Pt having a "friend" over for "special nursing care"

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You know what I mean. . .a patient having someone of the opposite sex (or the same sex! that's happened too) that they are romantically involved with, spend the night (thankfully in a private room) and performing overt sex acts, to the horror of the poor CNA who has to come in and fix her tele leads, which have obviously come loose from all the activity.

I was horrified to know that not only does my hospital not have a policy against this, but the house supervisor told me I was not allowed to tell them to stop! These are sick people here! I understand people say they have "physical needs," but can we draw a line somewhere?!

Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
I totally agree. As often as I cringe at the many "your, you're" and "their, there, and they're" errors made every day on AN by people who should absolutely know better, I think it's great that you reminded us that English is not the primary language of many who post here. We never know the background of the person we are so tempted to correct, which is why I mused that this particular fact could be one of the reasons that correcting grammar and spelling mistakes is against TOS.
Last off topic....it mostly applies to text speak and gross consistent issues. Auto-correct are to blame for many and we can't possibly track and correct them all with over 800,000 members with volunteer staff....LOL
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Specializes in Critical Care.
Yes, and it is the hospital's right to administratively discharge people who don't wish to comply with the recommended treatment. I'm with the "if they're well enough to have sex, they're well enough to go home" contingent on this.

Not really, no. It's actually illegal for most hospitals to discharge someone because they refuse to comply with the recommended treatment, unless they have refused every single last assessment or treatment that could be done for them. CMS participating hospitals are required by CMS rules to allow patients to refuse treatments without any sort of punishment, many states also have similar laws that apply to even non-CMS-participating hospitals in those states.

I would agree that for most hospitalized patients, sex isn't an option, but it's certainly not true for all. I've worked pre-transplant care, where coordinating conjugal visit time is part of the routine. Where it has come up with tele is patients such as tikosyn induction patients. There's typically nothing that restricts their ability to have sex from a medical safety standpoint, they are basically just there to get two pills a day followed by two 12-leads a day with continuous tele in between. I make sure they know how to tell on their room monitor when a lead is off and how to fix it, plus, I knock, so there isn't likely to be any issues. It seems in general we're overestimating the number of people for whom sex isn't safe, based on the recommendations if they can go for a walk then then it's safe to have sex.

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In LTC IMO it's perfectly reasonable to put up a "do not disturb" sign on the doorknob. It is their home. What people do in the privacy of their home is not my business.

But the hospital is a public place. They are there for medical and nursing treatment. It's the workplace of many who may not want to see live Media while on the job--possibly even 16-17 yr old minors. (My first employer was a LTC + rural hospital in one building; many of the CNAs and dietary workers were under 18.) Yes I know that a LTC facility could be my employer, but again that is also their home which carries more weight. The hospital isn't.

Maybe that makes me a prude, but it's my $0.02.

Regardless of any other aspect of this type is situation,

sex does not equal Media!

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Specializes in CVICU.
Maybe I'm mean, but if you're well enough to have sex, you're well enough to go home.

^^^^ This ^^^^

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Maybe I'm mean, but if you're well enough to have sex, you're well enough to go home.

People keep repeating this as if it's indisputable fact, when it really isn't necessarily true for all patients, possibly for many patients.

That is completely separate from the question of whether one SHOULD because one CAN.

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Specializes in Medical Oncology, Alzheimer/dementia.

I was just thinking, when the patient and their guest start getting a little frisky, how nice it would be to get an honest call from the patient that they don't want to be disturbed. They call for everything else.

I work night shift. This has happened to me a few times. I knock to announce my entrance, and I'm told "don't come in here", or "give us a few minutes"..etc... It doesn't take a genius to figure out what's going on. If the tele monitor is going crazy, and the situation seems awkward, I'll just ask the patient if everything is okay. I've seen the monitor go more haywire from the patient just getting up to the bathroom.

On my floor, there's not much that surprises me anymore. I've seen it all...and what has been seen cannot be unseen.

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I wouldn't choose to enjoy sex in a hospital, but I won't judge patients that do. It's none of my business, provided the patient is consenting (awake, alert) and a legal adult.

My former Ethics professor summed it up like this:

Patients are not your employee, or your co-worker. They are your employer. They are paying you to provide a service. They are paying the hospital/LTC for the room. They can perform whatever sex acts they so choose whether alone, or with a consenting adult, in the room they are paying for. It's none of your business, and they do have a right to privacy.

Think of a hospital room or LTC room as the equivalent of a hotel room. You are room service/housekeeping. Always knock before entering, and leave the room and close the door if you walk in on a private act.

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Specializes in Pediatrics, Emergency, Trauma.
I wouldn't choose to enjoy sex in a hospital, but I won't judge patients that do. It's none of my business, provided the patient is consenting (awake, alert) and a legal adult.

My former Ethics professor summed it up like this:

Patients are not your employee, or your co-worker. They are your employer. They are paying you to provide a service. They are paying the hospital/LTC for the room. They can perform whatever sex acts they so choose whether alone, or with a consenting adult, in the room they are paying for. It's none of your business, and they do have a right to privacy.

Think of a hospital room or LTC room as the equivalent of a hotel room. You are room service/housekeeping. Always knock before entering, and leave the room and close the door if you walk in on a private act.

I agree with the anology, I do, but I will not think of the hospital room or LTC room as a hotel room...I just can't. :no:

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Apples and oranges. Your comment was not logical :/

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Apples and oranges. Your comment was not logical :/

I apologize if this comment was not directed to me (I am on my phone and cannot view the full site), but wanted to reply:

The 'illogical' comment was a relay from a former Ethics professor. If you have a definition of exactly how his comment is 'apples and oranges', and illogical, please share?

LadyFree, I know that it is difficult to think of a hospital room/LTC room like a glorified Hotel room, but that was his analogy.

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Patients have the right to refuse meds, refuse care, refuse certain aspects of care, refuse nursing interventions, meals, housekeeping, and have the right to be non-compliant. If the hospital/LTC has no clear policy--acknowledged by the patient at the time of admission--patients in a private room should have an expectation of privacy, including personal sex acts.

If one knocks on the door for med-pass or labs, and the patient says 'not right now', and you announce you have Meds/need labs, and they still do not invite you in, they are refusing their Meds/labs. Although an inconvenience for we nurses, their rights trump our convenience.

None of this applies, of course, when there are indications that life saving care may be urgently required.

At the hospital, I was caring for a convicted pedophile with a new trach (under the watch of the guard). I began setting up my sterile field, and the patient whipped it out and began to pleasure himself. I stopped, turned my back, and informed the patient and guard that I would return when he was ready for trach care. I left and closed the door.

Did it suck to have to do that, especially knowing that he was a recently convicted pedophile? Heck yes! But I was required to give him the same rights and care that I would any other patient.

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While I believe sex in the hospital is inappropriate, it would sure help the wee morning hours pass quickly as the nurses joked about it. The annoying aspect is the inevitable injury ( falling out of bed, pulling out lines), or perhaps death, & the anger & blame family directs at the nurses. And of courses, there would be the failing service surveys because we failed to provide condoms and lube.

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I was just thinking, when the patient and their guest start getting a little frisky, how nice it would be to get an honest call from the patient that they don't want to be disturbed. They call for everything else.

And could they then put the call light where they won't accidentally hit it. And have their fun where they won't hit the emergency call light in the bathroom.

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