Our Own Misconceptions

Nurses General Nursing

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Guys, please bear with me. Normally, I'd find the thread about public misconceptions pretty funny. I might even have my own additions. But this morning, I am just a bit bristly, and I find it really offensive. That's not your fault, it's mine. Like I said, my emotions are a bit raw this morning. See, we are taking my mother home from a rehab hospital (s/p fall with femur fracture), taking her off all of her meds (a list as long as my right arm, including lasix and digoxin) to allow her to pass peacefully. We will of course, put her back on her pain medicine (a story unto itself, I'll get there). This morning, I am a bit angry with the whole medical profession. OK if I vent?

First, my mother. 87 years old, severe short term memory impairment, hypertensive, hx of CHF, severe, painful osteoporosis, hx of lung cancer with lobectomy, recurrent lung cancer with metz. (Actually, there's lots more, that's just the worst of it.) And before I forget, chronic, severe pain for which she has been taking both oxycontin and percocet long term. Late last week, she fell and fractured her femur. My brother, who she lives with, called the ambulance. Seen at the hospital by an orthopod, who told my family that fractured femur repair was "resident surgery" and that mom would come through it "just fine!" (Know what two orthopods studying an EKG is called? A double blind and stupid study.) I asked prior to the surgery if anyone planned to discuss the surgery with anesthesia. "No, the surgeon said it would be OK, and I wouldn't know what to ask anyway!" (This from a brother with is a clinical Psychologist, married to a family practice DO who specializes in geriatric patients. In fact, that little brother, who happens to be a CRNA, would even have the cheek to ask is pretty annoying.) Of course, orthopedics gave my family the option of "taking mom home and letting her die of a broken leg," along the way not mentioning that she could be made comfortable, allowed to pass peacefully without surgical intervention that would likely as not kill her. But then, how could an orthopedic surgeon bill for that? "What's in it for me?"

She gets through the surgery, but upon emergence from anesthesia, is essentially unresponsive. This has been her pattern with surgery in the last few years, and it takes her several days to get over. Two days after surgery, she is discharged from the hospital, and sent to a rehab hospital. Day one at the rehab hospital, a physical therapist comes in to work with her. During the session, her sats drop (surprise!!). Let's get a chest x-ray!. Oooh, look! Spots on the lung! Is that metz, atelectisis, or maybe pneumonia? Don't know! Wonder if there is another CXR to compare it to? Maybe at the hospital?? Well, gee. We can't have anyone with spots on their x-ray at the rehab hospital!! But, that night, my sister the veterinarian finds mom pretty alert. The next morning (yesterday), she is alarmed to find mom far less alert, but far more agitated. A little investigation reveals why. The nurses at the rehab hospital, following protocol (orders?) took my mom off ALL her pain medications, and replaced them all (MS IV and IM, oxycontin, percocet) with Tylenol. Why? Well, that's what we do at the rehab hospital! (What, rehab ignores history and makes patients suffer because they can't be bothered with understanding chronic pain? They can't treat patients unless they patients can come off all pain meds?)

So, after this tragedy of errors and arrogance, after going through surgery, transfers, hideous pain, a lack of caring, and plain, blind stupidity, we are finally going to take my mom home to let her "go in peace." We could have done this a week ago, and saved her so much suffering. The thought of it brings tears back to my eyes.

And believe me, there is plenty of anger for my family as well. Since I am "just a nurse," I can't possibly know as much as my brilliant SIL who is a doctor. I can't be as smart as my genius brother, who is a psychologist I couldn't even be as knowledgeable as my pretty bright sister, who is a veterinarian. I'm "just a nurse." Nevermind that I've worked in ICU's. Nevermind that I am now a CRNA. I am just a servant of physicians, and couldn't possibly have any real knowledge.

So, maybe try to put yourself in the patient's shoes. Sure, some are a PIA. But others are not. Maybe that lady on the vent banging on her bed rail trying to get your attention is in pain. Or maybe she's frightened and just needs a little TLC. Maybe that patient you figure is just drug seeking really is in pain, and needs those meds to function on a day to day basis.

Sorry, this is rambling and venting. I know that. I also know you all to be pretty compassionate. We all need to vent about patients sometimes. This is just my turn to vent about how some people in the profession treat patients. Again, I apologize if I stepped on any toes. Thanks for listening, I really needed to vent. I'll be back after mom's funeral.

Kevin McHugh

I am so sorry for the pain you all have been through. Your family will be in my prayers.

Specializes in Utilization Management.

Like others, I too am shocked that your mother's pain meds were taken away given her history and diagnosis.

I'm so very sorry that the health care system that we all play such a critical part of, has failed anyone, but especially one of our own.

You and your family are in my thoughts, Kevin.

Specializes in Med-Surg.
I have never heard of taking a pt off of pain meds for rehab. In my rehab experience, staff is to be certain that pt has been adequately medicated for pain 1hr prior to starting a PT session. However, I did have to give most MS04 and Demerol IM, the most painful way to get it! I couldn't get the docs to let us use another route.

As others have said, hospice is a wonderful thing. (Former hospice nurse, here).

So sorry for your mother's and your bad experience. I hope she is free from suffering now.

You are still using Demerol? Not a good drug for the elderly. There are so many more options for pain management. :uhoh21:

Specializes in NICU.

Kevin, I'm so sorry. What a rough time for you and your mom (and your family, too). I hope you know we care. You're in my prayers.

Kevin, you have my sympathy. I'll not go into details either, but my dad, walked into the hospital at 8 a.m., was d/c'd at 2 p.m., never to take another step, at 7 a.m. the next morning he had died in his sleep. I still cringe when I have to drive past this particular hospital. Bless you and your family.

Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.

OH dear, Kevin, your plate is full. I am sorry to read all of this. And I am sorry you have been disrespected as a CRNA. I have total respect for all nurses, CRNA's of course, included. You are right; nursing is highly misunderstood and misconstrued.

Let me say, I am very sorry about your mom. My thoughts are with you and your family. I wish I could say more to help.

Just got home last night. Mom passed away peacefully in her sleep on May 27th at 1:30 in the afternoon. She was under the care of hospice, and in no pain. I made it home in time to see her and spend a little time talking with her before she died. She was foggy and in and out for the last few days, but was able to remind us all of her love for us. She also kept her wonderful sense of humor to the end. On my arrival, she could no longer focus her eyes very well, so I had to tell her I was there, and who I was. She responded "Oh, my baby son. I always loved telling people you were my baby son!" (I'm 6'3" +) She even asked for (and got, I might add) a small gin and tonic the day before she died. She was never much of a drinker, but man she sure loved an occasional "G&T."

All my kids also made it to KC in time to see her before she passed, and her last words to my oldest daughter were perhaps the most telling of her character. Beckie (daughter) told my mother "I love you Grandma" to which my mother responded "I love you too, Beckie. You can never say that enough."

While her experiences with the rehab hospital can serve as a reminder to us all about remembering that patients are individuals with differing needs, I am satisfied that her passing was peaceful, without pain, and that she was surrounded by love. Thank you all for your kind words of support. They mean more to me than you could possibly know.

Kevin

Specializes in Trauma,ER,CCU/OHU/Nsg Ed/Nsg Research.

I am so, so sorry for your loss.

Specializes in Clinical Research, Outpt Women's Health.

Thank you for the update. It sounded peaceful and kind and brought tears to my eyes. My thoughts are with you and your family. I hope you are proud that you did such a wonderful job advocating for your mom. Every mom should have a son like you.

Specializes in Med-Surg, Trauma, Ortho, Neuro, Cardiac.

My condolences Kevin.

Specializes in ER.

Kevin, brought tears to my eyes...I hope your mom is in a peaceful place...It sounds like she was a lovely lady...

...I am satisfied that her passing was peaceful, without pain, and that she was surrounded by love.

I am happy you and your family could all be there with her. Thank you for sharing your moving story with us here at allnurses.

I am sorry for your loss Kevin.

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