S.C. 5th Grader Dies After a Fight at School

Published

https://abcnews.go.com/US/south-carolina-mom-complained-bullying-deadly-5th-grade/story?id=62242830

Ya'll, I can't even begin to imagine the pain the parents are dealing with. My heart hurts for the teacher, admin, and, of course, the school nurse. Four of five years of my school nursing career have been spent at the elementary school level and I've never seen a fight where a child was injured beyond a scratch or a bruise. I guess no one is immune.

Specializes in School Nursing.

I used to work in Emotional Support where fighting was the norm and staff really did a great job with management and prevention because they were all specially trained in this type of behavioral setting.

I would cry more in that then when I worked with kids who were medically fragile and may not make it into their teens due to their diagnosis. At least with them you know there is a short life expectancy so there's some mental preparation. With the ES kids (elementary/middle school), they'd go after strangers who they thought looked at them funny in the hallways. I'd go home and imaging them doing that in a few years on the street and end up going after the wrong person who unknowingly has a knife/gun and end up dead or critical.

It breaks my heart that kids this young can rev up to this violent level, and that in some schools people don't recognize the storm as it is brewing.

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This may be controversial but schools should actually encourage children to fight back.

It seems to be the norm for school officials to not act unless the 2nd person (the victim) fights back; at that point, both the bully and the 2nd person would get in trouble.

I firmly believe that the 2nd person (the victim) should have the right to hit back, and not get punished along with the bully, even if the bully were to sustained permanent damage. That way, wanna-be bullies would be discouraged from starting a fight, and would-be victims would not hesitate to defend themselves.

Furthermore, school officials and the bullies' parents should be fined for failing to protect the victims. With a big enough fine, I doubt school officials will continue to ignore reports of bullying.

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Specializes in ICU/community health/school nursing.
4 minutes ago, DTWriter said:

This may be controversial but schools should actually encourage children to fight back.

It seems to be the norm for school officials to not act unless the 2nd person (the victim) fights back; at that point, both the bully and the 2nd person would get in trouble.

I firmly believe that the 2nd person (the victim) should have the right to hit back, and not get punished along with the bully, even if the bully were to sustained permanent damage. That way, wanna-be bullies would be discouraged from starting a fight, and would-be victims would not hesitate to defend themselves.

Furthermore, school officials and the bullies' parents should be fined for failing to protect the victims. With a big enough fine, I doubt school officials will continue to ignore reports of bullying.

Then it becomes mutual combat and both students are prosecuted.

Not saying that's right. Just saying how it is.

However, that did not stop me from telling my kid that if anyone grabbed her she could swing her 40-pound backpack at 'em.

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Some of these 5th graders are huge and about the same size as a small adult. It is a shame that these things are happening. I know that teachers can only do so much. I feel that their needs to be stricter policies on bullying and fighting in school. If kids want to fight they, don't belong in school. It is a shame when a child isn't safe at school to learn. Then we are shocked when a child brings a gun to school and shoots everyone up.

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18 hours ago, Glitternurse said:

I feel that mother's frustration, if not her pain (I can't even imagine). My 3rd grade daughter is bullied by a group of boys. She has been knocked down and hit (thank God only once). I know the school is doing what they are supposed to, but as a parent I feel like it should be more than a few lost recesses. Fortunately the yard duties keep an eye out and if any of the boys start heading in her direction they redirect them. She talks to me and we have her in counseling. The boys have finally figured out that I'm the nurse and I'm at the school a couple of days a week, so it's getting better. Although I have to say it is difficult to be objective and "professional" when I have to see these kids because I know they are hurting my daughter emotionally, but I remember I am the adult and these kids clearly need a better example.

When my daughter was in school she had a boy bully. He bullied her on the school bus and even in front of my house. I told her to tell him to stop and then one day we both confronted the kid in front of my house. He left her alone after that. I would want to meet with the kids parents if this was going on at school. I would even have all kids involved at the meeting to. Your child is a child and needs adult intervention. When she becomes an adult, than it is will be something different. Girls tend to be more afraid of boys. Since that situation my daughter defends herself and isn't afraid to do so.

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I've always told my grandkids if anyone is ever bullying them to let their old Nanny know and I'll be right up at that school too! Call me old school!

So very sad. What happened to Zero Tolerance?

I just saw this on the news last night.

https://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/437961-colorado-town-funds-anti-bullying-program-with-marijuana-sales

It looks like Colorado is spending a part of their $26 million revenue from annual recreational marijuana sales on programs to prevent bullying in their schools, and bullying is down 23% since then. Way to be smart, Colorado! Thanks for actually doing something smart to protect our babies and young people!

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Specializes in pediatrics, School LVN.
41 minutes ago, Workitinurfava said:

When my daughter was in school she had a boy bully. He bullied her on the school bus and even in front of my house. I told her to tell him to stop and then one day we both confronted the kid in front of my house. He left her alone after that. I would want to meet with the kids parents if this was going on at school. I would even have all kids involved at the meeting to. Your child is a child and needs adult intervention. When she becomes an adult, than it is will be something different. Girls tend to be more afraid of boys. Since that situation my daughter defends herself and isn't afraid to do so.

we have told her she has the right to defend herself, but she doesn't want anyone to get hurt (she is a green belt in karate). She is sensitive and kind and smart, so she's an easy target. Her teacher is recommending her for the GATE program next year so she will be separated from these boys.

As as meeting with the parents, unsurprising, these parents are difficult if not impossible to get ahold of and do not show up to meetings. The boys have figured out I am mom and currently they have lost all recess for a month so they have to sit in the office, right next to the health office. It's uncomfortable for them, they can't even look at me.

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Specializes in School Nursing, Ambulatory Care, etc..

Another article about this incident.

My heart hurts for everybody involved. I can't imagine what the other girl must be thinking or feeling. I can't think of a single decision I made at 10 years old that had life long consequences - this girl, will live with this for the rest of her life.

https://www.wjcl.com/article/mother-south-carolina-5th-grader-who-died-after-fight-hit-head-on-shelf/27084273

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Specializes in School Nursing.
1 hour ago, BunnyBunnyBSNRN said:

Another article about this incident.

My heart hurts for everybody involved. I can't imagine what the other girl must be thinking or feeling. I can't think of a single decision I made at 10 years old that had life long consequences - this girl, will live with this for the rest of her life.

https://www.wjcl.com/article/mother-south-carolina-5th-grader-who-died-after-fight-hit-head-on-shelf/27084273

Such a good point! Oh my heart again.

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What kind of fighting has this child been exposed to at home? Where'd she learn this behavior? Where were the adults?

Where was her teacher if she'd been being bullied all day long?!

Where was the principal???!!! Maybe we need to teach our children to run to to the principal at the first inkling of bullying before some kid rams their head into a bookshelf since their teacher is evidently not paying attention!!!

This is sickening that kids aren't protected from bullies at school. Adults where are you? This had been going on for a good while it sounds like. Was the bully the teachers kid or something??? Were they afraid of her parents? What gives???? They just didn't want to be bothered, what the hell??? I'd be holding the adults accountable for this as much as the bully! ZERO TOLERANCE TO BULLIES EVERYWHERE, ADULTS AND CHILDREN!

So the child just brain hemmorhaged! I'm having a hard time having sympathy for the bully child but I do feel sad that she is a child, but that's about it, and maybe her environment was terrible. I don't know. Just no!

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Yes I've read about this horrible incident. From what I've read, the bully was older and she was held back a few years and she was a troubled child. So sad it took this to happen before anybody did anything.? Well let me just say this, if any bully or anybody meaning my kids any harm, they are taught/trained to defend themselves...IJS.?‍♀️

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IJS if they aren't 'trained' an adult needs to sep in!

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