Patients who can do ADLs but want nurses to

Nurses Relations

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I've been coming across more and more patients that are perfectly capable of taking care of their personal needs, but simply don't want to.

Example: ringing the call light to ask for the box of tissues that is a whopping 4 feet away and they have no physical reason to inhibit their ability to reach or get up and get them.

Or the female pt that wants us to clean her after voiding yet she walked into the bathroom herself and did her makeup/ curled her hair that morning...

How do you get the message across that we are not the maids/ wait staff/ personal assistant without making pt feel bad or making them angry? It's so frustrating.

Specializes in ER, progressive care.

Reminds me of a patient I had who was in contact for scabies....they would call for EVERY LITTLE THING. Independent with their ADL's, too. The problem was, when we answered the call light phone and asked what she needed, all she would say was, "I NEED MY NURSE!" or "I NEED MY AIDE!" So we had to don all of our battle gear each. and. every. time. ugh. One time I went in and she asked me for a piece of toast. Seriously?!

As for patients who are perfectly capable of doing their own peri-care but want us to...that is gross. I would be embarrassed if someone else was doing my peri-care and I could do it on my own. I would MUCH RATHER do it on my own. Patients are weird.

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When I was a nurse assistant I saw this happening all the time!! So every time I walked the pt to the bathroom I would make sure they had everything they needed to get cleaned up. I usually said to them, in our unit it is our goal to make the pts as independent as possible after surgery and before discharge. We want to make sure pt is stable to walk, able to take a shower or clean herself up, we want to make sure you can be as independent as possible at your own home. I had pts who were not stable to walk on their own and also in so much pain postop. I had to give bed baths, I would tell the pt I will hand you a wash cloth and I want you to clean up every area you can reach. I will help you with your legs and back( specific). When I first started working as a nurse assistant I was doing everything for the pts until a seasoned nurse told me to use the words mentioned above! Saved my life !

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Specializes in LTC Rehab Med/Surg.

I try to make sense out of things that make no sense. If I can figure out why people do what they do, then I can direct my interventions appropriately. Some people are just weird. I can't possibly think like them. OK...A different weird than me:) The others, that are perfectly normal, nice, 60-80 yr olds who just expect in the hospital what they don't need, surely I can figure it out.

I think it's all about control/power. It's what makes the whole world turn. Only I can't figure out why a perfectly normal, able bodied person, would give up their control to someone else. Or why that would only occur in the hospital.

The only thing any of us can completely control is ourselves. When our bodies act up, we go to the hospital and we control nothing. Would that make the pt feel helpless?

Then I think, who's in control when the pt demands peri care they can do themselves? Who's in control then? It certainly isn't me, who's expected to do anything to make the pt happy.

I overthink everything. I need to take the psych hat off cause it just makes my head spin and my brain hurt.

Maybe it's just as simple as some people are just weird.

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Weird is celebrated these days all over the media. Nobody has simple pride anymore.

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Specializes in Med-Surg.
I try to make sense out of things that make no sense. If I can figure out why people do what they do, then I can direct my interventions appropriately. Some people are just weird. I can't possibly think like them. OK...A different weird than me:) The others, that are perfectly normal, nice, 60-80 yr olds who just expect in the hospital what they don't need, surely I can figure it out.

I think it's all about control/power. It's what makes the whole world turn. Only I can't figure out why a perfectly normal, able bodied person, would give up their control to someone else. Or why that would only occur in the hospital.

The only thing any of us can completely control is ourselves. When our bodies act up, we go to the hospital and we control nothing. Would that make the pt feel helpless?

Then I think, who's in control when the pt demands peri care they can do themselves? Who's in control then? It certainly isn't me, who's expected to do anything to make the pt happy.

I overthink everything. I need to take the psych hat off cause it just makes my head spin and my brain hurt.

Maybe it's just as simple as some people are just weird.

Aha! I think you nailed it right on the head. By making us wipe their goodies, something most people would see as unpleasant, even degrading, they feel powerful, in control. 'See what I can make you do!? Do my bidding now, otherwise I will complain and you will get in trouble, for I am the Almighty Customer!' Do I think the patient with this thinking is normal? Of course not. Definitely some kind of personality disorder. But I do think that with many of them, it's about control, and them exerting it over the HCWs.

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Specializes in CDI Supervisor; Formerly NICU.

Not a single one of my patients will change their own diaper. :(

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Not a single one of my patients will change their own diaper. :(
Babies are so lazy these days. I blame the parents.
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Jeweles26,

Hot Pepper Peri Wipes! Somebody is gonna produce this and make millions! LOL!

The 40 yr old male perv in for elective knee upon first experience with the Hot Pepper Peri Wipe:

"Daaaaaaamn let me wipe my butt from now on! When you do it it burns like @*&^!#"

Problem ...solved.

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Specializes in Med-Surg.
Jeweles26,

Hot Pepper Peri Wipes! Somebody is gonna produce this and make millions! LOL!

The 40 yr old male perv in for elective knee upon first experience with the Hot Pepper Peri Wipe:

"Daaaaaaamn let me wipe my butt from now on! When you do it it burns like @*&^!#"

Problem ...solved.

Love it netglow, love it. I'll go 50/50 with ya!

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Hmm capsacin instead of calmoseptine?

Love it netglow, love it. I'll go 50/50 with ya!
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Specializes in Critical Care.

[quote="imintrouble;7188014"

Then I think, who's in control when the pt demands peri care they can do themselves? Who's in control then? rd.

On par with my thoughts. Also some people come in very sick and weak and need this personal care but for some reason the techs/ nurses continue to assume/out of habit do it for them.

Also, in the hospital a lot of things are done *to* you by strangers. Perhaps they feel this is something that is done *for*them?

I think it is a control issue. They are not happy about being sick and in a twisted way, they passive aggressively take it out ON techs/nurses. As if to say, " ha!!! I'll show u what happens when you make me swallow horse pills and force a renal diet on me !"

Cuz these type of people know nurses are in the end respsonsible for ensuring hygiene is complete and stating that someone forced u to sit in a diaper of pee for 10hrs shocks and upsets others.

IMHO, of course! :-)

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Specializes in Clinical Research, Outpt Women's Health.

I just think they are freaks. LOL.

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