Parent harassing me in clinic

[KiddoRN73]

I am having a situation at work with a parent (who sadly also happens to be a nurse) harassing me in my clinic. CPS was called on her (not by me) at school and she assumes it was me. Don't get me wrong, I would have reported her if I would have thought there was a reason to, but the child told me they had accidentally hurt themself, then changed the story later in the day. Regardless, now Mom keeps coming into my clinic and spewing hate at me. I am being supported by administration, but the situation makes me feel very uneasy. Has anyone else had to deal with this type of issue? What did you do about it?

The school is getting a better security situation next year, but currently anyone can just walk in the front door and get to my clinic.

[UrbanHealthRN, BSN, RN]

I am so sorry to hear you are going through this right now. It's hard enough being a nurse- you don't need this from a parent.

I had an incident a couple years ago where I called CPS on a child, and it was a justified call (I was catching the tip of the iceberg- offending parent was removed from the home about a month later after a second call was made). Due to the nature of the call, I did not disclose my contacting CPS to the family.

The offending parent was VERY upset that CPS had gone out to the home, and he and his girlfriend were repeatedly calling my building, asking to speak with the nurse, at one point even hanging out in the parking lot during drop off, I guess looking for me.

I refused to meet with the family alone, and definitely not before I had followed up with the CPS worker. Once I had a CPS update, I met with the parents and had two other staff present. Honestly, I don't know how any of us would have gotten through that meeting alone. Some staff were skeptical of my requesting assistance, but the way I see it, if a parent is unstable enough to harm a child, who knows what else they might do?

Long story short, establish your boundaries with this woman yesterday. If she comes into your office alone, step out and get back up. Meet in an area with others present. Just please do not be alone with her, for your safety and your sanity.

Also, if admin hasn't done this yet, consider a staff meeting with mom where school rules and state law re: CPS calls are reviewed. The meeting should NOT be a time to out the staff member who called CPS- this woman does not seem like a safe person to be disclosing that info to. And anyways, mom should be getting the message that child safety is a TEAM effort, with all staff supporting each other.

[DeeAngel]

File a police report and seek a restraining order. If she shows up after that call. 911 on her.

[MrNurse(x2), ADN]

Not sure if you are public or private, but I understand the hesitance if you are private, LOTS of politics. Maybe tell admin that you are very fearful of this woman and she is acting differently when it is just you. I would ask them to let her know they know her behavior and will bar her from the school. The shame of not being able to participate at the school should quell her behavior immediately.

[KiddoRN73]

Thanks to everyone for your comments and advice! Dealing with 70+ visits a day and this was beginning to feel very overwhelming. I think I just needed some fellow nurses' input.

I spoke to my supervisor in health services and school administrators about my concerns. The plan is if she comes in & attempts to talk to me I immediately refer her to administration and let her know this topic is no longer up for discussion with me.

My principal says she has no issue with telling her she's not welcome on campus anymore.

I have attempted contacting the CPS investigator to let her know what is going on, and how irrational she is acting, but have not heard back from her yet.

One of the local police officers that comes to our campus on occasion should be there tomorrow and I will get his opinion as well.

Thanks again for all of your suggestions & support! Hopefully this will all be resolved soon.

[NRSKarenRN, BSN, RN]

School nurses all have great ideas how to handle situation. Adding my 2 cents: get an air horn to keep in your desk as an emergency alert to get quick help.

Let us know how situation resolves.

[Nursesusu]

Had this happen to me not long ago. I did a DCS call on a foster student. Foster mom told secretary she needed to talk to me and secretary let her in. She stood between me and my door, then proceeded to shut my door and lay into me. Her biggest gripe? That she could potentially lose her foster care money. Not whether said report was true. (Which is was). This chick could have snapped me like a twig. I told secretary don't EVER let her in my office again. I would be happy to talk to her in the front office or in the Principal's office. She never came back.

[tining, BSN, RN]

Well I was just in a heated (her not me) conversation with a parent at the front desk. I was checking in at secretary desk and she was on the phone with a parent trying to drop off meds. Mom upset that front desk would not accept meds, only RN or designee could accept and I was not here. It was 0740 and I actually don't have to be here until 0815. Mom wanted to know my back-up, which I told her. Mom wanted policy, which of course states only RN or designee can accept. Mom wants convenience prioritized over policy. Now wants to meet with me and principal. What is interesting is I have always had a good relationship with this parent. This is out of the blue.

[SaltineQueen]

21 minutes ago, tining said:

Well I was just in a heated (her not me) conversation with a parent at the front desk. I was checking in at secretary desk and she was on the phone with a parent trying to drop off meds. Mom upset that front desk would not accept meds, only RN or designee could accept and I was not here. It was 0740 and I actually don't have to be here until 0815. Mom wanted to know my back-up, which I told her. Mom wanted policy, which of course states only RN or designee can accept. Mom wants convenience prioritized over policy. Now wants to meet with me and principal. What is interesting is I have always had a good relationship with this parent. This is out of the blue.

Who is your designee if not the secretary?

[ruby_jane, BSN, RN]

8 hours ago, NRSKarenRN said:

School nurses all have great ideas how to handle situation. Adding my 2 cents: get an air horn to keep in your desk as an emergency alert to get quick help.

Let us know how situation resolves.

I hereby award NRSKarenRN the OldDude award for humor under fire!!!

[tining, BSN, RN]

My registrar is designee.

[guest464345]

I called CPS last year for a teenaged kid (with an intellectual disability, functioning at maybe a 5-6 year old level) who came to school constantly dirty, wearing the same clothes for days on end, with various suspicious bruises, who finally showed up with a huge black eye and stated the parent had done it.

I called CPS and the police. The police picked the parent up on another warrant - a weapons charge - that afternoon. The parent's spouse almost immediately called my office to cuss me out at length, assuming or somehow knowing that I had called CPS.

Two mornings later, I arrive at school and the receptionist cheerfully informs me, "(Student's parent) is here to see you!" That's right, parent bailed out of jail and immediately popped by the school for no particular reason.

NOPE. nope nope nope. I said no way, I went behind a locked door and told my administrator no way. I'll talk on the phone, but I'm not having a 1:1 chat alone in my office with the face-punching person who just went to jail knowing or believing that I was the cause.

The principal was like, "Oh yeah. OK. Yeah, I guess that makes sense, I can see your point." Like, it seriously hadn't occurred to him that there might be any problem. We have to advocate for our safe nursing practice and our own safety....no one else is going to do it in a school setting, unfortunately.

[BeckyESRN]

1 hour ago, SaltineQueen said:

Who is your designee if not the secretary?

In my building, only myself or the principal can accept medications.