Old Ladies Having Babies

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Nov 15, 2004

I can't even imagine being pregnant at my age, let alone if I had another decade on me!! And why ever would anyone even want to be?? I'm ready for grandchildren.....my poor old body would NOT do well if it had to nurture a new life at this point, and I would hate to put it through the postpartum depression and 2 AM feedings routine again! Plus, it would hardly be fair to give birth to a child who's going to be graduating from college at the approximate time that my sorry butt gets carried over the nursing-home threshhold.

Not for me, thank you very much. Having babies at 50+ just begs the question, "Just because it CAN be done......SHOULD it?" :uhoh21:

Still Riding · Nov 15, 2004

I agree with

"Just because it CAN be done......SHOULD it?"

it's not the older mothers i would feel sorry for but the kids. imagine the kid who's mom and father (no one ever mentioned how old these men are, which is equally wrong) who's parents are that old. they are too old to run and play, through a football...

i think there is an age where it is too old thin of it this way a 50 year old has a kid, when the kid is 20 the mom is 70, if she survives. and to be that young and possibly haveing to handle an ailing parent would be very difficult.

live4today, RN · Nov 15, 2004

i say to each her own. i had an aunt who learned she was pregnant in her early fifties (twenty years after her fourth child), and that baby girl was fine, and had many years left with her parents before they both died. :)

when i lived in southern california, there was an asian couple on the news who had a toddler....no borrowed eggs, either. it is their own genetic baby created the natural normal way, and they were in their sixties. they both looked in fantastic shape. :)

i am fifty-two, and if i could get pregnant at my age, i would. we need to get rid of the stigmatism that is only associated with women having children in their later years. if men can do it, why shouldn't the woman. it may not be right for everyone in their fifties, but it is right for some. live and let live! :) heck, we're not the ones who have to get up with the baby at night, change its' diaper, etc.

ayndim · Nov 15, 2004

I am 33 and to me I am too old for any more kids. My last pg was just too hard (and he is 14 mos). Can't imagine putting this body through it at 50+. Kids should be in college and I should be sitting on the porch with some sort of alcoholic drink in my coffee at that age. Or just a nice drink in a coffee cup so it only looks like I am drinking coffee, :rotfl:

It is different for men. At least in my house. It wouldn't matter if hubby was 80. He doesn't have to carry and birth the babe. And he still wouldn't do S$!# inside the house :uhoh3: Great financial provider but housework, kidwork no way. Only fun stuff for Daddy. I personally think women who have babies past 50 are crazy. I think I would have a meltdown if I got pg past 40 (or right now for that matter.) But to each their own.

meownsmile, BSN, RN · Nov 15, 2004

I'm not really what I consider old, but am dealing with tweens/teens right now. I loved being preg, but frankly i'll leave the late life babies to those who think they can, or do. Leave me and my bladder in peace!!!!

hmccartn · Nov 15, 2004

Why is it that we arent seeing the media show outrage at our babies having babies...you know, the 14 yr olds who come in having their first...or 18 yr olds on their 3rd....

i think the vast majority of those babes born to older mom's are desperately wanted and will be showered with love...

wish i could say the same for the later...

seems like our societies energy is focused in the wrong direction....

SmilingBluEyes · Nov 15, 2004

Why is it that we arent seeing the media show outrage at our babies having babies...you know, the 14 yr olds who come in having their first...or 18 yr olds on their 3rd....
i think the vast majority of those babes born to older mom's are desperately wanted and will be showered with love...
wish i could say the same for the later...
seems like our societies energy is focused in the wrong direction....

Indeed!

:idea:

smk1, LPN · Nov 15, 2004

i guess my issue would be that the kids of those 50-60 yr old will have an 80 yr old parent to take care of when they graduate high school. I know that my 20's (i just turned 28) have been a wondeerful exciting scary an sometimes stressful journey and i don't know what i would have done without my parents and family. financially im no in a position to take care of a parent fully if need be and my daughter loves that her grandma and papa can run and play with her still. THis is why it wouldn't be my choice.

VizslaMom · Nov 15, 2004

i guess my issue would be that the kids of those 50-60 yr old will have an 80 yr old parent to take care of when they graduate high school. I know that my 20's (i just turned 28) have been a wondeerful exciting scary an sometimes stressful journey and i don't know what i would have done without my parents and family. financially im no in a position to take care of a parent fully if need be and my daughter loves that her grandma and papa can run and play with her still. THis is why it wouldn't be my choice.

I've seen many a teenager/twenty-something taking care of their parents who are in severely ill health in their 40's and 50's. These "younger" parents LOOK like they are in their 80's and 90's already, either due to abusing their own bodies or unfortunate unavoidable chronic illness.

Parents are like a box 'o chocolates: Ya never know what you're gonna get.

...and you deal with the cards you are dealt.

More power to the gal who just had her twins in New York.

I'm 31 and haven't had any yet...although we've been trying for two years.

allnurses Guide · Nov 15, 2004

As most of you know, I had an unplanned pregnancy at 43 and adore my 3 year old but for awhile there my husband and I were pretty scared. I had the same thoughts Marla wrote about. How could I do this again?

Well, you just do it. It has all turned out well. We have a great and loving and very funny 3 year old son. Our other kids are 21, 19 and 15.

My father-in-law and mother-in-law watch him the two days I work. My mil is 76 and has a huge flower garden that she takes care of herself and my son loves to help; she also can's all her own veggies and fruits, cleans her own house, walks every day, volunteers at our local hospital, helps out at church with the little kids and chases my son around. My fil is 81 and is also very active in gardening, working at the church with the landscaping and mowing, giving his grandson tractor rides, etc. . ...

I don't think we can make blanket statements.

steph

obeyacts2 · Nov 15, 2004

Well, What an appropriate topic!!! I agree with the poster that said we should very well be worried about the young ill-equipped girls having babies. rather than the offspring of older couples who generally wanted and well provided for (once the shock wears off) :rotfl: I can think of two such cases around here, one was a late 40s lady who remarried after having children young and was a grandma, Surprise! A honeymoon baby. She went to the OB and was like "I cant believe we are having this conversation" He told her "oh I see them your age all the time". The other was a couple from church: Dh was years past vas and both girls out of high school, both greyheaded, midlife surprise.

The flip side is this: the sandwich generation. I am in my 30s, fighting the IF battle, and now we have the news from the Doc that my mother d/t her health issues may not be able to live alone any longer. Either she goes to LTC or stays with me. So, I may be dealing with an infant and elderly parent all at once!!!!

Laura