Terrible experience with nursing staff

[guest1074638]

I'm going through a really rough time and I'm not sure this is the best place to put this post but I guess I need someone to hear me.

I moved to Brazil in 2019 and, short story, I had an urgent hysterectomy (open abdominal) 2 days ago. The nursing staff at the hospital here were extremely indifferent toward me. I was very frightened before the surgery and was crying, nobody held my hand or told me it would be okay. They only talked to me to tell me to move this way, put my arm here, etc. 1 day postop I tried to ambulate to the bathroom (no one would help me) and fainted, hitting my face on the bathroom floor (currently have a black eye and bruised cheekbone). I woke up and yelled "help, help!" about 10-15 times before anyone came, finally it was my boyfriend who woke up and came to help me. The nurses stood there sucking their teeth and saying they can't believe I did this as he helped me back to bed. No one examined me afterwards, looked at my face, or even asked if I had symptoms.

The doctor came shortly after that and said I could go home, and you could believe I got out of there as fast as I could. The doctor only sent me home with ketoprofen. For an open abdominal surgery. I am currently using old prescriptions of zofran and hydrocodone I brought with me from the states.

My feelings are so hurt at being treated like this. I would never in my life let a patient fall. I would never let a patient sit in bed and cry. I have always made sure to tell my patients to call me if they feel anxious, upset, or need to talk. I hold my patients' hands and say I am here for you.

I feel like these nurses hated me. My boyfriend, who is Brazilian, says this is normal here. He says it is his fault for letting me fall because the family is supposed to do all the patient care, the nurses are just there to give medication. I am beyond offended at this idea, that nurses are just pill pushers. I am having a lot of second thoughts about living in a place where anyone would act like this, to me it's just common decency.

I was discharged to home yesterday and honestly terrified of having complications and having to go back to the hospital. I also feel like I need to find out what the governing body is for hospitals here and file a complaint against these people.

[caliotter3]

21 minutes ago, Wuzzie said:

So sue them because they have a different culture and a different medical culture? Maybe she should sue her boyfriend for disregarding her calls for help when he knew it was expected of him to care for her. Maybe we should send people there to teach them the American way of doing things.?

Sorry KK. I'm really not trying to be contentious but her obvious disdain for the people in the country she chose to move to really rubs me the wrong way. I would have been more sympathetic if she approached this from an "I was terrified to have major surgery in a foreign country because it's very different" and not described the natives as "these people" who "stood around sucking their teeth" perhaps she would have garnered more sympathy from the members. Of course I'm sorry it happened but I have to think that the attitude she has displayed here was likely displayed there and may have played a role in the events that occurred. Not to mention her cultural ignorance. Now she wants to turn them in to a "governing body"?

Wuzzie you articulated what turned me off about OP’s apparent approach.

[JadedCPN, BSN, RN]

The entire original post just reeks of US entitlement.

[volfar]

19 hours ago, TriciaJ said:

Not only that, but I've had patients call me to perform little tasks while perfectly able family members stand by. I've had family members bring a water bottle to the nurses' station for me to fill, but not wait while I fill it and expect me to follow them with it back to the room. One day a patient can ambulate the entire length of the hall. I come back the next day, no change in condition but the commode is back in the room, sitting about 3 feet away from the actual toilet.

And people think they want single payer health care? They have no idea.

Could you help me see the connection between seemingly selfish, entitled patients and single-payer health care?

[Daisy4RN]

39 minutes ago, volfar said:

Could you help me see the connection between seemingly selfish, entitled patients and single-payer health care?

Well, for one thing pts wont get all the fluff stuff they are getting now.

[Just me.]

I sympathize with your feelings. Having any surgery is scary and must have been a very emotional experience, no family around, etc.

And having an unexpected hysterectomy, especially for someone of child bearing years, or not, can be devastating. This would be compounded if one planned on having children in the future. EDIT: I understand it didn't state complete hysterectomy...*

I don't know anything about the nursing culture in Brazil. But to me it sounds like you wanted/needed some bedside compassion and it just wasn't happening. EDIT: I really appreciated the post from the nurse who actually lived in a foreign country and experienced things first hand after having a baby. And what she said made sense about the healthcare and cultural differences.

I remember having post-partum depression almost immediately after having a cesarean. I distinctly remember a nurse telling me that she didn't have time to help me. I called once for medicine, they were busy. I remember crying and crying. Years later I remember all the details.

As far as legal action or a formal complaint, I simply don't know.

Just continue to be the type of nurse you wanted those days you spent in the hospital.

[volfar]

On 2/19/2020 at 1:16 PM, Daisy4RN said:

Well, for one thing pts won't get all the fluff stuff they are getting now.

How so?

[Hoosier_RN, MSN]

50 minutes ago, Daisy4RN said:

Well, for one thing pts wont get all the fluff stuff they are getting now.

True story. As witnessed in Europe, Canada, and the public health system in Australia. There are no frills and no extras. And if it's not life vs death emergency, you are not a priority.

[Hoosier_RN, MSN]

On 2/19/2020 at 2:00 PM, volfar said:

How so?

The staffing ratios are worse compared to US. Read answers by various non-US posters on this site. They don't make near as much either. Many try to come to US for better pay and treatment, and it's not because it's so wonderful where they are coming from. All of my children were born overseas, one in a German hospital. While the nurses and facility were hospitable enough, it was nowhere near what we take for granted in the US

[TriciaJ, RN]

3 hours ago, volfar said:

Could you help me see the connection between seemingly selfish, entitled patients and single-payer health care?

Yes. Single payer healthcare will not pay for all the extra niceties the American health consumer is used to. It will be a very rude awakening for some people.

Here's my real life experience: my domestic partner has had many surgeries in the US, in different hospitals. The family waiting rooms were all nice, freshly painted with new-appearing furniture and natural light. He always had a private room and television was included. Despite tight ratios, his nurses always responded promptly and the ancillary staff were attentive too.

My dad in Canada suffered severe burns in a farming accident. He did get a private room only because he was on isolation. The TV had to be paid for separately for him to watch it. The nurses were attentive (and always willing to update me on the phone) but were of course busy. When my dad asked the diet aide to open containers for him because of his burned hands, he was told "Ask them."

When he became septic, I rushed home and stayed with my mom in the ICU waiting room. It was dismal. It was on the 2nd floor and looked like a basement because there were no windows. The furniture was beat up. Old, institutional linoleum. The staff were kind and updated us frequently.

I don't doubt my dad received great care. But his overall hospital experience was very different from my boyfriend's.

My brother waited a year for shoulder surgery. My other brother, who also has shoulder problems, was not even put on the waiting list. He was told "It's not bad enough yet."

The care in Canada is good if you have an emergency. It's also good for non-emergencies, when your name comes up on the list. I don't believe anyone in my family has been asked to complete a Press-Ganey survey.

[DTWriter]

The responsibility of the patient's ADLs falling on the patient's family...what a dream that would be in the U.S.

In the OP's case, I wonder if there was a language barrier.

Without words, a person's behavior could be mistaken for something else. For example - crying without tears could be mistaken for laughing.

And, saying words in another language could be mistaken for something else. For example - the name "Kira" means "bright" in Italy, "dark" in Ireland, and "killer" in Japan.

[Pepper The Cat, BSN, RN]

2 hours ago, TriciaJ said:

Yes. Single payer healthcare will not pay for all the extra niceties the American health consumer is used to. It will be a very rude awakening for some people.

Here's my real life experience: my domestic partner has had many surgeries in the US, in different hospitals. The family waiting rooms were all nice, freshly painted with new-appearing furniture and natural light. He always had a private room and television was included. Despite tight ratios, his nurses always responded promptly and the ancillary staff were attentive too.

My dad in Canada suffered severe burns in a farming accident. He did get a private room only because he was on isolation. The TV had to be paid for separately for him to watch it. The nurses were attentive (and always willing to update me on the phone) but were of course busy. When my dad asked the diet aide to open containers for him because of his burned hands, he was told "Ask them."

When he became septic, I rushed home and stayed with my mom in the ICU waiting room. It was dismal. It was on the 2nd floor and looked like a basement because there were no windows. The furniture was beat up. Old, institutional linoleum. The staff were kind and updated us frequently.

I don't doubt my dad received great care. But his overall hospital experience was very different from my boyfriend's.

My brother waited a year for shoulder surgery. My other brother, who also has shoulder problems, was not even put on the waiting list. He was told "It's not bad enough yet."

The care in Canada is good if you have an emergency. It's also good for non-emergencies, when your name comes up on the list. I don't believe anyone in my family has been asked to complete a Press-Ganey survey.

So he had to pay for his TV. Big deal. How much did he pay for the rest of his care?? And I would rather the hospital spend its money on staff and supplies than making a waiting room pretty. Pretty waiting rooms are nice, don’t get me wrong, but not high on the priority list.

[HandsOffMySteth]

31 minutes ago, Pepper The Cat said:

So he had to pay for his TV. Big deal. How much did he pay for the rest of his care?? And I would rather the hospital spend its money on staff and supplies than making a waiting room pretty. Pretty waiting rooms are nice, don’t get me wrong, but not high on the priority list.

I'm sure it also extends to the level of care. I have heard some bad stories about the UK and how you are treated poorly, have to wait much longer, and may be turned away. I think that is what she was talking about.