nurse & dr affair, what should I do? - page 3
Just found out that one of our nurses (divorced w/ kids) is having an affair w/ a married doc. it is disguishing! what would you do if you were me? I think it is totally unethical to have a work... Read More
Nov 10, '06Joined: May '05; Posts: 943; Likes: 28It is true that this kind of behavior happens in just about all work places. It is going on now at mine and has several times in the past. I just act as if I do not know anything about it.
Nov 10, '06Occupation: PICU Joined: Aug '05; Posts: 55; Likes: 2You need to mind your own business.
Unless it is you are jealous of her relationship, are you secretly upset that he is not having an affair with you?
Just kidding. :kiss
Nov 10, '06Specialty: med/surg, telemetry, IV therapy, mgmt ; Joined: May '05; Posts: 15,027; Likes: 8,983Quote from sandeeIf I were as disguished as you, I would quit. It's too bad that people are insensitive and make a work situation difficult by pulling a stunt like this. :angryfire Hope you find a better job soon where everyone minds their own business and keeps their affairs to themself.Just found out that one of our nurses (divorced w/ kids) is having an affair w/ a married doc. it is disguishing! what would you do if you were me?
I think it is totally unethical to have a work place affair, it just makes me sick to even have to work with these people.
Please help and explain to me why people are doing unprofessional things like that?:uhoh21:
Nov 10, '06Occupation: Operating Room Nurse Specialty: 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER ; From: US ; Joined: Jun '03; Posts: 17,036; Likes: 1,008If it's happening in front of me (i.e. touching, the pt. notices, etc.), then it became my problem. Till then, it's not my business.
Nov 10, '06Occupation: RN Specialty: 10 year(s) of experience in ICU,ER ; Joined: Jul '03; Posts: 614; Likes: 299I have said this before in simular threads...
Fate always has a way of biting these people in the butts.
Nov 10, '06Occupation: ER Nurse - Pedi and Adult Specialty: 6 year(s) of experience in Tele, ICU, ER ; From: US ; Joined: Aug '06; Posts: 502; Likes: 96Have to agree with most folks - stay OUT of it. Now if she's bragging your face, you might want to say "You know, this really isn't anything I want to know about, M'kay?" and go back to your work.
If patients are noticing and making comments about behavior, you can always say, (straight face) to her, "it's so funny, Patient XXX thought it was sweet that two *married* people get to work together - can you imagine?" <eyeroll>and back to work. Ok so I have a sarcastic italian mouth, but if the patients are noticing, I'd give a gentle heads up to the nurse and then leave it alone.
Nov 10, '06Joined: Dec '05; Posts: 1,375; Likes: 248best advice I could give is stay AWAy from this! I would not even speak of it as that is just adding to the gossip.
This behavior goes on at many workplaces across the country so leaving is out.
Maybe someone closer can have a little conversation with the nurse or doc about discretion and that everyone knows? That has a way of putting a damper on these things!
Nov 10, '06Occupation: RN Specialty: 20 year(s) of experience in ICU, PICC Nurse, Nursing Supervisor ; From: TX, US ; Joined: Apr '04; Posts: 5,001; Likes: 1,902It sounds like you have a little more than a personal problem with this. If I were you I would stay of of these peoples buisness. You dont know all the circumstances and if these people have any pull whatsoever , you could find yourself without a job if you metal....
Nov 10, '06Occupation: Medical Imaging RN~Special Procedures CT Specialty: 33 year(s) of experience in OB, M/S, HH, Medical Imaging RN ; Joined: Aug '04; Posts: 6,708; Likes: 1,449M.Y.O.B......they think it's all fun and games now but in the end they will be the ones paying for their sins. What goes around...comes around.
If she's bragging to you tell her "I really don't want to hear this" and walk off. She'll get the message.
Chances are very good that administration is already aware of the situation. Gossip spreads fast.
Nov 10, '06Occupation: CRNP Specialty: Tele, Home Health, MICU, CTICU, LTC ; Joined: Aug '03; Posts: 515; Likes: 95Quote from sandeeWow, if this minor incident (in my mind) is making you think this then how do you feel about all the other things such as war. It is none of your business what these people are doing. I say...stay out of it.I am now thinking to myself, "what's wrong with this world?"
Nov 10, '06Occupation: full-time student Specialty: Looking for a career in NICU ; Joined: Oct '06; Posts: 1,020; Likes: 82What they do in their personal life, that is between two consenting adults, is no one else's business.
You don't know what is going on at home with either of their marriages.
If you hear the nurse trying to tell you of her latest conquests, I would nip it in the bud, say, "I think you are an excellent nurse and I enjoy working with you, however, my personal morals do not allow me to condone adultery, and I will be willing to discuss anything with you except for that."
I think that would shut her up. From a personnel level, she is putting the Doctor at risk by running her mouth b/c if the relationship goes sour, God forbid if she starts screaming sexual harrassment.
I had a male friend once that from outward appearances, they appeared to have the perfect marriage. When he started dating this other woman it looked like he was stepping out on his sweet wife. When he moved out, it looked like he was cheating on his wife and everyone was like, "Poor Cheryl".
What no one but his parents and two close friends knew was that he had already filed for a divorce because his wife was advertising for sex on the internet, meeting men in hotels for sex, and he had only lived with her for a few extra months to get his finances in order before he formally moved out.
But if you didn't know this, it looked bad. But his wife was a s**t and got what she deserved.
Just goes to show, you NEVER know.Last edit by BSNtobe2009 on Nov 10, '06
Nov 10, '06Joined: Apr '04; Posts: 666; Likes: 240Have you ever been in love? Unfortunately you can't pick who you fall in love with. People don't just wake up one morning and say "Gee, I think I'll start an affair today". It usually just gradually happens before you know it.
Although it does sound like she could be a little more discreet since he is married. If it's not meant to be it'll blow up in their faces soon enough, until then I agree with the other posters, mind your own business.:stone
Nov 10, '06Occupation: MICU/SICU Specialty: CCRN, TNCC SRNA ; Joined: Jan '06; Posts: 133; Likes: 13It truely is wrong and I can see where it makes you sick. I recently had a similar situation at my place of emplyment, but as everyone said, stay out of it.