Orlando Tragedy - "Why Does It Bother You So Much?"
Because a nurse I am friends with asked me why it mattered so much to me... I thought I would share this with all of you as well. LGBTQ culture is one of shared experiences. In the same way that nursing culture exists, so does LGBTQ. In the wake of the tragedy in Orlando, I find myself needing an outlet to express the fear and sadness that comes with it. My hope is in doing so, I can help those who do not know or understand the culture, get a small glimpse into it from my perspective.
This past weekend is still something that has struck fear into the core of my community, even though I live on the other side of the country. I'm not going to debate about how it could have been prevented, because hindsight is always 20/20. I'm not going to debate it because there are as many different ideas on how to prevent it as there are people who know about it. What I want to do is expose myself, and explain why something that happened so far away from me could affect me on such a personal level.
No matter what you call it, LGBT(Q,+,A), QUILTBAG, or my personal favorite Alphabet Soup Gang... there is a community out there for those of us who don't quite fit the norm. My favorite comes from the fact that we are all a bit alike, all a little different, and we're all floating in this big huge bowl we call Earth. Also the letters change all the time depending on who you talk to and if I am going to offend someone for using the wrong ones, at least I'm going down in style.
I get a little flack at times from the community, at times, for not getting it, because "you pass... no one knows unless you choose to tell them." See, I'm not what most people think of when they think of the LGBTQ. Mostly because I don't get all twiterpatted when I see someone posed in what someone would consider sexual nature. My response tends more towards "Oh... look at that... "and insert interesting bit of biology about their tattoo, a mole, or the muscle structure. I'm someone who dates for romance and companionship instead of physical attraction. I was married when I was younger. I'm Christian. I can easily come off as heterosexual with no time or too conservative to join the local dating scene. Personally I don't care about someone's gender. I date people for being interesting and kind hearted with similar interests. In the community I'm often referred to as panromantic. I don't usually bother with a label though.
At the same time, I've also been on the receiving end of attacks from people mad at me for not being interested in them. Be it because how dare I not be attracted, or because they think I just haven't met the right person yet, or just because I find comfort being around the others with the same experiences. Many of my first experiences out into the world involved going to the local "gay bar" to sing karaoke with all the other people who just didn't feel like they fit society's expectations for them. Going to a friend's place to support them because someone had threatened them.
Our culture, as a community comes from the places and experiences we have been through. We've had the awkward conversations with medical professionals when they ask if we are sexually active and the follow up is about birth control or pregnancy, and we end up outing ourselves to strangers who are not always understanding. We've been bullied for similar reasons. Been told we don't really exist. That we're going through a phase. Sometimes by the medical community itself. We trade names of providers who are "safe" like most people trade the titles of their favorite books.
It bothers me because... those people who were hurt and died... I have a common thread to them. I cried when I found out what happened. Those people were someone's child, parent, cousin, friend... They remind me of my own monkey sphere of people I know. Even if it hadn't been people I know... I've seen the threats towards LGBTQ and Muslim students at my school. I go to an awesome school in a progressive area. We are great and inclusive and that things like that still happen... is scary. It bothers me that media wants to focus on who did it and how, rather than the bright and brilliant people who are lost to the community.
It's something that should bother everyone. It should bother us all. Today it was the LGBTQ community. It's happening in black communities. It happens in our schools. Even if we have no personal connection to what has happened, it should at the very least bother us, because who is to know what the next target of choice will be. If we can't find a way to be bothered that people died because someone's personally held belief was so strong they felt it was alright to kill someone... even if we disagree with the person's lifestyle, they didn't deserve this. No one does, and that bothers me.
This article has really frustrated me. What in the world does this have to do with NURSING? Such an "in your face" politically driven agenda in words. As a nurse, I have taken an oath that goes beyond all these politically correct agendas. I will be the first to say that the LBGT community's practice is an abomination to Gods will. But I would NEVER refuse as a Nurse or Christian to provide medical care.
Please...get back to having articles that deal with issues related to the practice of nursing and not the "push" of an agenda!
I agree with OffLabel. This had nothing to do with the LBGT community and EVERYTHING to do with a terrorist attack on Americans in a GUN FREE ZONE (sitting ducks).
If we started calling out the real problems in this country and stopped with the PC BS ("Islamaphobia"??????) we might actually be able to deal with this problem. In the meantime, just arm yourself as is your RIGHT.
The second amendment has nothing to do with the military. Is the First Amendment about GOVERNMENT free speech?
This article has really frustrated me. What in the world does this have to do with NURSING? Such an "in your face" politically driven agenda in words. As a nurse, I have taken an oath that goes beyond all these politically correct agendas. I will be the first to say that the LBGT community's practice is an abomination to Gods will. But I would NEVER refuse as a Nurse or Christian to provide medical care.
Please...get back to having articles that deal with issues related to the practice of nursing and not the "push" of an agenda!
I happen to be Christian, oddly enough, and still be part of the LGBT community. The whole purpose of this article was to allow myself to educate others on the culture of the LGBT community and humanize the victims. The whole Christian/LGBT debate has happened, more than once on the forums. This is not about pushing that agenda. This is about promoting awareness of the culture. You don't have to agree with someone's choices to provide care for them, but being aware of the culture and what the person may be going through can help provide better care.
If you read the article again, I would suggest the paragraph talking about healthcare providers being judgemental while providing care, or the paragraph where I describe my not being sexually attracted to people as being especially important to nurses. They are meant to help nurses avoid common mistakes like accidently coming off as judgemental, having a bias, or assuming that LGBTQ means that the person is sexual. It's not meant to make you believe differently. We all have patients we won't agree with, but we should know enough to be able to treat them respectfully. Love thy brother as you love thyself.
Maybe it's the rose colored glasses of being a student, and graduating soon, but I didn't say when I signed up for this "I'll treat everyone medically." I said "I will treat everyone in a way I would want to be treated." So yes, I'm going to take care of them physically, but I want to take care of them emotionally and mentally as well and that requires understanding what they want and need from me.
And everyone using this thread and this entire situation to discuss gun laws and such, please stop. It takes away a lot from the seriousness and emotions people have regarding this tragedy. Stop pushing political agendas on posts about a MASS SHOOTING of a targeted community.
unfortunately, the people with an agenda are using this attack as cover to attack another "politically incorrect" group - gun owners. The fact that gun owners & the lgbt community aren't necessarily overtly "friendly" to each other only helps those with the agenda, though I think there's more support for the "pink pistols" in the "hetero/bubba gun-lover" community than anyone would expect. Divide & conquer works really well in this situation & your post proves that.
I agree with OffLabel. This had nothing to do with the LBGT community and EVERYTHING to do with a terrorist attack on Americans in a GUN FREE ZONE (sitting ducks).
If we started calling out the real problems in this country and stopped with the PC BS ("Islamaphobia"??????) we might actually be able to deal with this problem. In the meantime, just arm yourself as is your RIGHT.
The second amendment has nothing to do with the military. Is the First Amendment about GOVERNMENT free speech?
unfortunately, the people with an agenda are using this attack as cover to attack another "politically incorrect" group - gun owners. The fact that gun owners & the lgbt community aren't necessarily overtly "friendly" to each other only helps those with the agenda, though I think there's more support for the "pink pistols" in the "hetero/bubba gun-lover" community than anyone would expect. Divide & conquer works really well in this situation & your post proves that.
Well ... at least it took 6 pages before we started getting bashed with religion, howls of "politically correct" and boasts about being politically incorrect. All of which seem to be consistent precursors to being deliberately hateful and demeaning while attempting to avoid the usual consequences of being exceptionally offensive. Being accused of being politically correct is supposed to make us shut up.
Ummm ... no. Don't wanna, don't hafta, not gonna.
For that matter, it seems to me that the only posts trying to enforce "political correctness" in the first place were the ones that scolded us for being somehow "un-American" for sharing that the lgbt community has experienced this event as a hate crime and that we get to talk about that.
Sorry, not going to erase our history because it makes some people uncomfortable.
More than one poster has expressed their acceptance of and respect for viewpoints that focused on the factors of terrorism or gun access or the human tragedy of a mass murder. What the OP has asked is that the thread as a whole stay on the general topic of Orlando or relate back to it somehow.
If that's not good enough for you, then you have a problem coping with difference without feeling threatened. Excessively rigid thinking is not a good symptom. ()
This article has really frustrated me. What in the world does this have to do with NURSING? Such an "in your face" politically driven agenda in words. As a nurse, I have taken an oath that goes beyond all these politically correct agendas. I will be the first to say that the LBGT community's practice is an abomination to Gods will. But I would NEVER refuse as a Nurse or Christian to provide medical care.
Please...get back to having articles that deal with issues related to the practice of nursing and not the "push" of an agenda!
I am utterly appalled at your wording. I don't CARE if you don't like it or if you think we're an abomination! There are gay nurses here and we just lost 50 of our community! Have some respect! Who's pushing an agenda now? Wow.
Hi.........I just wanted an open honest discussion, without being labeled, but that didn't happen...oh well.....anyway what gets to me is humans committing random acts of violence, as in killing people they don't even know, not gang related, not family related, just shooting people they don't know....how that person cannot be mentally ill. I even include some of the "terrorists" in this category.
I do understand that diagnosed mentally ill people, a la DSM IV, are not a danger to the public, they harm themselves not others. I do understand not wanting the public to label or be afraid of someone having a diagnosed mental illness.....but all I could come up with in my quick Googling research is some expert admitting such people, random acts of violence, are "not mentally healthy." I think the psychiatric community needs to better label or understanding of someone who is "not mentally healthy" and maybe they could not be allowed to own guns?
I'm not against gun ownership. We own a gun. Though at times I'm not mentally healthy!!!!! I'm glad I don't carry a loaded gun with me, I'd be in prison for homicide, and not for a random act against someone I don't know!!!!
.....I just wanted an open honest discussion, without being labeled, but that didn't happen...oh well.....anyway what gets to me is humans committing random acts of violence, as in killing people they don't even know, not gang related, not family related, just shooting people they don't know....how that person cannot be mentally ill. I even include some of the "terrorists" in this category.
julie03209
1 Post
This article has really frustrated me. What in the world does this have to do with NURSING? Such an "in your face" politically driven agenda in words. As a nurse, I have taken an oath that goes beyond all these politically correct agendas. I will be the first to say that the LBGT community's practice is an abomination to Gods will. But I would NEVER refuse as a Nurse or Christian to provide medical care.
Please...get back to having articles that deal with issues related to the practice of nursing and not the "push" of an agenda!