Most depressed I've ever been during nursing school

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Hey all,

I'm just a few weeks away from graduating from my accelerated nursing program. I've done well in classes and feel capable of doing well on the NCLEX, however, I feel that I'm the most depressed I've ever been. I dread going to my senior practicum (my preceptor has been amazing, the staff is very supportive) but I feel like throwing up before every shift. I feel that nursing (at least the type I've been exposed to) is something I could be good at but is not fulfilling, does not motivate me to come back, and does not make me happy.

With graduation approaching, I'm becoming even more concerned because I need to apply for jobs/pass nclex and I don't even know if I'm going to like what I'm doing. I realize a lot of this depression may stem from the fact that I haven't seen my family in six months, I don't have many close friends here, and I'm in a lot of debt... but those aside, I still feel very unhappy and incompetent. Is this normal, and if so, what have you guys done that helps?

I also feel trapped because I have to work for several years regardless to pay off my loans. Ahhh!

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I think that most of us, if not all, have days like this. Just remember, you went into this for a reason. I know sometimes it's hard to remember what that reason is when you get depressed, but I know the reason is still there. I'm sure that once you are done, you will be able to relax a lot more and focus your energy back on your family. Nurses are known for being compassionate, but who is there to help us when we need some compassion? I've learned that we really have to be there for each other, because people on the "outside" can't fully understand what we are going through. I've had days that made me want to scream, but I got through them. This site is invaluable as far as support goes. Yes, you may find the occasional butt-head here, but it's generally more of a positive place for us to vent, get help, etc. If you ever need to talk, there are plenty of us who would listen. I think you already took a good first step by posting your concerns.

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Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

This sis the second time you have mentioned this in recent weeks. Please see your PCP of the health services on your campus...it may be more than just missing your family.

40k..while it seems like a lot I know that these days it is pretty average...unfortunately. Have you spoke to your family about missing them?

You ae close to graduation....it is common to feel like this....if you find bedside nursing isn't for you it isn't a big deal. You can look into pharmaceutical rep. Clinical reps at medical device companies. THere is a ton of non nursing jobs out there....((HUGS))

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Specializes in Clinical Research, Outpt Women's Health.

You do not have to work in a hospital. I never did after graduating as a nurse. There are many other things in nursing you can do that may not make you feel like that.

That said, many jobs suck. Yep. Sometimes you have to endure some crummy ones to get financial security and then you will really appreciate the better ones. If it was all roses and puppies they wouldn't pay mcuh:***:

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There is something about finishing anything big- whether an accomplishment or failure. For four years, school is our life. When it's done, it's the end of an experience. Not unlike a death in some ways. I know that may sound odd, but I think that can bring anyone down. I have felt "off" this last month. I have been doing schoolwork and clinicals for 18 months straight. The day I finished clinical, I had that feeling of "now what?". Try to focus on the future and what you have achieved, but it's okay to take time to adjust to a big change in routine :). The future is yours with your degree! Hugs.

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Specializes in Critical Care, Education.

Ah yes, I call it "The Peggy Lee syndrome"..... oldie songstress with a famous tune called "

?" about the depression and sadness when things don't meet expectations or work out the way you want them to. As an optimist, I have found that there were very few things in life that lived up to my expectations. Maybe it's different for pessimists. I have a psychologist friend who says that this is at the root of a lot of reactive depressive episodes, including post-natal depression (what is this creature? where is that adorable, cuddly sweet baby that I envisioned?)

If you feel that you're beginning to decompensate - unable to function as you need to - please seek assistance from a qualified professional. I just want to reassure you that this too shall pass. It always does.

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Specializes in Forensic Psych.

I was horribly depressed during my last semester of nursing school. Everyone was worried about me. Wouldn't come to class, barely studying, calling in to work. I was leaving my life for the past few years and all the friends I'd made and moving on to....what?

I had no idea. I still don't really know.

Part of the problem was that I was looking around at the hospital where I worked (I was a tech and a unit secretary) and knew I did NOT want to do what they were doing. I was looking around at the hospital where I did clinicals and knee I did NOT want to do what they were doing.

But something about NS makes you feel like you have to or you aren't doing it right, or as well as you could be. I wasn't even sure I wanted to be a nurse.

But I graduated, got a job, and I'm plunging ahead. I know I'll find my place somewhere up ahead. Just wish I knew where!

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Specializes in None yet..

Just as oh-so-wise Esme12 said, see your PCP ASAP. (After my father died, when I finally dragged myself in to see mine, he said, "Once you start taking antidepressants, the only thing you'll regret is that you waited so long to start." He was right. Not that you'll need them, but if you do, you only harm yourself by waiting.)

AND... read this book immediately: The Happiness Advantage: The Seven Principles of Positive Psychology That Fuel Success and Performance at Work by Shawn Achor copyright 2012. And/or, watch his video at

or go to his website at Goodthink Inc. | Shawn Achor. We do so much harm to ourselves and others with the ways we use our minds (bad news) but we can learn better ways (good news).

Hope you are on an upswing soon. Life is too short to feel like throwing up before every shift!

:flwrhrts:

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Specializes in Med-Surg, NICU.

Have you talked to a doctor about depression? I know we aren't supposed to give medical advice, but as someone who has suffered from depression (and take medications) your post resonates with me.

I think that nursing school is far different from actual nursing. Many nurses who HATED school ended up LOVING being on their own. I think, right now, it is too premature to say that you do like nursing or don't find any aspect of it fulfilling (for you personally) because there are SO many different kinds of nursing out there. I know I would be miserable doing hospice or oncology, but I KNOW that I will love working in the neonatal ICU. It may be that you yourself haven't found something that you are passionate about in nursing, so at least talk to a doc and give nursing a try. You've invested too much not to.

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

Just one more oldster here wishing you the best! It's very common to feel overwhelmed by everything going on as graduation approaches and you realize this nursing thing is about to get very real. Some get a mild case of the jitters and some need outside support, as mentioned by others. Remember that you can only control the present and take things in steps no matter how enormous the challenges seem to be.

HouTx - "Peggy Lee Syndrome" ---- I love that!

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I appreciate all of your concerns. I really have no interest in discussing my well-being with the PCP's on campus as we're already acquainted and I don't feel comfortable talking with them. I'm just wondering if you guys live for your days off as much as the people on my floor do and if it's normal for new grads to feel like puking before coming to work.

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I appreciate all of your concerns. I really have no interest in discussing my well-being with the PCP's on campus as we're already acquainted and I don't feel comfortable talking with them. I'm just wondering if you guys live for your days off as much as the people on my floor do and if it's normal for new grads to feel like puking before coming to work.
I know exactly how you feel. If I were you, I'd keep on pushing ahead, and then graduate nursing school with the intention of becoming an NP or CRNA as quickly as you can become one. These guys just seem SO much happier... they make more money, they have better and more flexible schedules, they don't deal with much "grunt" work, and there are so many interesting settings they can work in (not just hospitals). For example, you could work as an NP for a home health agency and get paid on a "per patient" basis to perform basic assessments/check-ups on patients in their homes, or you could even work in a cosmetic/plastic surgeon's office and be involved with entirely elective procedures. The hospital sucks, though (IMO).
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