Thankless at times, downright mean others!

Specialties Geriatric

Published

I have this one patient that complains about EVERYTHING...well it must have been a slow day yesterday...so he turned to me!:(

I just got my hair cut, it is short and spikey and I put some highlights in. I went into his room and he went from hello straight on to how much he hated my hair! He told me it looked 'punk' it looked 'unkept' and it didn't look feminine in any way...that I should ask my husband for a appointment for a perm! :eek: (my avatar is me btw...that is how my hair is).:cool:

I must have looked at him like he was an exhibit from the dark ages in the museum! LOL! I just nodded, smiled and went on to my work. But this guy wouldn't let up! HOW rude is that??????:nono:

Finally he said "now if something was wrong with me, I would want you to tell me...is there something wrong with me that you don't like?"

:lol2: OH WHERE TO BEGIN???:lol2: LOL!

But I simply said "you know something..I am a professional nurse, I see things in all people that can be improved, and things I like, and things I really don't like. But you know, I am not your friend, I am not your buddy...I am your nurse, you are a work subject only to me frankly. I don't tell my work subjects my personal opinion unless it is related to medical, and then it isn't my personal opinion per say as much as my clinical opinion. I don't go into peoples room because I want to...heck it is 0630 in the morning I would rather be in bed, but I come in because it is my job!"

Then I smiled :) "Now, if you want to go personal this hairdo matches my personality outside of work, which I do have a life outside of work contrary to popular belief. You are taking to a nurse by day...a tattoo'd, 6 hole earring wearing, smoking, belly peirced gal who plans on getting a nose ring and more tattoos in the future:smokin: , but you wouldn't know that because I don't show that in my professional life at all..out goes the earrings and the tattoo is fully covered simply by placement of clothes:specs: ! My husband loves it:kiss , and would rather me look like a fun loving gal than a permed up priss with her hair just so every day...and I don't ask his permission to get a hair cut, or piercings, or tattoos, or clothes (actually I do...LOL!) because I am an adult. As far as your comment about my hair...frankly mr. __ I don't take it to heart or would waste time being upset on your opinion of me unless it was professional...do you have any probelms with my nursing skills?:nurse: "

He was shocked and said "well...ummmmm no".:chair:

And I cut him off, "Good, now onto your CBG..and another little tid bit of advice about nurses in general, not a good idea to tell one something to upset them when they have to poke you afterwards?!?!? Maybe a good idea to wait till after the pokes with some nurses...not me because as I said I really don't take your comments to heart and would be upset in anyway, but I know a few that may not make it pleasant!";) . And had a huge smile on that couldn't be told if it was an evil smile or a I am being friendly smile (ohhhhhhh that smile is powerful! LOL).:devil:

I won that little convo obviously..but OMG what gall!!!!!! Hi nurse I hate your hair you look like crap! UHGGGGGG. They say nursing is a thankless job..yes at times, but at times it can be down right mean!:rolleyes::(

What kinds of rude comments about your personal life or choice in hairstyles/clothing and what not have you experienced? This is actually my first, and no...I am not mad, a little shocked that he said it, but not made (infact I busted up laughing hard when I left like "OMG I can't believe he said that..heck I can't believe I said what I did..LOL!".:roll )

Specializes in ER.

Even though I am a professional, and try to treat everyone with respect...rude people do not deserve a civil response to their rudeness. It is one thing to be groped by a little old man while turning him, but to be insulted by someone who is lucid but just rude, does not deserve a civil response. In all honesty, in all my years of ER nursing, other than beligerent drunks and druggies, over doses or general low lifes, I can't recall being personally insulted. Maybe I am just deaf, dumb and blind. I am nice to everyone, but don't take any crap off anyone either. If someone gives me a hard time or wants to refuse a treatment, a "shot" a blood draw, I don't argue with them and sure don't beg. They came to ME for care, I did not seek them out. I have plenty of people who want my help, and I don't have time to fool with those who don't. If the patient is in custody, then they can be restrained and forced to have treatment, other than that, I just walk out of the room and make a note of the refusal, notify the doc, and that is usually the end of it. 99% of the time, the patient will comply at that point. If not, I offer an AMA form, and don't look back.

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Specializes in Home care, assisted living.

Boy, do we have people like this!!! One of our residents saw me taking a blood pressure on another male resident and said, "You ought to start kissing the men and see if it makes their blood pressure go up!" Oh boy. :uhoh21: :imbar I get nervous when I have to take HIS blood pressure--wonder why??? He's a big flirt, very opinionated and very mouthy, too. One morning I was knocking on doors to wake people up and he overheard me, so he put on his best girly "falsetto" voice and called out from his room "I don't want to get up". Makes me wonder if he was the class clown back in school. :rolleyes:

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Would have been nice to be able to say "at least I don't look as old as you do".

:rotfl: Good One! :rotfl:

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Specializes in LPN.

I think the best response it to call them on their ugly words.

I feel if someone is so insenative or crass to insult me, I don't need permission to return it in kind. So, I say, that way a rude thing to say, I didn;t like it. Don't do it again. Then stand back and stare them straight in the face without moving a muscle.

You usually have to use small words and short sentence for such small minds.

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Specializes in Education, Acute, Med/Surg, Tele, etc.
I am a paramedic...a LARGE paramedic...5'10" and 250lbs.(but in my defense...I can bench a little over 350 lbs) I had a drunk call me a "fat S.O.B." I simply looked at him (while starting a 14 gauge:rolleyes: ) and stated "you say that like it is a bad thing." (I HATE dealing with drunks...Especially if they are the ones who caused the accident)

My hubby is also a LARGE paramedic...6'2" 280, and I don't know what he can bench...but I will ask about his largest patient on a gurney...LOL! Like he says..he is ALS Always Lifting Something!

He gets nasty mean patients all the time, par for the course I suppose..not really seeing people at their finest..LOL! I hear stories all the time about drunks and druggies and I don't envy that part for sure. Hubby says thank goodness a few times they had those seatbelts on the patient tightly or he may have gotten hit a few times with some of the nastier folks! But it is so diagnostic...if you going to try to hit a huge man in the back of an ambulance you are just NUTS! LOL!!!!

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NOW seirously..that all said and done...what other things did patients say about you that really had you seeing red!

I work in a group home with developmentally disabled women... one woman there is verbally abusive, so I have a lot of replies that head her off at the pass...

like she'll say "you SMELL!!" and I'll reply, "like roses? oh thank you!"

so now she's starting to say it out of the blue, but she says it *so* gruff and hatefully it has a hilarious effect- "you SMELL! like ROSES!!!" :rotfl:

she also swears like a sailor, but it's funny how sweet-talking her or doing something special for her will snap her right out of it.

I'm not sure how I would handle someone who knows better speaking to me like that. :rolleyes: It's gotta be tough.

Bethany

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Specializes in Home care, assisted living.

Let's see, I could think of some more residents.

There's the tall, skinny man I was asked to help out of bed when I was a young 17-year-old CNA. Without makeup on I looked like I was 12. And I'm only five feet tall. So this guy takes one look at me and tells my trainer, "I don't want that little girl taking care of me. She'll BREAK me!!"

Then there's the racist lady who hated blacks. If black CNAs were taking care of her, she asked for God to come strike them down and save her from them. One of these CNAs had had enough and told her she'd better stop that--God might let something awful happen to her. (Shortly thereafter, this woman had a stroke and had to leave our facility, and the CNA was afraid she had jinxed her.)

When I was new at my current job we had another racist resident who told a CNA (my supervisor) that she was a "black b---- with a big ol' butt". The CNA informed her that she's Latino, not black. The resident then went on to say that Hispanics and black people worship a different Jesus than white people. Sheesh, gotta love living in the South! :uhoh3:

We currently have a lady who complains about EVERYTHING. She told me point-blank that the kitchen director was better as a caregiver than as a cook (I decided NOT to pass on the comment).

That's all I can think of for now. Who knows, maybe I'll use these folks for inspiration in a novel someday. :rotfl:

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I work in LTC. I had one resident tell me that my boobs were to small for my husband to even grab!!!:imbar I just turned red as a beet and told her "my husband likes them just fine and we'll leave it at that" and left the room.

Another time when I was pregnant a resident got mad and told me she hoped my baby was born with convulsions!!!!! She was so mean. I just had to walk out of the room and get someone else to go in there the rest of the day.

Last but not least, I have one resident and she tells me almost everyday how ugly she thinks I am. It bothered me at first but now I just smile really big and say "thanks so much! I love you, have a great day"

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My first clinical I was called a "boy nurse". :chuckle

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Specializes in ER.

"you say that like it is a bad thing."

Wicked good! I will have to remember that one and use it.

And I would like to personally come out and thank all those who felt it necessary to comment on the appropriateness of telling the pt he was out of line. Probably it was the most therapeutic thing to happen to him all day. (and take that pine tree out of your butt, haven't you heard about something called support?)

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I am so glad that everyone can verbalize their OPINIONS here on this site!!!!! It is wonderful and therapeutic to everyone involved.

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"you say that like it is a bad thing."

Who?

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