:crying2:I am so sad, my sister is dying. don't want advice, just needed to tell someone who would understand. I couldn't make myself go, the nurse part of me knows exactly what they are doing. The sister side of me wants to say, noooooooooo. My wonderful, caring, supportive sister. The one I always went to when things didn't make sence. She hasn't spoken a word in 2 weeks. My heart is breaking. I've helped so many people over the years. Why can't I help her. I couldn't bare to be there when they shut off the vent, when they give her the morphine. Why didn't I have the strength to go hold her hand and tell her it's ok to go. I've done it for patients, why couldn't I do it for her? Sorry if I have babled, my heart is breaking. I am sitting here waiting for my brother in law to call and tell me it's over. I've wanted to tell all of you for a while now, but couldn't make myself type the words. I knew what was coming the first night, after they told me she coded and she was without oxygen for over 5 minutes, I knew what had happened. Thanks for reading, I can't see the keys from the tears. God Bless you all:redpinkhe
May God bless and comfort you and yours during this sorrowful time. Your sis knows you love her, and I think she undertands how hard this is on you. There's no words I can say except I am so sorry.:icon_hug:
I understand how you feel. I couldn't make myself go in to see my father in the CCU before they took him off life support. I just couldn't handle it. Even at the funeral I couldn't look at him.
Later, I told my sister-in-law I didn't want to see him because I'd rather remember him like he was. She told me she wishes she had done the same because the image of him in his casket kept haunting her.
Don't feel bad about how you deal with grief. We all do the best we can when it comes to that.
I am so sorry for what you're going through. Please believe that your sister knows how much you love her. I wish you and your family comfort and peace:icon_hug:.
Specializes in CNA, Surgical, Pediatrics, SDS, ER.
I am so sorry to hear about your sister. Don't beat yourself up over not being there. You are a sister first and foremost, she knows you are with her and she will always be with you even in passing. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.:redbeathe
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Don't beat yourself up over not being there. You are a sister first and foremost, she knows you are with her and she will always be with you even in passing. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.:redbeathe
Nicky30, BSN, RN
125 Posts
It's not enough but I am so very sorry too.
Please do not beat yourself up for not physically being there, your sister will know that you were there in spirit for every single breath.
Hugs and prayers to you and your family, this must be very hard on all of you.
Nicky.:redpinkhe