11/7: what I learned this week: Trey Anastasio wants to weigh your head; Cerner is stupid

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I have an absolute passion for discharge teaching, especially with new meds and diagnoses.

Sometimes compliance really does depend on convenience.

Cerner is stupid. A one-time stat dose of a med IV will cancel itself and mark itself as complete when that dose isn't given within an hour. The problem with this is if the dose is ordered in the ED and isn't immediately given because the patient needs fluid boluses, dopamine and atropine first, they come up to the floor and it looks like either someone discontinued the med, or administered the med. If anyone less neurotic than me got this med, they wouldn't have spent the half hour I spent going between ED nurse, hospitalist and pharmacy trying to figure out what happened.

Had a patient who is fairly new to alcoholism. New enough that no real damage has been done yet. He came in HR in 30s, SBP in 60s, after falling out in the kitchen. He is the first alcoholic patient I've had that I genuinely believe may be quitting. He's been scared sober.

After sitting on it for nearly two years, I have finally decided on grad school, which one and how to approach it. What I learned from this decision is that I'm probably really going to miss my unit. It's the most chaotic, busy unit in the hospital, and some days are soul crushing, and yet, I just love the people (usually).

If you have an LPN doing an admission assessment, first, make sure it got signed by an RN, but also, actually make sure what was charted is accurate.

If a cardiologist blows off intervention on a patient who has had a ridiculous number of 4-9 second pauses over several days, that patient may become brady and hypotension to a dangerous degree, right before shift change, causing her to need a temporary pacer before she gets the permanent one she was scheduled to get the next day.

AND, if that same cardiologist blows off an intermittent heart rate in the 200s for two days before deciding cardizem might be nice, probably an incident report would be a good idea.

AND, my favorite, most helpful cardiologist has left my favorites list and gotten onto my ess list.

When the generally lazy CN actually tries to "help", she may actually make things SO MUCH WORSE.

When upper management is entirely made of nurses, I genuinely believe this contributes to a wonderful work environment.

Did I mention I love patient teaching?

Four discharges going in simultaneously for four impatient patients makes for a horrible day. HORRIBLE. And of course, discharging 4 means more terribleness. Brace yourselves. Admissions are coming.

When your patient has been saying literally the entire day that she will sign out AMA if she is not discharged, expect her to pull a bait and switch while her husband talks to you at the nurses' station. Also, expect to get security involved when you can't actually find her anywhere. Expect her to be hiding around the corner of the building chain smoking, literally leaning on the "no smoking sign". Expect her to flip out when she thinks security is approaching to force her to go back inside. And then expect your coworkers to be confused when you tell them you had to find her to get her IV out. Dude, I'm not giving her free access to a vein.

(Also expect that to happen at shift change as well.)

Benzos and opiates can metabolize so quickly that ED doses may not pop a UDS positive that evening. I didn't even want to send the UDS to lab because the most likely meds to pop positive on, she'd just gotten in the ED. Unless, of course, grandma is doing coke, meth and ecstasy.

I'm really lacking patience for a couple of posters in the controversy vaccination thread.

Some patients have no problem whatsoever being really nasty to everyone EXCEPT their nurse when they feel the nurse should have done something that that nurse chose not to do. For instance, patient complained of headache and noted there was a nitro patch on, with no order to continue nitro patches. Removed it, waited a little while to see if that worked. The tech goes in and the patient tore him a new one over not getting pain medication. Every time I went into this room, the patient was sound asleep. She got medication and tea with her 2200 meds, and hers were given last because she stayed asleep. When I woke her up, not one single complaint. It's just weird.

I'm incredibly disappointed when floor nurses identify a need, and case management blows it off.

Got a song stuck in my head. It's not all instrumental, I promise. And the lyrics are.... Well, you'll hear. Enjoy.

Phish - "Weigh" (HD) - YouTube

I've learned that my brain is in a complete fog until around noon lately, and I don't know what's up with that.

I've learned on top of the psych stuff running amok at my school there seems to be an outbreak of MONO.

I've learned these sports rosters may never get done.

Still with those sports rosters Far?

Specializes in Cardio-Pulmonary; Med-Surg; Private Duty.
Nope, it's what they gave my pt in the ED before I got him.

You had an ADMISSION for achalasia??? For what reason?

Specializes in Hospice.
I think I'm entirely too suspicious. The OP of the disposable income thread reminds me an awfully lot of the poster who was fascinated with death a few months ago.

Definite possibility. The death obsessed one stopped posting in September, and the new grad with the ginormous disposable income started posting in September (also, don't know whether to laugh or just count my lucky stars, but disposable income pitched a fit and said she blocked me when I gave her advice she didn't want to hear. Hey, not my circus, not my monkeys).

Specializes in Behavioral Health.
Jensmom7 said:
Definite possibility. The death obsessed one stopped posting in September, and the new grad with the ginormous disposable income started posting in September (also, don't know whether to laugh or just count my lucky stars, but disposable income pitched a fit and said she blocked me when I gave her advice she didn't want to hear. Hey, not my circus, not my monkeys).

This started making the rounds on Facebook recently...

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Specializes in Hospice.
This started making the rounds on Facebook recently...

Yes, but fortunately petulant students and flouncy new grads in here are not.

If they want to hear what I say, fine. If they disagree, fine. I love lively debate. But discussing opposing points of view like adults is a whole different ballgame than screaming "You're just old and bitter" and exiting stage left.

P.S. That's a funny meme, though lol.

Carmel By The Sea is adorable. I love NoCal.

Glad you got away!

:no: That is not Northern California. Beautiful . . .but not NorCal.

I still like popping hot packs. :blink:

Does that have something to do with pimples!? ;)

.... We're going to use Cerner EHR to train on charting.

I'm guessing I'll hate it?

Our hospice uses HPMS . . . . .I'll bet you dollars to donuts, our program is worse.

Hate EHR . . . with a purple passion.

Spent the last few days at a hospice conference. I learned that there are hospice nurses who think we should hitch our wagons to physician-assisted suicide, which just became legal in my state.

That makes me sad. I've had to fight the impression for years that some folks have about hospice.

"You just go in and kill people in their homes with morphine, right? I'm not signing up for hospice!!"

:cry:

Specializes in Neuro ICU and Med Surg.

I learned that SURPRISE we are beginning the critical care redesign a week early! I now have an extra floor to cover, and let the insanity begin. It would have been nice to know we were changing things over early.

It amazes me how many people just cannot critically think.

It amazes me how afraid people are of trying for an IV. (I mean just looking for a vein, and trying once.) I don't think everyone will be good at IV's and don't mind helping, but at least try for crying out loud or you will never get better.

This started making the rounds on Facebook recently...

That picture describes me at Scouts every Sunday...

I've learned:

Mongolian spots can be mistaken for abuse.

Some adults should not reproduce.

Children understand the concept of death around 5.

Imaginary friends are okay and acually healthy. But you should never let said imaginary friend take the blame for something your child did. Discipline your child so that others don't have to.

Specializes in Behavioral Health.
That picture describes me at Scouts every Sunday...

I hear you. It's how I feel in community mental health all the time. Solidarity. :)

Unrelated:

Today a patient said to me, "I love coming to see you. I always feel like there's nothing left and then you talk to me about breathing or medicine or a new group and I feel hope." :D

I'm all about teaching people breathing techniques.

I learned that I should have scheduled my OR observation day earlier because I missed out on a huge mediastinal teratoma and I'm fascinated by stuff like that.

Specializes in Hospice.

I learned that having a post removed, along with others, under the "off topic" umbrella, when it was neither rude nor divisive, and asked a legitimate question is really irritating. Really.

But, I'm not complaining.

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