I just need some advice - or a hug. One or the other.

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Hi everyone - new user here!

I have been working my first job as a registered nurse at a community based hospital since April 2016 and I am very sad to say that I think I hate it :crying2:

I have worked as a med-surf float and more recently on the telemetry unit. I can't help but feel a never ending sense of anxiety when it comes to work. We are always understaffed and the acuity has been so high lately. I can't even keep up some nights and have had to go to the break room or medroom to cry. It's embarrassing, but sometimes I can't help it. There was a night where I had two heparin drips, a combative/high fall risk dementia patient, a blood transfusion, as well as getting hit with two admissions within two hours of each other - An unfair assignment in my opinion.

Just when I feel as if I am advancing in the nursing practice, I feel like I take 10 steps backwards. Then on top of it, I have experienced some very mean/rude patients. I get it, they're in a time where they are vulnerable and sick, but being called a "useless b****" because I told a patient we ran out of turkey sandwiches (at 2am) doesn't sit well with me.

I want to cry before every shift and I feel depressed. Sometimes even on my days off. I work night shift 7P-7A and it does not help that my boyfriend works first shift. There are weeks where we will go 4 straight days without seeing each other, and we live together! I can never sleep right during the day, or now even at night for that matter. Hence why I am up at 0230 venting.

I have been desperately applying to other areas of nursing and praying for a day shift. I know people who work in outpatient settings and absolutely love their jobs. I am envious because I wanted nothing more than to love nursing, and this job makes me feel the total opposite.

Sorry for the the long rant and thanks to those who read it! I just had to get that out there.

Love to all!

I think it's important for you to realize that you are not taking steps backward. I'm a new grad on tele, and that's just how tele is. One day I started out with five patients, had two discharges, then an admission. One of those patients went into symptomatic afib RVR almost as soon as I got there. I feel like almost all of my patients are always fall risks. At least once a week (usually) there's a patient on an amnio drip. I think it's a very stressful floor. It's so easy to feel overwhelmed. You have to be able to think fast, but when you're new, you still feel like you need time to just look at the info you have and think.

So just remember that you're not talking steps back. And as you encounter these stressful situations, you're actually learning and progressing.

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Specializes in ED, Tele, MedSurg, ADN, Outpatient, LTC, Peds.

You described to a T my first year in telemetry. That is a rough floor with a first turnover. At some point. "the rhythm is gonna get you" and the flow will get better.

In terms of night duty, even though I am a night owl, I was surprised that I could do the night shift with no issues but could not sleep at all during the day and became my evil twin. I was very cranky and irritable with my family.

Once , I shifted to days/evening and could sleep at night, that resolved!

It is important to have a vent buddy/journal so that you can get it out at the end of the day.

If you are absolutely miserable, apply, apply till you get a reply! Network with other nurses esp at your hosp,look at job posting esp ED/icu/cicu if you want to continue in critical care.

In the meantime, "HUGS"! This too shall pass!

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Specializes in TBI and SCI.

I can u deist and your frustration and anxiety to some level. I've been a Nurse for a year and a half, but I consider myself very new still. I worked in drug tx for 8 months which I felt I wasted so much time, because I wasn't practicing all my skills. The only benefit was learning psych meds. Now here I am with a previous 6. O this of not working because I moved states (long story) and barely any SNF work and now I work st a SNF with a pt load from 14-17. My second shift alone I got a new admit. I get so much anxiety when it hits 0430 and I need to do my morning meds and any tx I haven't done. I've been here about a month and a half and I still have days I want to cry because I just feel I suck. I don't know everything and I just feel I'm a bad Nurse.

You've been working a year, you have lots of experience, you can def find something else, it just takes time. I applied to jobs for 2 months after getting licensed here in Arizona and when I turned down one job because of low pay, I went on indeed and found this job, my dream job. Be patient. Just remember you're resume is looking amazing because of all this you have endured!!!!!!!!

You're an awesome Nurse, don't forget that.

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Specializes in ER.

The night shift part of your situation may bigger than you know. I worked nights for about a year before going to 11a-11p where I've been for more than 2 decades. I liked nursing that first year, but I never felt well rested. Some people can shake up their rhythm, some just have to sleep at night to feel right.

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Specializes in critical care ICU.
There was a night where I had two heparin drips, a combative/high fall risk dementia patient, a blood transfusion, as well as getting hit with two admissions within two hours of each other

Sounds like a typical shift for me...BUT I DO SYMPATHIZE! *hugs* It's rough feeling constantly overwhelmed. What's the ratio for that unit? I'm on tele and it's 1:4. Are there people in your unit you trust to give advice? At least with the heparin drips all you have to make sure you keep track of are the anti-Xa draws. Most people tolerate heparin pretty well. Just watch their CBC/platelets for possible HIT. Combative? They may benefit from a sitter and/or pharmacological intervention (ativan?). It's a lot to juggle, I know.

You are not alone in this. I have gone home and cried because of the day I had. It can be easy to burn out. That's why it's good to have a support system (this site for example...but you should have real life in person ones too). It isn't always bad!! There are periods of ups and downs. I had 2 weeks of bad assignments, and then I finally had a good day. Hang in there

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It sounds to me like a combination of reality shock and trying to adapt to night shift. I was a slow one to adapt, as another poster referred to in an earlier post-you may be as well. Having acknowledged that, night shift may not be for you. I worked nights for over a year and finally had to transfer to another unit to work days. I could not sleep, eat or function normally. My digestive system was shot, as were my nerves. I tried all of the tricks: altering my sleep schedule even when I was off; black out curtains, white noise, etc. but nothing worked. While day shift has its own problems, it worked better for my natural body rhythm. I also think you should address the depression-been there as well. If you can work on that first then perhaps find a day time position maybe it will work for you. Either way, I feel your pain and am sending heaping helpings of hugs!

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Specializes in Med/Surg, LTACH, LTC, Home Health.

Oh WOW!!! Med/Surg float is the way to do bedside nursing....unless yours is a fulltime position. When I did it, I never did my days back to back after I realized the kind of assignments I'd be getting. One shift at the beginning of the week, and one shift at the end:up:. If your float position is also PRN, work with it! Space those shifts out, or do two or three at the beginning of one week, then two or three at the end of the next week. That will give you a mini vacation every week in between...that is, if you have the option of setting your own schedule. Hopefully you do.

Good luck to you! (((HUGS)))

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There is nothing wrong with the way that you are feeling! You have a lot on your plate and it sounds like you don't feel like you're able to provide adequate care and you don't feel valued. Every single nurse has felt some variation of what you're feeling and believe me we have all cried. It's a good sign that you're not happy with the chaos--it means that you have a great moral compass.

Have you discussed the issues with management? Have you tried to enact some measures to make it better? If you're not happy you definitely need to find another job. Nursing is a great career and it gets better. There are so many other options. You just need to find a job that is a good fit for you and your lifestyle.

If you were able to handle this you will ace any other position. Keep looking and this will make you a better nurse. Don't give up and don't give in!

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Specializes in ICU, ER, NURSING EDUCATION.

Here's advice and a (((((HUG))))).

I have been in your shoes. My first year or so as a new grad was a LIVING HELL. I totally get how you're feeling.

I would advise you to keep looking for another position. Working nights AND on a floor you hate, esp when you're still a kinda new nurse is rough mentally, physically and spiritually.

- You must take care of yourself on your days off.

- DO NOT think about work when you're home. When you do, tell yourself NO!

- Release those negative thoughts. Remind yourself while you're applying for a new gig, that there WILL be an end to this hell!

You can do it. You will do it!

Nursing is an awesome and rewarding profession.

Once you get some time and experience under your belt on a unit that is the right fit for you, you will feel so much better and actually enjoy your work.

Positive thoughts, good things will come your way!

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Specializes in Neurology.

Nurses are caring, so this might be hard to do, but one of the best pieces of advice I have received when feeling burnt out was to "try not to internalize everything." Yes, it is stressful to be running all of those heparin gtts and a blood transfusion, BUT the patient yelling at you for not having a turkey sandwich... can't let that get to you. You have bigger fish to fry.

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I feel your pain! I worked yesterday with 6-7 pts while another nurse had one! Yes one pt! We are always understaffed. Just last week I had two pts getting blood back to back plus they were trying to give me a new admit (plus no aide). I am so frustrated with nursing and wish I'd followed my heart and applied for the ER instead of a M/S floor! I'm discouraged wth nursing and I'm hoping something better comes open soon. Hang in there friend! Hugs!

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If you are feeling this way (which is pretty normal). I think most nurses feel this way somewhat at one time or another than I would suggest to transfer to a different unit and try to get day shift. Youve been on your unit for over 1 year so Im sure you would be able to apply to annew unit. As a new nurse Inwould jump around to different areas until you find what you like. And if then you still hate it then maybe consider new options as a new asuxh as leaving the hospital setting.

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