Kids say the darndest things...

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Specializes in ED, School Nurse.

I see a special needs high school student multiple time a day for a chronic medical condition. We joke around with each other a lot. He was getting revved up over something the other day and I told him, "Cool your jets, dude!" He giggled and told me "Yeah, I don't want to get my nickles in a twist."

Any others?

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Specializes in kids.

Not a HS kid, but when I was in nursing school, a friend of my husband (who had an issue with alcohol, and was probably developmentally about 16 or 17), lost the keys to the small Coast Guard boat...he dropped them off the dock into the water on an early Sat AM after a rough night out.

He turned to the duty officer and said (with complete sincerity) "I plead temporary insanitary!"

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Specializes in school nursing, ortho, trauma.

I just had a good one: Kindergartener just came in with his eye clamped tightly shut - I pulled out a piece of gauze and told the student that I would help him wipe out his eye with a little eye wash and gauze to which he replies: What's gauze? Is it spicy?

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What's gauze? Is it spicy?

Ha! My 3 year old grandson calls the color red "spicy".

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Flare, when the little kids come in to see me like that, (one eye all scrunched up) I like to say "WHAT? Is it pirate day again??? Nobody told me!!"

:cheeky:

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First grader:

"My itchy girly bits are better now. Mommy put me in a spitz bath."

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Specializes in School Nurse.

My favorite is when a parent called and said her son said I put gasoline on him - of course we had to giggle it was Vaseline.

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17 year old eyes the candy jar on my desk and picks out a hard cherry candy: What is this?

Me: Pot roast.

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Specializes in School Nursing, Hospice,Med-Surg.

This is my first year as a school nurse. Last year I was a sub here for Nurse T who had been school nurse here for 6 years.

Last week, I was putting a Band-Aid on a 1st grader when she asked, "Hey, do you remember Nurse T?" I said, "Yes, I do." She says, "Yeah, she's off somewhere being a REAL nurse now."

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Specializes in Pedi.

Yesterday, I was talking to a patient (4) and her cousin (3) about Easter. They were asking who is driving everyone to Easter dinner and then the cousin pointed to me and says "who's she going with?" When I told her that I was going to my Mommy's house, her eyes grew wide and she exclaimed "YOU HAVE A MOMMY?" It never occurred to her that adults have mothers. She then got a little upset when we explained to her that her Grandmother was her Mommy's Mommy- "No, she's not your mommy, she's MY Grandma." Love it.

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1st grade boy: "why are there no kids in here?"

Me: "I am being mean so no one will want to come see me."

boy: "You can't be mean, your name is Joy."

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Specializes in School nursing.

I was at our 7th grade assembly today while student were asking questions about an upcoming overnight camping trip. They were told they were not allowed to bring cell phones.

Student: But how will we wake up [in the morning]?

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