Stupid hospital/company tricks

Nurses General Nursing

Published

The stupid nurse trick thread and some of the abusive policies cited in the getting fired for being late/calling out thread have triggered me to start this thread. What ludicrous policies have been put in place where you work or have worked, what was the rationale for the policy, and what was the result?

My example:

One hospital I used to work for tried to force the nursing staff to bake cookies for the patients using what looked like a cross between an easy-bake oven and a toaster oven. Cookies were to be offered at....you've guessed it...7pm. Yes, right at change of shift. They also wanted us to DOCUMENT offering cookies. Predictably, this new mandate was met with howls of protest from nursing, which were entirely ignored.

The ovens went to each floor except ICU to "make the hospital feel welcoming and increase patient satisfaction." The already busy nurses often burned the cookies, or ate them during report, as they had not had time for a break all day. The majority of our cardiac patients were also diabetic. The floor smelled often of burnt cookies. The staff was resentful. A few months later, the cookie ovens disappeared, never to be mentioned again.

Specializes in Inpatient Oncology/Public Health.
We still have the hourly rounding sheets; thank heavens the tech do them. One tech signed them all early and the family took a picture and emailed it to the department head. Sigh. USELESS!

They got rid of our hourly rounding sheets and outfitted us with tracking devices instead.

A minor one that died a quiet death: Our hospital also had a contest on who can reduce their linen use the most but offered no guidelines or even a foggy idea if we are wasting linen. As far as I could see, we were not being ballers and throwing linen on the floor like so many bottles of Cristal. My coworkers and I had fun coming up with tips though- - Don't bathe your patient. Let them be au naturale. - Use printer paper instead of washcloths. - Have patients share blankets. Now they've made a new friend too. What was the prize in the end? Yet another pizza party lol[/quote']

Hilarious! Wish I worked with your group...seems like you all have a great sense of humor!

Specializes in Hospital Education Coordinator.

cookies: What would the Health dept say about that? Infection control? Yuk

As for hourly rounding, it is now a nursing standard. Nurses or CNA's document electronically, which keeps perfect time!

Specializes in L&D.

I cannot stop laughing about the cookie thing!! That is wild!

Specializes in ER.

I'll never forget the small community hospital where I previously worked. The infection control nurse initiated a program that measured hand sanitizer in each dispensing machine throughout the hospital. This was to monitor our usage, and also start a 'morale building' competition between departments, with some patronizing, lame reward for the most usage. It was pathetic, we'd be working our butts off, and she'd come around doing her measuring rounds.

When things got slow we'd pump a bunch of it out to skew the numbers in our unit. I'll tell you, administration at that hospital didn't have enough to do, so they come up with this dumb stuff to justify their existence.

Specializes in OB.

Here's one that occurred at one facility at which I was contracted. It happened because of the inadvertent intersection of two policies:

Policy 1 - Any employee involved in an incident requiring a report must take a urine drug screen.

Policy 2 - Any "nurse delivery" (no physician present) in OB required an incident report to be filed.

You see where this is going....For catching the baby I was required to submit to a drug screen! I tried to argue that the Doc should be the one to take it - he was the one that was slow!

Specializes in MDS/ UR.
A minor one that died a quiet death:

Our hospital also had a contest on who can reduce their linen use the most, but offered no guidelines or even a foggy idea if we are wasting linen. As far as I could see, we were not being ballers and throwing linen on the floor like so many bottles of Cristal. My coworkers and I had fun coming up with tips though-

- Don't bathe your patient. Let them be au naturale.

- Use printer paper instead of washcloths.

- Have patients share blankets. Now they've made a new friend too.

What was the prize in the end? Yet another pizza party lol

Share blanket and make a new friend too! Love it!

Specializes in ED; Med Surg.
They got rid of our hourly rounding sheets and outfitted us with tracking devices instead.

Oh, we have those too. They really want to make sure we are in those rooms.

Specializes in MDS/ UR.
Here's one that occurred at one facility at which I was contracted. It happened because of the inadvertent intersection of two policies:

Policy 1 - Any employee involved in an incident requiring a report must take a urine drug screen.

Policy 2 - Any "nurse delivery" (no physician present) in OB required an incident report to be filed.

You see where this is going....For catching the baby I was required to submit to a drug screen! I tried to argue that the Doc should be the one to take it - he was the one that was slow!

My place too.

Specializes in ER, ICU, Education.
This whole entire post just makes me want to bang my head off a desk. Who the heck would EVER think that is a good idea?!?! We have had volunteers go around with a refreshment cart with snacks before. But it doesn't happen often. To ask the front line staff to bake cookies as part of their mandatory care at a hospital seems absolutely ridiculous to me. Clearly the ones thinking this up have never actually worked bedside.

Well, to be fair, we did at times bake them. We just either burnt them or ate them. :laugh:

Specializes in L&D, infusion, urology.

OP- I can't imagine the cookies! And what about any patients that are NPO or advancing their diets (or as previously mentioned, the diabetic pts)?? I'd be SO ****** if I was offered broth when the whole unit smells of cookies.

I remember those stupid hourly rounding sheets outside the doors. The manager would go through them when the policy was first implemented. The nurses would sign all twelve spaces at the end of shift.

Then the managers probably got burnt out on checking up and the whole stupid idea (thankfully) died out.

Yeah, we still have these, too. Luckily on the unit where I am now, they've "gone missing".

Filing, organizing storage areas, cleaning -- I don't mind, at least it's somewhat tied to patient care, in that I need to know where all those things are and/or have to use them frequently.

But painting, repairing furniture, dealing with plumbing (beyond a simple plunger in the toilet) -- to me, that is work that should be done by the professionals, because I don't want to be responsible for it. I have accepted responsibility for the patients under my care, I don't want to be responsible for someone who walks into wet paint and gets mad or has their chair fall apart because I didn't put the screws in right.

(In writing this post, I've tried to define to myself why I view those as two separate areas, and I find I'm still struggling a bit. I guess part of it is also the expectation going in to the job: I have had jobs where I build, paint, etc. But when I'm hired for nursing, I want to be doing nursing, y'know? And I don't want my patients to see me on a ladder out front beforehand.)

How on earth are you expected to be available to provide pt care if you're also doing this stuff? Even if you're being tasked with this in lieu of pt care, I would imagine it being less expensive to pay someone in maintenance than to pay a nurse, and someone in maintenance may have actually received some kind of training in this area!

Well, to be fair, we did at times bake them. We just either burnt them or ate them. :laugh:

Knowing my coworkers and I, there would be attempts to make a MEGACOOKIE or cookies in... interesting... shapes.

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