Things you'd LOVE to tell coworkers...and get away with it!

[General E. Speaking, RN]

Please don't label this thread "negative". It is meant to be fun.

Your scrubs are ugly.

I don't think you are "cute" when you get all googley-eyed and giggly around the young docs. I think it makes nurses look bad.

I cannot BELIEVE you were nominated for A Daisy Award! Did you nominate yourself?

It's called deodorant, use it.

Do your own assessment and stop badgering me for every single detail during report.

I swear I am going to put Ex Lax all over my lunch so the next time someone calls out for the runs, I will know it is you who keeps stealing my food!

Yes, my stethoscope is nice and it was expensive. Buy your own.

No time to help me turn my patient, huh? Yet, every time you need help, I have been there for you.

Your situational awareness sucks. While you are browsing the latest deals on the internet, I am drowning. Look around and help out your coworkers.

I'm happy you look rested and ready for your shift. Next time get here 15 minutes earlier so I can leave on time and be rested and ready for you.

No, you don't ALWAYS get the crappy assignment. I don't think you'd be happy with ANY assignment.

If you're sooooo sick of this place- leave.

[OrangeSlushie, RN]

Stop using 'teamwork' as code for 'please do all the annoying parts of my job while I do the easy stuff.'

Don't let me hear in report that somebody's abdomen is distended when in reality they look like they're about to give birth. Maybe somebody should have called the doctor two days ago?!?! At least three different nurses were perfectly ok with that. REALLY?!?

Just because I chose not to procreate & you did, does not mean that I am obligated to pick up all your holidays. Especially the ones that aren't paid holidays.

Stop acting like I'm the worst person in the world because I didn't have time to do all of your 12 point to-do list you so kindly left for me. Maybe if I didn't see you gossiping, looking at ads, and going out to smoke 2-3x during the first hour of your shift, it might motivate me to get all of your stuff done for you.

[flashpoint]

No, I was not "bashing" you "and all single moms" when I told you that I hope my daughters wait until they are married to have children Yes, I was a little offended when you suggested that I will be the next nurse to have a pregnant daughter My daughters are still in high school and college. I do not think I am wrong to hope they are in a committed relationship and somewhat financially stable before they have children.

Yes, I had sex before marriage. Yes, I had sex with a man I was not married to after I was married. Those are two of my biggest regrets in my life Yes, I regret trusting you with anything!

BTW...if I had just been talked to about not sleeping at work, I would make a point of staying awake. The DON talked to you about sleeping just a few hours ago. WAKE UP! Get up and do something if you are tired. Most people are much more likely to doze off when they are reading a book than when they are up and walking. And no, I am not going to leave the room so you can rest better...and yes, I will make a point of moving frequently so the motion activated cameras pick up you sleeping. I doubt that anyone is ignorant enough to believe that you can be awake without moving for two or three hours.

[bradons]

Well today I actually said it to the co-workers and don't have a care in the world about it.

I'm blunt, to the point and put pts first and speak my mind fully. No point in sugar coating the obvious.

[Elvish, BSN, DNP, RN, NP]

"There is a list of people in this world whose opinions of me matter to me.....and you ain't on it."

[Guest757854]

I have so many expletives in what i would like to say to two co workers that all nurses would definitely permanently ban me from this site if I posted it.

[Mandychelle79, ASN, RN]

When I pass on in report to please ask the doctor to look at something ( nothing worthy of calling the doctor at 3 am for, but something that would benefit the patient) please actually do it. Why in the heck am I writing it in 3 places, telling you verbally and it still not being done. Oh and btw I refuse to spoon feed you everything, you have a brain somewhere between your ears, please use it.

[Nurse SMS, MSN, RN]

Changed my mind about posting it :)

[whichone'spink, BSN, RN]

-Uh, if you hear someone playing that old country song "Take this job and shove it" loudly while they are tearing out of the parking ramp, that would be me :). Or "Moving out" by Billy Joel, I haven't decided what I'll play yet.

-Take those donuts and shove them up your ass until they come out of your mouth. I don't want donuts, I just want you to come to work on time. You live an hour away from here, then leave your house at 0530 instead of 0630 FFS. And then don't b**** at me for things that I didn't do that you can easily do. I know you have been a nurse for a long time and you know more than me, but I will NOT listen to you because I do not respect you. I respect other nurses in your peer group, but not you.

[DedHedRN]

I don't trust you anymore. Not at all.

[riverwoman74]

Please don't tell me I HAVE to stay and help you finish YOUR work when you took a smoke break every 30 minutes, each for 10 minutes, PLUS a 60 minute lunch. I didn't take a break ALL day, or a lunch, so I could get MY work done and go home on time!

[A&Ox6, MSN, RN]

Please don't tell me I HAVE to stay and help you finish YOUR work when you took a smoke break every 30 minutes each for 10 minutes, PLUS a 60 minute lunch. I didn't take a break ALL day, or a lunch, so I could get MY work done and go home on time![/quote']

I think that I'm going to start "smoking" candy cigarettes.

[Cuddleswithpuddles]

Hurrrrrrrrryyy up and get report from me. I need to go home and poop in peace. Pleeeeeease.

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