Our Own Misconceptions

Published

Guys, please bear with me. Normally, I'd find the thread about public misconceptions pretty funny. I might even have my own additions. But this morning, I am just a bit bristly, and I find it really offensive. That's not your fault, it's mine. Like I said, my emotions are a bit raw this morning. See, we are taking my mother home from a rehab hospital (s/p fall with femur fracture), taking her off all of her meds (a list as long as my right arm, including lasix and digoxin) to allow her to pass peacefully. We will of course, put her back on her pain medicine (a story unto itself, I'll get there). This morning, I am a bit angry with the whole medical profession. OK if I vent?

First, my mother. 87 years old, severe short term memory impairment, hypertensive, hx of CHF, severe, painful osteoporosis, hx of lung cancer with lobectomy, recurrent lung cancer with metz. (Actually, there's lots more, that's just the worst of it.) And before I forget, chronic, severe pain for which she has been taking both oxycontin and percocet long term. Late last week, she fell and fractured her femur. My brother, who she lives with, called the ambulance. Seen at the hospital by an orthopod, who told my family that fractured femur repair was "resident surgery" and that mom would come through it "just fine!" (Know what two orthopods studying an EKG is called? A double blind and stupid study.) I asked prior to the surgery if anyone planned to discuss the surgery with anesthesia. "No, the surgeon said it would be OK, and I wouldn't know what to ask anyway!" (This from a brother with is a clinical Psychologist, married to a family practice DO who specializes in geriatric patients. In fact, that little brother, who happens to be a CRNA, would even have the cheek to ask is pretty annoying.) Of course, orthopedics gave my family the option of "taking mom home and letting her die of a broken leg," along the way not mentioning that she could be made comfortable, allowed to pass peacefully without surgical intervention that would likely as not kill her. But then, how could an orthopedic surgeon bill for that? "What's in it for me?"

She gets through the surgery, but upon emergence from anesthesia, is essentially unresponsive. This has been her pattern with surgery in the last few years, and it takes her several days to get over. Two days after surgery, she is discharged from the hospital, and sent to a rehab hospital. Day one at the rehab hospital, a physical therapist comes in to work with her. During the session, her sats drop (surprise!!). Let's get a chest x-ray!. Oooh, look! Spots on the lung! Is that metz, atelectisis, or maybe pneumonia? Don't know! Wonder if there is another CXR to compare it to? Maybe at the hospital?? Well, gee. We can't have anyone with spots on their x-ray at the rehab hospital!! But, that night, my sister the veterinarian finds mom pretty alert. The next morning (yesterday), she is alarmed to find mom far less alert, but far more agitated. A little investigation reveals why. The nurses at the rehab hospital, following protocol (orders?) took my mom off ALL her pain medications, and replaced them all (MS IV and IM, oxycontin, percocet) with Tylenol. Why? Well, that's what we do at the rehab hospital! (What, rehab ignores history and makes patients suffer because they can't be bothered with understanding chronic pain? They can't treat patients unless they patients can come off all pain meds?)

So, after this tragedy of errors and arrogance, after going through surgery, transfers, hideous pain, a lack of caring, and plain, blind stupidity, we are finally going to take my mom home to let her "go in peace." We could have done this a week ago, and saved her so much suffering. The thought of it brings tears back to my eyes.

And believe me, there is plenty of anger for my family as well. Since I am "just a nurse," I can't possibly know as much as my brilliant SIL who is a doctor. I can't be as smart as my genius brother, who is a psychologist I couldn't even be as knowledgeable as my pretty bright sister, who is a veterinarian. I'm "just a nurse." Nevermind that I've worked in ICU's. Nevermind that I am now a CRNA. I am just a servant of physicians, and couldn't possibly have any real knowledge.

So, maybe try to put yourself in the patient's shoes. Sure, some are a PIA. But others are not. Maybe that lady on the vent banging on her bed rail trying to get your attention is in pain. Or maybe she's frightened and just needs a little TLC. Maybe that patient you figure is just drug seeking really is in pain, and needs those meds to function on a day to day basis.

Sorry, this is rambling and venting. I know that. I also know you all to be pretty compassionate. We all need to vent about patients sometimes. This is just my turn to vent about how some people in the profession treat patients. Again, I apologize if I stepped on any toes. Thanks for listening, I really needed to vent. I'll be back after mom's funeral.

Kevin McHugh

Specializes in ER.
Guys, please bear with me. Normally, I'd find the thread about public misconceptions pretty funny. I might even have my own additions. But this morning, I am just a bit bristly, and I find it really offensive. That's not your fault, it's mine. Like I said, my emotions are a bit raw this morning. See, we are taking my mother home from a rehab hospital (s/p fall with femur fracture), taking her off all of her meds (a list as long as my right arm, including lasix and digoxin) to allow her to pass peacefully. We will of course, put her back on her pain medicine (a story unto itself, I'll get there). This morning, I am a bit angry with the whole medical profession. OK if I vent?

First, my mother. 87 years old, severe short term memory impairment, hypertensive, hx of CHF, severe, painful osteoporosis, hx of lung cancer with lobectomy, recurrent lung cancer with metz. (Actually, there's lots more, that's just the worst of it.) And before I forget, chronic, severe pain for which she has been taking both oxycontin and percocet long term. Late last week, she fell and fractured her femur. My brother, who she lives with, called the ambulance. Seen at the hospital by an orthopod, who told my family that fractured femur repair was "resident surgery" and that mom would come through it "just fine!" (Know what two orthopods studying an EKG is called? A double blind and stupid study.) I asked prior to the surgery if anyone planned to discuss the surgery with anesthesia. "No, the surgeon said it would be OK, and I wouldn't know what to ask anyway!" (This from a brother with is a clinical Psychologist, married to a family practice DO who specializes in geriatric patients. In fact, that little brother, who happens to be a CRNA, would even have the cheek to ask is pretty annoying.) Of course, orthopedics gave my family the option of "taking mom home and letting her die of a broken leg," along the way not mentioning that she could be made comfortable, allowed to pass peacefully without surgical intervention that would likely as not kill her. But then, how could an orthopedic surgeon bill for that? "What's in it for me?"

She gets through the surgery, but upon emergence from anesthesia, is essentially unresponsive. This has been her pattern with surgery in the last few years, and it takes her several days to get over. Two days after surgery, she is discharged from the hospital, and sent to a rehab hospital. Day one at the rehab hospital, a physical therapist comes in to work with her. During the session, her sats drop (surprise!!). Let's get a chest x-ray!. Oooh, look! Spots on the lung! Is that metz, atelectisis, or maybe pneumonia? Don't know! Wonder if there is another CXR to compare it to? Maybe at the hospital?? Well, gee. We can't have anyone with spots on their x-ray at the rehab hospital!! But, that night, my sister the veterinarian finds mom pretty alert. The next morning (yesterday), she is alarmed to find mom far less alert, but far more agitated. A little investigation reveals why. The nurses at the rehab hospital, following protocol (orders?) took my mom off ALL her pain medications, and replaced them all (MS IV and IM, oxycontin, percocet) with Tylenol. Why? Well, that's what we do at the rehab hospital! (What, rehab ignores history and makes patients suffer because they can't be bothered with understanding chronic pain? They can't treat patients unless they patients can come off all pain meds?)

So, after this tragedy of errors and arrogance, after going through surgery, transfers, hideous pain, a lack of caring, and plain, blind stupidity, we are finally going to take my mom home to let her "go in peace." We could have done this a week ago, and saved her so much suffering. The thought of it brings tears back to my eyes.

And believe me, there is plenty of anger for my family as well. Since I am "just a nurse," I can't possibly know as much as my brilliant SIL who is a doctor. I can't be as smart as my genius brother, who is a psychologist I couldn't even be as knowledgeable as my pretty bright sister, who is a veterinarian. I'm "just a nurse." Nevermind that I've worked in ICU's. Nevermind that I am now a CRNA. I am just a servant of physicians, and couldn't possibly have any real knowledge.

So, maybe try to put yourself in the patient's shoes. Sure, some are a PIA. But others are not. Maybe that lady on the vent banging on her bed rail trying to get your attention is in pain. Or maybe she's frightened and just needs a little TLC. Maybe that patient you figure is just drug seeking really is in pain, and needs those meds to function on a day to day basis.

Sorry, this is rambling and venting. I know that. I also know you all to be pretty compassionate. We all need to vent about patients sometimes. This is just my turn to vent about how some people in the profession treat patients. Again, I apologize if I stepped on any toes. Thanks for listening, I really needed to vent. I'll be back after mom's funeral.

Kevin McHugh

I feel for you and your family!! When my littel brother suffered a TBI a few years ago he was in a coma for alomost 5 months. They wanted us to palce him in a nursing home becaue they did not think we should care for him at home, he had a trach, was incontinent the whole 9 yeards. But I told the social worker that he would go to a nursing home over my dead body!!! We brought him hoem and he woke up, went back to rehab and even graduated high school!!! We nurses know more then everyone thinks!!

Specializes in Med-Surg.

I'm sorry for all your mother and family has been through.

I have never heard of taking a pt off of pain meds for rehab. In my rehab experience, staff is to be certain that pt has been adequately medicated for pain 1hr prior to starting a PT session. However, I did have to give most MS04 and Demerol IM, the most painful way to get it! I couldn't get the docs to let us use another route.

As others have said, hospice is a wonderful thing. (Former hospice nurse, here).

So sorry for your mother's and your bad experience. I hope she is free from suffering now.

Specializes in LTC, assisted living, med-surg, psych.

{{{{{{{{{Kevin}}}}}}}}}

I am so sorry for what you and your dear mother have been going through.I don't know what it is with some medical professionals and the elderly......when my own mother was bouncing in and out of hospitals years ago, the doctors and even some of the nurses would talk to my sister and me, and they'd talk about her, over her, around her, through her, but never WITH her. It was as if because she was over 65, she didn't have ears to hear with, or a brain that was capable of processing information. I was still pretty young then, late 20s, and I wasn't a nurse at that time, but it just infuriated me that no one would listen to her or even talk directly to her; then one day I finally let this one MD have it, right there in the ICU. I told him "SHE is your patient, not me, and she deserves to know what's happening to her and what you're going to do about it".

I guess that sort of set the stage for when I did become an RN (and a fierce patient advocate, I might add) years later. But as you know, sometimes you can fight, and it's as if the entire world has gone deaf........it sounds to me like you're doing all you personally can to make sure she's taken care of properly, and believe me, you will sleep a lot better at night in the years to come knowing that you were the one who cared enough to provide for her comfort.

My thoughts and prayers are with you, my friend. :icon_hug:

...So, maybe try to put yourself in the patient's shoes. Sure, some are a PIA. But others are not. Maybe that lady on the vent banging on her bed rail trying to get your attention is in pain. Or maybe she's frightened and just needs a little TLC. Maybe that patient you figure is just drug seeking really is in pain, and needs those meds to function on a day to day basis.

Sorry, this is rambling and venting. I know that. I also know you all to be pretty compassionate. We all need to vent about patients sometimes. This is just my turn to vent about how some people in the profession treat patients. Again, I apologize if I stepped on any toes. Thanks for listening, I really needed to vent. I'll be back after mom's funeral.

Kevin McHugh

Kevin...

My Dad was complaining of severe abdominal pain. This is a man that never complained about anything. He couldn't sleep, he couldn't think, he couldn't function, he couldn't do anything. He had been previously dx'd w/colon CA but with chemo he was given his clean bill of health in Dec 04. By February he couldn't lay flat in a bed, he could only sit on the edge of a chair doubled over in pain. His idiot doc did do every bloody test in the book and they said they couldn't find anything. I knew what it was, I had no doubt in my mind.

When he was to the point he couldn't do anything but sit on the edge of a chair doubled over in pain I flew home. He was sick. Again, this was a no brainer. Nobody would listen to me. Finally I told them listen to this, admit this man or I will make your lives a living h*ll and if you don't believe me I d*mn well suggest you try me! They admitted him.

His surgeon came in and told him his problem was he was taking too many pain meds. I kept my mouth shut, my Dad has always known how to take care of himself. My Dad told him he needed the Oxy's, he couldn't stand the pain. The doc asked him if he would just consider that his gut pain was from too many Oxy's. My Dad said he would consider that if the surgeon would consider it wasn't the pain meds and something was actually wrong.

I saw the expression on my Dad's face and it made me sick. My Dad wasn't a drug seeker and he wasn't a liar. I followed the doc out and by the time we got in the hallway I let him have it with both barrels. I told him under no uncertain circumstances was he EVER to step foot in my Father's room again and if he thought my Dad was a PITA he ain't seen NOTHING yet! I had my finger in his chest and with each word it was digging deeper and deeper in his chest. I don't remember being that angry ever before. I had lost control.

After pretty well chasing him down the hallway I went to the nurses station and pleaded my case. I told them I'm a nurse and I don't know any of the docs around here, I'm from out of state and I need help. Please, tell me who to call. The nurse looked at me for a long time and realized I was serious. She wrote the name of a GI doc on a piece of paper and told me she was still in the hospital.

I tracked her down, I told her what happened. I begged her to come and see my Dad. She did. Within two hours my Dad was in OR for emergency surgery. He'd perf'd his viscus and was in bad shape. Another few hours and he would have been beyond hope.

His problem? Just as I suspected, his colon CA was back in full force.

That was 2/9/05. He died 4/26/05.

Kevin, I'm only telling you this to let you know that I understand all too well. I completely and totally understand what you are going through. Mothers and sons are a lot like fathers and daughters, so I do know.

(hugs)

Kevin, I am so sorry to hear that you and your mom have had to go through so much. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Specializes in Community Health Nurse.

((((((((((Kevin)))))))))) I'm so sorry that your mother, your siblings, and you are going through this, and my prayers are with you and your family as you care for your ailing mother. :kiss

Specializes in Critical Care/ICU.

Thank you for the title of this thread Kevin.

I will spare you the details of the horror story that resulted in the death of my dad and the overwhemling feelings that I'm still dealing with more than half a year later. In my case, the blatant medical errors and sub-standard nursing care is a very difficult thing to accept. Your situation seems compounded by those who you respect and love minimizing your efforts to ease your mom's journey.

I hope that you can find comfort in the peace that your mom will finally have.

I'm so sorry.

Specializes in Me Surge.

I'm really sorry to hear about your mother. And regarding rehab taking your mother off pain meds,let it be a reminder to all of us that doing some thing because 'its always done that way' or ' because the doctor ordered it' is not always the right thing to do.

My departure for my mother's home was delayed, as we waited for all the logistics of her move home to come together. I am actually happy to report that yesterday, my mother was moved back to my brother's home, where a hospital bed had been placed. She is now under the care of hospice. As of yesterday, the plan was still to take my mom off all meds but pain meds, and given her cardio-pulmonary history, I don't think the end will be far away at all. Typing that fills me sadness, but also with relief to know that my mother will no longer be in pain. But, who knows. We have all seen patients who continued to live in spite of what seemed to be overwhelming odds. And for as much as my family angers me, there is no question of their love for her, so no matter when she passes, I know she will go surrounded by love.

Thank all of you so much for your kind, caring words of support. They mean more to me than gold. I will update on my return.

Kevin McHugh

The story takes my breath away. I am so glad Mom is home with compassionate care. I can't believe a femur repair was considered appropriate care for someone with mets and osteoporosis. And that a post-op femur was supposed to make do with tylenol.

Dear Kevin,

I am very sorry to hear of your mothers illness. It's never easy to put meaning into these circumstances. I offer you my sincere sympathy and I will say a prayer for your mother this morning in hopes that she will remain in comfort and peace.

Ramon

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