Not a Nursing Question, but Has to Do with Work, So...

KelRN215, BSN, RN · Mar 23, 2015

I tend to be a pushover for things like this. It is hard for me to say 'No' to something simply because I do not want to do it. I know that Kim has had a falling out with one of the people who took her home most often. That person is simply no longer willing to do it. I would like to find a way to keep the friendship and working relationship without having to play taxi. We are a small facility, so no matter what, we are all stuck working together.
For those that have asked, there is simply NO public transportation other than the van that take the elderly to the clinic or the grocery store. It is run and funded by the senior center and they do have age requirements for it. They also don't run until 8:00 AM, so that won't benefit us at 6:00 AM even if they helped someone who is younger.

It's still not your problem that these women don't have cars. One of them is only going 2 blocks from the hospital. She can walk. Honestly the other one only lives 3 miles away, she can walk too. I walked three miles to/from work many times when I worked in the hospital. Sometimes by choice/because it was faster to walk than to wait for public transportation when our beloved Red Sox were playing at home, other times because it was snowing and there was no chance I'd see a functioning train for hours. They're adults. It's their responsibility to get themselves to/from work. Paint your car, get a new license plate and start parking elsewhere.

KelRN215, BSN, RN · Mar 23, 2015

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Well, I make no claim to be fully aware of U.S. insurance norms, but presumably to have health insurance through her employer, she needs to be employed, right? And if she becomes gravely sick, she won't be working, right? Therefore she will fall back on the system, meaning everyone else pays, right?

Not exactly. She'd qualify for FMLA leave for 12 weeks and would retain her benefits. If she did end up out of work, she'd have to pay for insurance through COBRA. Losing one's job doesn't automatically qualify one for Medicaid.

Libby1987 · Mar 23, 2015

I would give them notice since they've been enabled this whole time. Maybe end of Friday shift (or whenever you will have days off) you can tell them that they will need to find another ride.

joanna73, BSN, RN · Mar 23, 2015

Tell those co-workers exactly as you posted here: "I'm tired and I need to get home." The end.

If they don't like it, tough. You are not obligated, especially when it's clear they are taking advantage. Just say no and don't even worry about it.

BuckyBadgerRN, ASN, RN · Mar 23, 2015

Amy can walk for two blocks. Kim can pound sand for 3 miles.

Red Kryptonite · Mar 23, 2015

You said that she works as an LPN, so presumably she has health insurance, right? Why would "everyone" have to pay for her medical care?

Do you not know what coinsurance means? The insurance only pays part of the cost, and you pay the rest. When you're talking about cancer treatment, even 20% is going to be a ton of money. Are you under some impression that health insurance pays 100% of the cost of all health care?

lovinglife2015 · Mar 23, 2015

Do you not know what coinsurance means? The insurance only pays part of the cost, and you pay the rest. When you're talking about cancer treatment, even 20% is going to be a ton of money. Are you under some impression that health insurance pays 100% of the cost of all health care?

Exactly and the insured person would be liable for their own copay percentage, not "everyone" else.

MPKH, BSN, RN · Mar 23, 2015

Tell them that you are unable to provide rides for them. No explanation or excuse needed. Say no and leave it at that. If they wait for you at your car and refuses to leave until you give them a ride, then call security or the police on them.

Or you can start charging them a fee for the rides. Even though they live close to the hospital, every ride you give them use up some of your gas. And gas costs money, no matter how short the trip. And if you're giving them rides on a regular basis, it will add up real fast.

Mr. Murse · Mar 23, 2015

Sounds like you guys have some major issues with defining boundaries and sticking to them. You are getting walked all over and insulted to boot.

Quit giving those ungrateful, entitled, egomaniacs rides and who cares if they get upset about it. Explain if you want, or don't. Is your life really going to be much worse if you don't have to take those two leeches home all the time?

If you're truly unable to put your foot down, or if you just have enough compassion for some reason that you want to keep helping them out, then at least stand up for yourself. This is a very important skill to develop in life, ESPECIALLY as a nurse as we will be manipulated by coworkers, management, and patients on a regular basis. Learn to set boundaries and stick with them.

ThePrincessBride, MSN, RN, NP · Mar 23, 2015

I work with two CNAs that don't drive. One (Amy) simply doesn't have a license due to a mental/physical disability since birth. The other (Kim) has a license and a car, but the car is broken down and she can't afford the repairs. Both expect a ride home from coworkers every day.
Amy often goes to a friend's house instead of to her home. Her friend's house is literally two blocks from the facility where we work. She has never even asked me for a ride, she simply waits by my car and gets in when I unlock the doors. Kim lives about three miles away and used to ask for a ride, but now she simply tells me she will be waiting for me. They do the same thing to other coworkers who drive.
It isn't a big deal because it only takes about ten or fifteen minutes to get them both home. I don't think that any of us spend much extra money on gas. I think there is just some frustration with being expected to deliver them to wherever they need to go. Neither has ever offered to pitch in for gas.
Kim is a single mom who leaves her children with her mother while she works. A few days ago, Kim's mother called her while we were on our way to her house. She was concerned because Kim wasn't home yet. I only heard one side of the conversation, but Kim made the comment to her mother, "The nurse who is taking me home didn't manage to get out on time. She really needs to be more considerate of the fact that I have obligations at home." It was a long and lousy night. I was tempted to pull over and tell her to get out (not that I ever would, but it certainly annoyed me).
All of us who take them home have similar issues. We are just seeking some advice on how we can reduce our frustration about this. One of the CNAs that gives them rides has said she is going to start charging them fifty cents every time she gives them a ride.
Also one day when someone was dropping Amy off, her car died in the parking lot of Amy's apartment complex. She ended up having to call her husband to get it moved and eventually restarted. Amy told her that her car is a piece of junk and that she got in trouble with her landlord for having a friend's car in the lot overnight. She said that from now on Amy and Kim can just walk.

:***:

My jaw literally dropped as I was reading this post. Are you serious?

You must be nicer than me because the minute they stepped into my car without even so much as asking me, I would have been "what the hell are you doing?" You don't just get into someone's car without asking for a ride. And this whole "we'll be waiting for you" business...the heck?!?

I can't believe someone would have the audacity to behave this way. Next time they start demanding or trying to "steal" a ride, I would tell them "I am not a chauffeur. Catch a cab." And refuse rides from now on.

Freeloaders make me sick!

Libby1987 · Mar 23, 2015

One of them has "mental/physical disability from birth", how manipulative and entitled can she be?

I don't think you need to provide employee transportation but this seems to have been something that has been customary at your work. How did that happen?

Ruby Vee, BSN · Mar 23, 2015

Haha, I know right. GenX here. I don't know what's wrong with this current generation, but they seem to be lacking a spine.
"I'm sorry, but I can not take you home today(this week, this month, this year, etc...)." End of story, no further explanation necessary. What would you say if they asked you to help them bury a body? Would you just go along with that too?

Boomer here -- and we don't -- or at least I don't -- know which generation the OP belongs to, but this isn't a generational problem. At least, not the generation of the poster being taken advantage of. There are plenty of folks from every generation who allow themselves to be taken advantage of. And this is what is going on here -- the OP has allowed these two to take advantage of her from the get go. One ride is one thing. A ride two blocks when it's raining cats and dogs a couple of times a year is another thing. A daily ride for two weeks while the car is in the shop (I admit, I'm very glad that I had a co-worker two blocks away who was willing to help me out when we worked the same shift) is yet another thing. But this has been going on for awhile now, and the poster is finally wondering what to do to put a stop to it. Not a generational thing, but perhaps a personality thing.