warning...my floor has let people go for much less. 2 weeks off during the holidays is just not realistic and not really fair to ask for unless you have arranged some type of long term leave. All of us would like to have time off during the holidays. All other issues aside, your post DOES describe a pattern of asking for too much time off, missing too many days, coming in late, leaving early. Your manager has an obligation to safely staff her floor and this behavior obstructs that.
I think the reason that your coworkers told you your tardiness and absences weren't a problem is because they didn't want to get into conflict with you, OP. It doesn't really matter what they think, anyway. In the final run, it's what your manager thinks and what your employer's policy is regarding attendance. Like several other posters have stated, had you worked where I worked, you would have been gone long already.
I don't think your manager is gunning for you, either. I think she is enforcing the attendance policy, which you seem to have a problem abiding by. If every nurse in your department came in late or left early or didn't come in at all like you did, your department would be in anarchy. And she isn't jealous of your husband...how funny!
If you get another job you are going to have to learn how to suck it up and go to work like other people do, and to do your job accurately. An employee with a lousy attendance record and a history of making mistakes is not a valuable employee.
Who really knows what the manager feels/thinks about OP's husband?
I agree coworkers could well be just trying to avoid conflict.
Even though I agree with OP's need to be at work on time and have about a 99% attendance rate, not being able to care for her medical situation is a very real problem for many people in the USA.
I read a book called something like "How We Do Harm", author is Otis Brawley, MD. One scenario he brings up (true) is a woman who put off care for breast Ca until the breast actually fell off. She then took it to the ER and asked to have it sewn back on.
The woman had a job. She got some sick time but it could be taken only in 8 hour chunks - no 2 or 3 or 4 hours at a time. Naturally, the few hours of sick time she had ran out pretty fast. A lot of jobs give only 1 day per month for sick time - so really only 2 weeks per year. And I guess her vacation or saved holiday time, if any, wasn't available or was also used up. And some places give only about 20 days per year of PTO to use however you wish, but even that is only about 26 days per year. For a Dx like Ca, it's really just not enough, even with weekends added.
The patient tried to cover up the necrotic smell as best she could, but the time came when she knew her attempts weren't successful. Not sure how she handled the pain. There is so much suffering in this world, in our land of milk and honey, and streets paved with gold. The pt might have been better off to quit the job if she couldn't get FMLA . Medicaid if eligible, SS Disability, long term Disability insurance if she had purchased it would have served her better than to try to be a good worker and let cancer eat her breast off.
Poverty.
Dear God, help us.
OP, don't let all the mud that's been slung on you get you down. You do need to start seeing work through your boss' eyes. Just pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again. (Nat King Cole - song of that name Youtube). Best to you, hope work and health improve.
The OP said she didn't qualify for FMLA, so either she hasn't worked long enough to be eligible for it, or her medical issues are not qualifying illnesses to make her eligible for it.
If her boss is miserable, it's because she has a highly unreliable employee who makes getting the work done more difficult. My guess is she couldn't care less about the OP's husband/home/marriage.
We don't really know anything about the boss. Maybe she's actually as jolly as old St. Nick. LOL
If she is miserable, we don't really know why. I'm sure OP has given her a couple of grey's, but maybe the boss is miserable for other reasons. We all likely have enough heartache to go around. And I actually meant boss might have a nasty personality, not that she is terribly unhappy. Whatever.
I didn't see OP's remarks on FMLA. Sorry I missed it.
We don't really know how boss feels about OP's home life, mate, etc.
I was once told " If you are early, you are on time. If you are on time you are late." We all have issues outside of work, however you were paid to be there and unfortunately you weren't. You are lucky they didn't let you go after the third time.
I also have to agree with the PP's that you made a lot of excuses as to why you couldn't get it together. Good luck in the future and take this as a lesson you needed to learn.
We don't really know how boss feels about OP's home life, mate, etc.
I guarantee you her boss doesn't give a fart in a high wind about any of it, other than how it impacts staffing and patient care.
OP is lucky she still has a job. As many occurances as she's had, she should have been WELL past the point of a verbal warning. That's generally the disciplinary action starting point.
OP needs to decide to either pull up her big girl panties, take responsibility for her own actions, stop making excuses and quit blaming everyone else for what's happening.
Or, if her health is that fragile, she needs to stay home and take care of herself. She apparently doesn't really need the money, and her co-workers would be much happier without her screwing things up for them by waltzing in late and taking time off at the last minute.
Health care is generally not a field with grace and understanding regarding "work place sins", especially if you are involved with direct patient care.
Perhaps look into some other areas of nursing with more flexibility. Good luck to you.
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Mentioning HIS comment about jealousy?? Wow, what a mistake! 
ambobam
44 Posts
I've never been late... Not once.
And the only day I've asked off for was a day I traded to attend granny's funeral...
Seems like you're trying to make excuses for your constant lateness and lay-offs...
It does not sound like she's being unreasonable