Reality Check.

Published

Specializes in Critical Care.

Excuse my grammar and spelling as I write this in the midst of a migraine storm. I am an experienced critical care nurse, and recently I’ve had a reality check.

I’ve wanted to be a provider since I was a child. Being a physician was originally my dream, life however lead me down the avenue of nursing. To make a long story short, ever since I was in nursing school I planned on becoming a nurse practitioner once I gained adequate experience, so seven years later here I am in my second semester of graduate school.

This semester has been a reality check, as I dive into the world of physical assessments, proper documentation, differential diagnoses, and proper clinical reasoning. I’m truly stressed and scared. I’ve always been an anxious person to begin with, I think part of it is because I’m afraid of failing, and well I’m terrified of hurting a patient and I realize the responsibility is tremendous. 
 

As if it wasn’t enough, the negative comments about NPs are rather excessive, particularly from Reddit groups and forums like StudentDoctor, where medical students, resident physicians, and even attending physicians rant and complain about “mid-level” scope creeping. They post horror stories of misdiagnosed aneurysm, peritonitis, and ectopic pregnancies. I’ve even seen one Reddit user that devotes his entire account to creating fictional tales of an NP, he portrays the NP in a satirical and sarcastic manner, magnifying their medical mistakes.

The pressure to succeed and do well is real. Firstly for my future patients, for I wish not to hurt anyone under my care. Secondly, I do not wish to appear as a fraud. I do feel like a fraud, like how in the world am I entrusted with this responsibility? Don’t get me wrong, I will never pretend to know something I do not know! 
 

Lastly, maintaining full time employment whilst going to school. I know plenty of nurses that work FT and do NP school. The thing is that I’m extremely concerned with dedicating as much time as possible into my studies. Full time employment with school is stressing me out. I don’t have a family or anyone to support, so quitting is very tempting. The only thing I’m afraid of losing are my benefits. ☹️

Specializes in NICU.
47 minutes ago, VaniCCRN said:

the negative comments about NPs are rather excessive, particularly from Reddit groups and forums like StudentDoctor, where medical students, resident physicians, and even attending physicians rant and complain about “mid-level” scope creeping.

What were you expecting? In Middle school, you have guys in the locker room making up stories about the girls. This Reddit Forum is the same as the Middle school locker room. The only difference is they don't care if the girls hear them. They are threatened by NPs because you are invading on their turf and they don't like it. 

Specializes in CEN.

A few responses I have based on your concerns:

1. I can give plenty of horror stories where an MD made mistakes or missed a diagnosis and the heroic nurses save the day. It goes both ways.

2. Truth be told, being an NP is a major Responsibility. I would be terrified of YOU if you weren't scared of the implications. 

3. Are you doing school full time? If so, maybe do college part time? 

Specializes in Nurse Leader specializing in Labor & Delivery.

Hi OP - that is why I dropped out of midwifery school one year into it (hi Frontier class 80, if anyone is out there!). I realized my anxiety was too great for the responsibility of being a practitioner. So I switched tracks and went into leadership. Lots of responsibilities, but mostly not the life or death kinds. 

There is nothing wrong with having goals since you were very young. If you go along and find that what you thought you wanted isn't what you want now, you are allowed to pivot to something else. 

People grow and change and get to know themselves better. If you would be happier with a lesser burden of responsibility, maybe it is time to re-evaluate your goals and see what you really want.

Remind the guy making fun of midlevels misdiagnosing pts that a physician must agree with and sign off on the midlevel’s assessment and tx, so the MD missed it also!

6 hours ago, VaniCCRN said:

This semester has been a reality check, as I dive into the world of physical assessments, proper documentation, differential diagnoses, and proper clinical reasoning. I’m truly stressed and scared.

 

6 hours ago, VaniCCRN said:

As if it wasn’t enough, the negative comments about NPs are rather excessive, particularly from Reddit groups and forums like StudentDoctor, where medical students, resident physicians, and even attending physicians rant and complain about “mid-level” scope creeping.

You probably aren't stressed and scared because of SDN or Reddit. Maybe....just maybe....what's a little freakish is the set-up of graduate nursing education for something as serious as the provider role. People love to get defensive about it but it doesn't even pass the smell test and it is going to catch up with us. It's easy to mock because it's easy to mock; That isn't the problem of people who call it out, it's the problem of people who accept and defend it. Just because some people find it stressful to study, raise a family and work full-time (in a different role) all at the same time doesn't mean the preparation is rigorous.

I wouldn't hesitate to reduce work hours and every other responsibility as much as possible in order to commit time to studying if you decide to continue on this path.

Specializes in Dialysis.
21 minutes ago, T-Bird78 said:

Remind the guy making fun of midlevels misdiagnosing pts that a physician must agree with and sign off on the midlevel’s assessment and tx, so the MD missed it also!

Not always, not all states require an MD sign off, as NPs have independent practice

Specializes in Nurse Leader specializing in Labor & Delivery.
1 hour ago, T-Bird78 said:

Remind the guy making fun of midlevels misdiagnosing pts that a physician must agree with and sign off on the midlevel’s assessment and tx, so the MD missed it also!

Not necessarily- depends on the state. In many states, NPs practice independently. There is no physician “sign off”.

Specializes in Physiology, CM, consulting, nsg edu, LNC, COB.
9 hours ago, VaniCCRN said:

As if it wasn’t enough, the negative comments about NPs are rather excessive, particularly from Reddit groups and forums like StudentDoctor, where medical students, resident physicians, and even attending physicians rant and complain about “mid-level” scope creeping. They post horror stories of misdiagnosed aneurysm, peritonitis, and ectopic pregnancies. I’ve even seen one Reddit user that devotes his entire account to creating fictional tales of an NP, he portrays the NP in a satirical and sarcastic manner, magnifying their medical mistakes.

This is more reflective of them than any nurse. Can you say, "Projection"? There isn't a physician on the planet who hasn't missed a serious diagnosis: search and sign up for the excellent Med Mal Insights blog online (they also print submissions from nurses!). God knows there's plenty of opportunities to see mocking of med students, residents, and "even attendings" online and on TV/video.

"Mid-level" is a pejorative term. For some reason these folks like PAs better than NPs, even though in many states NPs can practice independently and PAs never can. Well, wups, maybe that's why. YOu don't need to pay any more attention to that, or their opinion, than you do to the jerk who says "Only a nurse, only follows MD orders."

You know more than you think, you will learn more as you practice (just like they do), and you will be more present for your patients than they ever will. That's why you do what you're doing, isn't it? Research shows you'll have higher pt satisfaction, fewer hospital readmits, and lower costs than physicians (and that's the other big threat: follow the money) for the bulk of family practice/PCP case load: COPD, CHF, DM, and the like. Chill out. YOu can do this.

Specializes in SCRN.

I wouldn't check the Reddit anymore.

Consider going part-time for the time of Master's program. You will most likely have to pay more for health insurance compared to full time, but it's doable.

Best of luck! If being a provider is what you always wanted, with enough determination, you will get there.

Specializes in Community health.
8 hours ago, RN-to- BSN said:

I wouldn't check the Reddit anymore.

This. What I can say is that at both the clinic where I work, and the one where I’m a patient, the MDs and the APRNs have a really good working relationship. Both parties understand their roles and the different skills they bring to patient care. Nobody is in a pissing contest about who is better— they are different roles. Reddit is for angry people. If it makes you feel terrible to read it, DON’T. 

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