So how do you deal with significant others on opposite shifts? I feel like my boyfriend doesn't get that I need my sleep. That he doesn't get my job isn't some mindless job that I push buttons.
we had a major fight two months ago when I was forced to sleep in our camper because he had his family coming over. Keep in mind I opted to pick up basically close to 200 hours of overtime in several weeks to help us get some extra cash so I was already stressed. He told his brother in law it's okay to mow the lawn so I was woken up. I wouldn't have been pissed if it was a neighbor but I was pissed at my boyfriend. He said I was rude and should apologize. I refused.
Now he offered to pay for a hotel room this weekend but then he changed his tune to they were only doing work Saturday (a day I didn't work). yesterday he springs it on me they were doing work all weekend including yesterday and tomorrow. He didn't work yesterday till after I left. I'm pissed about this. He knows I work Sunday. He claims he told me and he did. But then he changed it to just saturday. They didn't work friday till after I left because I threw a fit.
Am I being selfish in wanting to sleep well before working in an ER? That I may kill someone if I'm tired. I can have 5 or more patients with little or no ancillary staff. I could be triaging that night. He makes it sound like I am very selfish in my requests. Yes they are doing us a favor but it isn't like I am doing a job where I push buttons or stock shelves
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
To the OP: ( I am not addressing other silly posts here)------I don't care if you are hauling trash or sitting on a computer all night. YOU WORK NIGHTS and need your sleep. If he can't respect that, he is NOT a keeper. Cut bait and run.
OP, I feel like your boyfriend is being extremely disrespectful of your career and your health! If he didn't get it together after a serious conversation and fast, this would be a dealbreaker for me. Compromise is a beautiful thing, as is prioritizing each other's well being, and it's hard to have a solid relationship where neither of those things plays a role.
NOADLS-"Couples from the middle east could move over here and import their barbaric traditions".
Are you serious with that racist remark? Are you a practicing nurse? God forbid you ever get a Middle Eastern patient. Have you watched the news lately? You have some pretty sickening things happening right here in the good ol' US of A.
I am surprised an Admin hasn't jumped in to remind certain people to leave their ignorant comments to themselves.
NOADLS-"Couples from the middle east could move over here and import their barbaric traditions".
Are you serious with that racist remark? Are you a practicing nurse? God forbid you ever get a Middle Eastern patient. Have you watched the news lately? You have some pretty sickening things happening right here in the good ol' US of A.
I am surprised an Admin hasn't jumped in to remind certain people to leave their ignorant comments to themselves.
You are right. By a new poster this comment wouldn't be tolerated. NOADLS is a rebel, I guess so much so that no one really reacts when he says something irreverent.
Thanks for all the replies! I am reconsidering some options with him. I was going to make him shell out for a hotel but my family member offered me a house for a day to sleep in. One thing that also bugs me is that at one point, he opted to go mudding/play in the river instead of working on the house one or two months ago. I wasn't thrilled when they said that.
Oh and his response to me another time? "People can die at my job too." Um, okay? I am not waking you up at 3 am to clean the house. Although we'll see when the pager gets here (there is some debate about what pager it'll be. Right now it is just a cellphone paging because they are buying new ones).
Seriously? I don't understand why a loving boyfriend would sooner let you sleep in another house or spend money on a hotel, when he could just be a decent partner and let you sleep! I'm sorry, but I think it's pretty unfortunate that you may need to resort to 3 am chores and waking him up with your pages to get him to understand your situation. Really, he shouldn't have to empathize to *that* degree to know that you have a (reasonable!) need that he should make an effort to meet. I know I don't know your relationship or the more positive things about him, but this post alone already makes me upset on your behalf.
SmilingBluEyes
20,964 Posts
To the OP: ( I am not addressing other silly posts here)------I don't care if you are hauling trash or sitting on a computer all night. YOU WORK NIGHTS and need your sleep. If he can't respect that, he is NOT a keeper. Cut bait and run.