Thankless at times, downright mean others!

[Antikigirl]

I have this one patient that complains about EVERYTHING...well it must have been a slow day yesterday...so he turned to me!

I just got my hair cut, it is short and spikey and I put some highlights in. I went into his room and he went from hello straight on to how much he hated my hair! He told me it looked 'punk' it looked 'unkept' and it didn't look feminine in any way...that I should ask my husband for a appointment for a perm! (my avatar is me btw...that is how my hair is).

I must have looked at him like he was an exhibit from the dark ages in the museum! LOL! I just nodded, smiled and went on to my work. But this guy wouldn't let up! HOW rude is that??????

Finally he said "now if something was wrong with me, I would want you to tell me...is there something wrong with me that you don't like?"

OH WHERE TO BEGIN??? LOL!

But I simply said "you know something..I am a professional nurse, I see things in all people that can be improved, and things I like, and things I really don't like. But you know, I am not your friend, I am not your buddy...I am your nurse, you are a work subject only to me frankly. I don't tell my work subjects my personal opinion unless it is related to medical, and then it isn't my personal opinion per say as much as my clinical opinion. I don't go into peoples room because I want to...heck it is 0630 in the morning I would rather be in bed, but I come in because it is my job!"

Then I smiled :) "Now, if you want to go personal this hairdo matches my personality outside of work, which I do have a life outside of work contrary to popular belief. You are taking to a nurse by day...a tattoo'd, 6 hole earring wearing, smoking, belly peirced gal who plans on getting a nose ring and more tattoos in the future:smokin: , but you wouldn't know that because I don't show that in my professional life at all..out goes the earrings and the tattoo is fully covered simply by placement of clothes:specs: ! My husband loves it:kiss , and would rather me look like a fun loving gal than a permed up priss with her hair just so every day...and I don't ask his permission to get a hair cut, or piercings, or tattoos, or clothes (actually I do...LOL!) because I am an adult. As far as your comment about my hair...frankly mr. __ I don't take it to heart or would waste time being upset on your opinion of me unless it was professional...do you have any probelms with my nursing skills? "

He was shocked and said "well...ummmmm no".:chair:

And I cut him off, "Good, now onto your CBG..and another little tid bit of advice about nurses in general, not a good idea to tell one something to upset them when they have to poke you afterwards?!?!? Maybe a good idea to wait till after the pokes with some nurses...not me because as I said I really don't take your comments to heart and would be upset in anyway, but I know a few that may not make it pleasant!";) . And had a huge smile on that couldn't be told if it was an evil smile or a I am being friendly smile (ohhhhhhh that smile is powerful! LOL).

I won that little convo obviously..but OMG what gall!!!!!! Hi nurse I hate your hair you look like crap! UHGGGGGG. They say nursing is a thankless job..yes at times, but at times it can be down right mean!

What kinds of rude comments about your personal life or choice in hairstyles/clothing and what not have you experienced? This is actually my first, and no...I am not mad, a little shocked that he said it, but not made (infact I busted up laughing hard when I left like "OMG I can't believe he said that..heck I can't believe I said what I did..LOL!".:roll )

[Antikigirl, ASN, RN]

What a shame that you can't write a note for a doctor to recommend psych evals for some of these people, though .

LOL! Funny thing is..I DID! LOL! He wasn't adjusting well when he moved in and even though he was a ....ummm...well...turkey...I felt badly for him and used all the nursing excuses for his behaviors like childhood, power role, etc. And he has had 4 doctors over 6 months because docs don't want to deal with him! Then I felt even worse since I am his only medic that would give him the time or day...even though he was calling me his 'laundry maid'.

So he kinda crossed a line by going from professional to personal....

He has been denied 4 times for psych eval...maybe when he ticks this doc off...I can get to the new doc before hand and get one! LOL!

[Antikigirl, ASN, RN]

I agree with graduate nurse.......your comments about the needle didn't sound very professional to me...........and really could have been taken as threatning. As far as telling him how your felt..............didn't sound very professional to me. I have worked in LTC facilities and hospitals and have never felt the need to talk to a patient that way. Have you ever thought something is bothering them when they act out that way? Being a professional means taking the higher road. Perhaps investigating why the patient is always so mean. There is a number of things that could be bothering him.

I agree I don't like to be put down, but I have always managed to smile and walk away from the situation without stooping to the patient's level.

Utterly totally noted and appreciated...thanks

[Antikigirl, ASN, RN]

I agree with you Sarah.

Also noted and appreciated...thank you!

[webblarsk]

Wasn't trying to be mean, just my opinion. I know this is a place to vent and I totally don't want you to feel like you can't come to vent. LTC is a hard job and leaves you feeling very unappreciated. I know from first hand experience. I worked in one for 6 years. 2 as CNA and 4 as LPN.

[Antikigirl, ASN, RN]

OH no Sarah...no, I appreciate your comments and thought of them too myself :). I am generally a very tame and to the point nurse..heck this is the first time I have mildly (in my oppinion..I use to work ED!) told a patient comments are noted but NOT appreciated!

Actually...I was trained by paramedics..and I use humor in a morbid sence at times to get a bit of the old mystery behind what I am saying..makes them think (dependant on client). I was right on, and we laughed about it (which I really actually knew would happen, but didn't say I didn't sweat a bit..LOL!).

No no..you are totally right, and folks shouldn't do that most of the time...I just know my clients very well and was a down to earth people person before I was a nurse (kinda a Oregonian spirit...LOL, our phrase of the state is "we are different here" they are right..LOL!).

Hey...it worked..will I do it again..proably not..but it worked so I am sitting pretty..or spikey..or whatever! LOL!

No feel free to express yourself :)...I find folks sometimes don't on here, and feel that people WISH to say things and don't because they fear the responces..I took a chance with this one...got what I thought...and your opinion is utterly good with me!!:) (you weren't mean!)

[Antikigirl, ASN, RN]

wow..and I am use to a smaller forum can you tell..I actually respond when I have time...LOL!!!!!!!!!!

NOW seirously..that all said and done...what other things did patients say about you that really had you seeing red!

Some of these on here I have read would have me in "okay now breathe deep..two three four...no now breath..don't speak....two three four..." LOL!!!!!!!!!!

Acne? Hair? Weight? what are we...going for nurse super model??? Call in Tyra Banks...lets get this going on!!!!!! LOL!!!!!!!

[Maggie in NC]

I had a patient grab my boob once. I don't mean touch quickly, I MEAN GRAB AND HOLD. I was so shocked I almost punched him before I thought. I looked at him and said, "HEY, what do you think you are doing?" He raised his eyebrows like he was making a suggestion of sex or something. I was so humilated. I said, "Mr. blah blah blah, that was totally inappropriate." I refused him as a patient. THAT WAS WAY OVER THE LINE. I am professional but I refuse to have anyone touch me inappropriately. My supervisor thought I was "over reacting" Until he did it to her too. Yeah, THEN he got only male nurses. I get mad just thinkin about this!

[Cubby]

Due to having the worlds worst hair-I keep my hair cut very short. One day a resident asked me what my name was and I replied "My name is Cindy." (Nope not my real name), he turned to me and replied "Cindy-thats a pretty strange name for a guy." Good thing I have a sense of humor about my self. I have told this story several times, and it still makes me laugh. :rotfl:

[webblarsk]

I had a patient grab my boob once. I don't mean touch quickly, I MEAN GRAB AND HOLD. I was so shocked I almost punched him before I thought. I looked at him and said, "HEY, what do you think you are doing?" He raised his eyebrows like he was making a suggestion of sex or something. I was so humilated. I said, "Mr. blah blah blah, that was totally inappropriate." I refused him as a patient. THAT WAS WAY OVER THE LINE. I am professional but I refuse to have anyone touch me inappropriately. My supervisor thought I was "over reacting" Until he did it to her too. Yeah, THEN he got only male nurses. I get mad just thinkin about this!

I agree, grabbing your boob is way over the line.

[emsboss]

I am a paramedic...a LARGE paramedic...5'10" and 250lbs.(but in my defense...I can bench a little over 350 lbs) I had a drunk call me a "fat S.O.B." I simply looked at him (while starting a 14 gauge:rolleyes: ) and stated "you say that like it is a bad thing." (I HATE dealing with drunks...Especially if they are the ones who caused the accident)

[webblarsk]

I am a paramedic...a LARGE paramedic...5'10" and 250lbs.(but in my defense...I can bench a little over 350 lbs) I had a drunk call me a "fat S.O.B." I simply looked at him (while starting a 14 gauge:rolleyes: ) and stated "you say that like it is a bad thing." (I HATE dealing with drunks...Especially if they are the ones who caused the accident)

LOL:chuckle

[UM Review RN, ASN, RN]

I simply looked at him (while starting a 14 gauge:rolleyes: ) and stated "you say that like it is a bad thing."

BWAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!! :rotfl: Too funny!