MD Quote of the Week

Doctor: "Well, she must be bleeding somewhere! Is she bleeding somewhere?"

Me: "She has gross hematuria."

Doctor: "No, no, no, I mean, is she bleeding anywhere. Like a GI bleed, or a brain bleed?"

Well, Doctor, let me get out my CT scan glasses and find a radiologist to go kidnap. So sorry for misunderstanding your question.

[classicdame, MSN, EdD]

from cardiologist: "I don't know anything about insulin. I just work on the heart".

from office nurse: "How do you spell lisinopril?"

[casi, ASN, RN]

Doctor on the phone with a nurse on another floor who is calling about a patient with chest pain. Patient tells the nurse to hold on and turns to one of my floor nurses "So if you had a patient with chest pain and a low BP what would you give them?"

Call from MD to nurse at SNF:

Hey! I'm just sitting here trying to fill out this guy's death certificate. What was the cause of death on this one anyway?

[tyvin, BSN, RN]

I don't get it; docs depend on us for information and suggestions. What's wrong with it? I just don't get why this post is trying to make docs look dumb.

In all the posts on this thread, the docs were asking a nurse for information that the nurse (IMO) should have been able to provide. We must be able to get along with each other. Having suggestion and solutions available is part of the relationship that we share IMO. Many times we are the eyes and ears for the docs; if they trust a nurse enough to want an opinion about what's best for a patient............how is that wrong?

I realize there are some real A holes out there but the same applies to nursing. We shouldn't let a few ruin the delicate, vital relationship that we share with each other.

seen in MD's notes, on a male pt.

" He has had a hysterectomy"

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

i don't get it; docs depend on us for information and suggestions. what's wrong with it? i just don't get why this post is trying to make docs look dumb.

in all the posts on this thread, the docs were asking a nurse for information that the nurse (imo) should have been able to provide. we must be able to get along with each other. having suggestion and solutions available is part of the relationship that we share imo. many times we are the eyes and ears for the docs; if they trust a nurse enough to want an opinion about what's best for a patient............how is that wrong?

i realize there are some real a holes out there but the same applies to nursing. we shouldn't let a few ruin the delicate, vital relationship that we share with each other.

lighten up -- i think it's supposed to be a humor thread.

my quote of the week: "sure, i'll order whatever you want. but you have to show me how to work this thing." (computer order entry.) or, "you mean *i* have to fill out the death certificate? i've never done that before." (attending that was an intern where/when i started nursing 34 years ago.)

//lighten up -- i think it's supposed to be a humor thread.//

that's fine as long as you have the same attitude when you overhear some docs discussing the "rn quote of the day".

[OutlawNurse86, BSN, RN]

Dr where I work-- Do what you gotta do, but don't get caught.

[talaxandra]

that's fine as long as you have the same attitude when you overhear some docs discussing the "rn quote of the day".

in some cases i'd chime in with my own examples. fortunately, most of the staff i work with don't read criticism of or joking about one person or incident as a damning indictment of the whole group. so, in the same way that i can respect the majority of physicians and nurses i work with while still thinking some are idiots (or just have a momentary lapse in cognition), i can tell a 'stupid nurse/stupid doctor/stupid ah' story without it ruining our delicate relationship.

Doc to me (after a heated discussion) "What charm school did you go to? Cause I certainly wouldn't want to send my daughter there." Yes, really happened!

[Cat_RN, ASN, BSN, RN]

Haha, I have one.. this doc is renown for his 'absent-mindedness'. I called at 2am for a patient out of control.. Sudden aggression and AMS, NOT the norm for this guy as he was usually more than receptive to nursing and assessing him. This man, who was normally W/C bound, was attempting to go up and down the halls stumbling around with his IV yanking out of his arm, wouldn't let me get near him to even check his o2 sat or BP. Screaming and yelling and trying to hit.. I could not TOUCH the guy. I called the doc.. explained the situation about the pt's sudden change in mental status and flailing/unstable behavior in the hall way and he says to me "Um, I don't know what to do'. I'm like.. well this man is at this very moment at the end of his IV tubing trying to walk down the hall, going to fall on his head... I need SOMETHING!! I'm thinking it's neuro and possibly life threatening, so I told him I'm calling 911 so he can be eval'd in the ER. Doc says 'Yea, I guess that's a good idea, do that." THANK YOU!

Anyways, when EMS came, they couldn't get the guy to consent to go, had to call police and took 8 men to hold him down to sedate him and get him outa there. He punched the sheriff in the face, bit the paramedics, kicked screamed, swore...

And guess what his dx was?

AMBIEN PSYCHOSIS.. He had been taking Ambien for at least 5 years prior, NOT a new med for him!...

It was funny because I jokingly said to the medic 'I wonder if it was the Ambien he got at 1o'.. totally didn't think it would have been that.

He actually told one of the nurse's to that went to visit him afterwards to apologize to me for creating such a ruckus. LOL.

[Cat_RN, ASN, BSN, RN]

I do really appreciate when doctor's ask you what you think the patient needs. I always hate a doc who totally ignores what a nurse suggests.. unless it's totally not appropriate for the pt. I had a pt showing obvious s/s sepsis from unknown cause.. doc ignored my 3 calls to get labs and cultures despite my saying 'he looks septic'! I of course got DON involved from then on with this man as I was totally not comfortable with the situation... Ultimately DID get the labs and the pt WAS septic... although his outcome was not good at that point, sadly.

I had a patient who the docs were looking to discharge. The resident says to me and another nurse standing there,"Just check and make sure she can urinate before you take out the foleys" --me and the other nurse look at each other as the MD was walking away and start to laugh hysterically. I said to the other nurse...."Um.....check BEFORE? How the hell does one urinate with a foley in?--did she just say what I think she did?" The nurse (nurse leader) says back to me, "I know I have a horrible cold so maybe I am not hearing right but did she also say FOLIES? how many does she think are in there?" LOL

We laughed about that one for a while! I know the doc was probably exhausted and hope she just mispoke and didn't really think you can pee with a foley in or that a person may have in multiple folies! lol

[Lucky0220]

i don't get it; docs depend on us for information and suggestions. what's wrong with it? i just don't get why this post is trying to make docs look dumb.

in all the posts on this thread, the docs were asking a nurse for information that the nurse (imo) should have been able to provide. we must be able to get along with each other. having suggestion and solutions available is part of the relationship that we share imo. many times we are the eyes and ears for the docs; if they trust a nurse enough to want an opinion about what's best for a patient............how is that wrong?

i realize there are some real a holes out there but the same applies to nursing. we shouldn't let a few ruin the delicate, vital relationship that we share with each other.

to tyvin and cabanaboy, i can tell you that as far as "docs discussing the rn quote of the day", they usually do discuss it....quite loudly, right in front of the nurse and anyone else who may be around. i can guarantee that there is at least one doctor in every hospital, who will make any nurse feel miserable, (by yelling, sarcasm, or any other response) for asking a question that the doc thinks is ignorant, or doesn't have the answer to a question the doc asks, in less than three seconds.

this was just a light hearted thread started by the op. we, as nurses, usually cannot just go off on the doctor because he asks a stupid question.

[Gluteus Maximus]

"I am too drunk to come in and see this patient." At least the physician was honest, but he was on call.

I don't get it; docs depend on us for information and suggestions. What's wrong with it? I just don't get why this post is trying to make docs look dumb.

In all the posts on this thread, the docs were asking a nurse for information that the nurse (IMO) should have been able to provide. We must be able to get along with each other. Having suggestion and solutions available is part of the relationship that we share IMO. Many times we are the eyes and ears for the docs; if they trust a nurse enough to want an opinion about what's best for a patient............how is that wrong?

I realize there are some real A holes out there but the same applies to nursing. We shouldn't let a few ruin the delicate, vital relationship that we share with each other.

I think nurses resent having to be their secretaries or gophers - like the cause of death one. Doctors get paid so much more money, have more respect, etc.

But the one who doesn't know how to deal with chest pain - well, that's just plain darned scary. I was hoping to read that he was just kidding!